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Arena Slave

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I'll also add this: I have tough skin, and getting some constructive criticism would be pleasant and refreshing. When I get NO criticism, it can be hard to know if everybody is really paying attention. ;) With that in mind, if anybody thinks that my second draft is inferior to my first (maybe I've added too much and taken away from it by explaining to death?) please say so! Or anything else you would have done differently. Thanks again for reading at all. :)
 
I took hold of her tunic again. Another few pulls brought it to a pile about her ankles. I took a step back. There she was, naked, and shaking. I was shaking some too. She did her best to cover herself with her arms and hands. It didn't feel as good as I had expected to act like a guard. Such sorrowful eyes!
Madiosi 2017-048-Arena Slave01.jpg
 
Something about the sight of these three large, muscular men swarming around the small girl made me angry. She couldn't even speak to them. It was all very fast, and soon one of them had his boot on her naked buttocks, shoving her forward, trotting unsteadily toward the sunlight, toward her own death. Then she was gone. When she returned from the events in the arena, she would be a lifeless corpse. I wished I could call her back to explain.
Madiosi 2017-049-Arena Slave01.jpg
 
Ooops, a blonde!!! And i used first a brunette.
View attachment 484778

OK, since Juan asked for criticism (brave man) I will say this-the Roman Empire covered large parts of Europe, but also much of North Africa and the Middle East. It was very diverse. That often isn't reflected here and I wish it were to a greater extent. But I did like Juan's story and I'm not really sure which of the two versions I prefer.
 
OK, since Juan asked for criticism (brave man) I will say this-the Roman Empire covered large parts of Europe, but also much of North Africa and the Middle East. It was very diverse. That often isn't reflected here and I wish it were to a greater extent. But I did like Juan's story and I'm not really sure which of the two versions I prefer.
Windar - my sincere thanks for being frank and honest. :) For this story, I decided to make her blonde because I was thinking of her as a German from beyond the Rhine, and because I've never had a blonde in any of my stories before. Just thought I'd try something different. I wanted the language barrier to be there, and obviously there are lots of non-blonde options that could suggest a language barrier, but the German idea seemed to make sense. Since I'd never done blonde before, I thought I'd go for it. In general I agree with you, though. I would think the majority of people in the empire were not blond. :) (If it makes any difference, I didn't make her blonde because I prefer blondes. I personally tend to prefer the darker features. No offense to the many GORGIOUS blondes on this site. All girls are beautiful.) :)

Thanks again for your comment, Windar.
 
Windar - my sincere thanks for being frank and honest. :) For this story, I decided to make her blonde because I was thinking of her as a German from beyond the Rhine, and because I've never had a blonde in any of my stories before. Just thought I'd try something different. I wanted the language barrier to be there, and obviously there are lots of non-blonde options that could suggest a language barrier, but the German idea seemed to make sense. Since I'd never done blonde before, I thought I'd go for it. In general I agree with you, though. I would think the majority of people in the empire were not blond. :) (If it makes any difference, I didn't make her blonde because I prefer blondes. I personally tend to prefer the darker features. No offense to the many GORGIOUS blondes on this site. All girls are beautiful.) :)

Thanks again for your comment, Windar.

Juan-I am usually frank and honest. In diplomacy that means they spent two hours yelling at each other, but that isn't the case at all.

My comment wasn't meant specifically for your story, but as a general comment. I don't have hard numbers but I bet that 90% or more of the women crucified in Rome on CF are not just European, but northern European. And I don't think that's what the breakdown of real crucifixions was (though real crucifixions were also predominantly male).

There were German slaves in Rome and probably a few were crucified, so there is nothing wrong with a particular story having one. I was just struck by the discussion of the picture-blonde vs brunette, but no jet black, kinky, etc.

As for all women being beautiful, that I must agree with:)
 
Fine illustrations, Madi
The Romans found blondes attractive because they were rare. Perhaps they preferred to see blondes in the arena.
Also notice that Gallia Transalpina wasn't conquered before the first century BC.
Yes, the romans bought for good gold and money golden german women hair. The first good export hit ware of Germania Libera.
 
The majority of the population of the Empire at anytime would have come from the Mediterranean region - Italians, Greeks, Semites, Egyptians, North Africans - and would have been dark haired. One exception might have been the Iberians. These were Celts - modern Spanish and Portuguese are a later, more ancestry - and related to the Gauls. They likely had hair colors ranging from black to dark blond. Rome invaded Iberia during the Second Punic war in 216 BCE, although it took about 200 years to completely subdue the region. During this time, lots of Celto-Iberians would have been taken as slaves. Later, Iberians became part of the Imperial population. The Emperors Trajan, Hadrian and Marcus Aurelius were from Hispania.
Gaul became a part of the Empire in the First Century BCE and Britain in the First Century CE. Also, beginning in the First Century, the Empire began inviting German tribes into its territory to defend it against other Germans.
I remember reading once that, when the first blond slave girls began appearing in the markets in Rome, the men were so taken by them that the Roman women began dying their hair blond in order to compete.

Juan;
Leaving aside all this stuff about hair, your written an excellent story. You've managed to pack a powerful tale into a very short story. We don't really need to make it any longer.:clapping:
 
The majority of the population of the Empire at anytime would have come from the Mediterranean region - Italians, Greeks, Semites, Egyptians, North Africans - and would have been dark haired. One exception might have been the Iberians. These were Celts - modern Spanish and Portuguese are a later, more ancestry - and related to the Gauls. They likely had hair colors ranging from black to dark blond. Rome invaded Iberia during the Second Punic war in 216 BCE, although it took about 200 years to completely subdue the region. During this time, lots of Celto-Iberians would have been taken as slaves. Later, Iberians became part of the Imperial population. The Emperors Trajan, Hadrian and Marcus Aurelius were from Hispania.
Gaul became a part of the Empire in the First Century BCE and Britain in the First Century CE. Also, beginning in the First Century, the Empire began inviting German tribes into its territory to defend it against other Germans.
I remember reading once that, when the first blond slave girls began appearing in the markets in Rome, the men were so taken by them that the Roman women began dying their hair blond in order to compete.

Juan;
Leaving aside all this stuff about hair, your written an excellent story. You've managed to pack a powerful tale into a very short story. We don't really need to make it any longer.:clapping:
My grandparents were born in NW and NE Italy, Rome, and Sicily yet my eldest sister is blonde... Does hair coloring count??? ...she was a Breck Girl!
 
My grandparents were born in NW and NE Italy, Rome, and Sicily yet my eldest sister is blonde... Does hair coloring count??? ...she was a Breck Girl!

Somewhere along the family line someone probably ran off with one of those guys from a blue state on the other side of the Alps. ;)
 
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