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Now This Just Isn't Funny
- Thread starter admihoek
- Start date
Crux-Emperor Baracus X
Rectidolor
M
montycrusto
Guest
Public Safety Announcement
(GIF)
(GIF)
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
old slave
FELIS RESPICIENS
A few 2-liners:
I built an electric fence around my property yesterday.
My neighbor is dead against it.
I’ve been dating a homeless woman recently, and I think it’s starting to get serious…
She’s asked me to move out with her.
I bought a dog off a blacksmith today.
As soon as I got it home it made a bolt for the door.
My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic…
But I refused. If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.
My wife accused me of being a transvestite.
So I packed her things and left.
I built an electric fence around my property yesterday.
My neighbor is dead against it.
I’ve been dating a homeless woman recently, and I think it’s starting to get serious…
She’s asked me to move out with her.
I bought a dog off a blacksmith today.
As soon as I got it home it made a bolt for the door.
My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic…
But I refused. If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.
My wife accused me of being a transvestite.
So I packed her things and left.
connoisseurs
Senator
Loxuru
Graf von Kreuzigung
Notice from the manufacturer : this chair is designed for relaxing. We deny any responsibility for adverse use of this furniture.
RacingRodent
Consul
Notice from the manufacturer : this chair is designed for relaxing. We deny any responsibility for adverse use of this furniture.
She looked very relaxed to me
I'm keeping some of these as dad jokes, the rest aren't suitable! I do like the dog joke
That's about right. In this house the answer is usually "she's in the bathroom" or "she's in the laundry", or sometimes, "she's lying down"
messaline
Crucified Amazon
Some people say that it's the best position for the woman , because the erected cock is caressing in first the Gpoint on the top of the vagina'enter ...
What do you think about ? (women obviously
)
connoisseurs
Senator
It is also the best position for her because not only the man but she can see the game on tv too!
good point - in many senses!Some people say that it's the best position for the woman , because the erected cock is caressing in first the Gpoint on the top of the vagina'enter ...
What do you think about ? (women obviously
my favourite is the bridge, where I'm on my back,
shoulders on the bed/ floor/ ground etc.
trunk, pelvis and thighs lifted up, legs wide, feet firmly planted ...
he kneels to make a good thrusting entry, and can rough me up -
breasts, hair etc. - as much as he likes while he's pumping me,
I can use my body to respond to his rhythm and urge him on!
messaline
Crucified Amazon
I'll try when I'll meet a man ... soon ...good point - in many senses!
my favourite is the bridge, where I'm on my back,
shoulders on the bed/ floor/ ground etc.
trunk, pelvis and thighs lifted up, legs wide, feet firmly planted ...
he kneels to make a good thrusting entry, and can rough me up -
breasts, hair etc. - as much as he likes while he's pumping me,
I can use my body to respond to his rhythm and urge him on!
old slave
FELIS RESPICIENS
One night a man and a woman are both at a bar knocking back a few beers.
They start talking and come to realise that they're both doctors.
After about an hour, the man says to the woman, "Hey. How about if we sleep together tonight. No strings attached. It'll just be one night of fun."
The woman doctor agrees to it.
So they go back to her place and he goes in the bedroom.
She goes in the bathroom and starts scrubbing up like she's about to go into the operating room.
Finally she goes in the bedroom and they have sex for an hour or so.
Afterwards, the man says to the woman, "You're a surgeon, aren't you?"
"Yeah, how did you know?"
The man says, "I could tell by the way you scrubbed up before we started."
"Oh, that makes sense", says the woman. " You're an anesthesiologist aren't you?"
"Yeah", says the man a bit surprised. "How did you know?"
The woman answers, "Because I didn't feel a thing."
They start talking and come to realise that they're both doctors.
After about an hour, the man says to the woman, "Hey. How about if we sleep together tonight. No strings attached. It'll just be one night of fun."
The woman doctor agrees to it.
So they go back to her place and he goes in the bedroom.
She goes in the bathroom and starts scrubbing up like she's about to go into the operating room.
Finally she goes in the bedroom and they have sex for an hour or so.
Afterwards, the man says to the woman, "You're a surgeon, aren't you?"
"Yeah, how did you know?"
The man says, "I could tell by the way you scrubbed up before we started."
"Oh, that makes sense", says the woman. " You're an anesthesiologist aren't you?"
"Yeah", says the man a bit surprised. "How did you know?"
The woman answers, "Because I didn't feel a thing."
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
Praefectus Praetorio
R.I.P. Brother of the Quill
I'm told this is how the girlfriends of all my Ladies feel.
