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Now This Just Isn't Funny
- Thread starter admihoek
- Start date
connoisseurs
Senator
I´m no expert on this, but wouldn´t even gay men like a rear like this?You know, if he’s gay he could simply be uninterested.
Crux-Emperor Baracus X
Rectidolor
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
Near where I grew up, in the Pennsylvania Dutch country, there is a short-line railroad, The Strasburg Railroad. The run steam train excursions for tourists from their base in Strasberg 4 1/2 miles to the little town of Paradise. They bill themselves as "The Road to Paradise!" I think the Oxford and Roman Railway might claim that title!
Railway??
BTW from Wiki:
The Strasburg Rail Road is the oldest continuously operating railroad in the western hemisphere and the oldest public utility in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania. Chartered in 1832, the Strasburg Rail Road continues to operate under its original charter and original name (Strasburg Rail Road Company). Located just outside of the town of Strasburg, Pennsylvania, the railroad is a heritage railroad offering excursion trains, hauled by steam locomotives, through the heart of world-famous Pennsylvania Dutch Country. Strasburg currently has five (5) serviceable historic steam locomotives on its roster and has the nation's largest fleet of historic wooden passenger coaches in operation. The Strasburg Rail Road is also one of the few railroads in the United States to occasionally use steam locomotives to haul revenue freight trains. It hosts 300,000 visitors per year.[1]
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
old slave
FELIS RESPICIENS
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before a masterpiece.
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day . . .30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men.’
The husband said 'What?'
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.’
The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me and God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!’
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day . . .30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men.’
The husband said 'What?'
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.’
The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me and God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!’
connoisseurs
Senator
NW Arkansas
The old mule
An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From morning til night (and sometimes later), she was always complaining about something. The only time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule. He tried to plow a lot. One day, when he was out plowing, his wife brought him lunch in the field. He drove the old mule into the shade, sat down on a stump, and began to eat his lunch. Immediately, his wife began haranguing him again. Complain, nag, nag; it just went on and on. All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind feet; caught her smack in the back of the head. Killed her dead on the spot. At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something rather odd. When a woman mourner would approach the old farmer, he would listen for a minute, then nod his head in agreement; but when a man mourner approached him, he would listen for a minute, then shake his head in disagreement. This was so consistent, the minister decided to ask the old farmer about it. So after the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer, and asked him why he nodded his head and agreed with the women, but always shook his head and disagreed with all the men. The old farmer said, "Well, the women would come up and say something about how nice my wife looked, or how pretty her dress was, so I'd nod my head in agreement." "And what about the men?" the minister asked. "They wanted to know if the mule was for sale."
The old mule
An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From morning til night (and sometimes later), she was always complaining about something. The only time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule. He tried to plow a lot. One day, when he was out plowing, his wife brought him lunch in the field. He drove the old mule into the shade, sat down on a stump, and began to eat his lunch. Immediately, his wife began haranguing him again. Complain, nag, nag; it just went on and on. All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind feet; caught her smack in the back of the head. Killed her dead on the spot. At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something rather odd. When a woman mourner would approach the old farmer, he would listen for a minute, then nod his head in agreement; but when a man mourner approached him, he would listen for a minute, then shake his head in disagreement. This was so consistent, the minister decided to ask the old farmer about it. So after the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer, and asked him why he nodded his head and agreed with the women, but always shook his head and disagreed with all the men. The old farmer said, "Well, the women would come up and say something about how nice my wife looked, or how pretty her dress was, so I'd nod my head in agreement." "And what about the men?" the minister asked. "They wanted to know if the mule was for sale."
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
Very good!
connoisseurs
Senator
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
And after being extra careful like that, some nut will want to take away his gun!
Last edited:
connoisseurs
Senator
If Texas wouldn´t be named explicit, I would have thought about PP
$7.00 SEX
A Texas couple, both well into their 80's, go to a Sex Therapist's office. The doctor asks, 'What can I do for you?' The man says, 'Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?' The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.
When the couple finishes, the doctor says, 'There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse..' He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says good bye.
The next week, the same couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees.
This happens several weeks in a row. The couple makes an appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leave.
Finally, after 3 months of this routine, the doctor says, 'I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?'
The man says, 'We're not trying to find out anything. She's married; so we can't go to her house. I'm married; and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $98. The Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50, and best of all....
Medicare pays $43 of it.
$7.00 SEX
A Texas couple, both well into their 80's, go to a Sex Therapist's office. The doctor asks, 'What can I do for you?' The man says, 'Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?' The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.
When the couple finishes, the doctor says, 'There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse..' He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says good bye.
The next week, the same couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees.
This happens several weeks in a row. The couple makes an appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leave.
Finally, after 3 months of this routine, the doctor says, 'I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?'
The man says, 'We're not trying to find out anything. She's married; so we can't go to her house. I'm married; and we can't go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $98. The Hilton charges $139. We do it here for $50, and best of all....
Medicare pays $43 of it.
connoisseurs
Senator
My wife had a few girlsfriends over for a ladys night.
Before there were preparations to do
and afterwards the great clean up
But I was really surprised by that
Before there were preparations to do
and afterwards the great clean up
But I was really surprised by that
Yikes! You wouldn't want to get that mixed up with the others would you!
Barb, for heaven's sake make sure you read the fine print on the user instructions!!
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
Crux-Emperor Baracus X
Rectidolor
(yeah I'm pretty controversial...I wouldn't be here otherwise !!)
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
#3 you list the rules that no one can argue about.. How about a list of things the gals might object to!
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
The art of courtship in cruxforums to find your soulmate:
