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Now This Just Isn't Funny

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Wragg said:
Is it really SO long since we had rotary phones? :facepalm::confused::eek::doh::confused::confused::confused:
Click to expand...
Push Button, touch-tone, digital dialing was introduced in the US in the '70s, by the mid-80s, no new rotaries were produced. I'm not sure how fast the change over took place in benighted regions like the UK.
 
It's a beautiful sunny day in England today, and a public holiday, so what about a BBQ? Since we so rarely get the chance to have one, here is a set of instructions:

BBQ RULES:

We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to
refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking
activity.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are
put into motion:

(1) The woman buys the food.

(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along
with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the
man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion
zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding
activities can take place without the interference of the woman.

Here comes the important part:

(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

(6) The woman goes inside to organise the plates and cutlery.

(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking
great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he
flips the meat.

Important again:

(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins,
sauces, and brings them to the table.

(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes

And most important of all:

(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ', and,
upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no
pleasing some women.
 
old slave said:
It's a beautiful sunny day in England today, and a public holiday, so what about a BBQ? Since we so rarely get the chance to have one, here is a set of instructions:

BBQ RULES:

We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to
refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking
activity.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are
put into motion:

(1) The woman buys the food.

(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along
with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the
man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion
zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding
activities can take place without the interference of the woman.

Here comes the important part:

(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

(6) The woman goes inside to organise the plates and cutlery.

(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking
great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he
flips the meat.

Important again:

(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins,
sauces, and brings them to the table.

(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes

And most important of all:

(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ', and,
upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no
pleasing some women.
Click to expand...
Such a wonderful custom, the classic male-centered BBQ! Reminds me of Pippas Passes by Robert Browning
The year's at the spring
And day's at the morn;
Morning's at seven;
The hill-side's dew-pearled;
The lark's on the wing;
The snail's on the thorn:
God's in his heaven—
All's right with the world!
 
Praefectus Praetorio said:
Such a wonderful custom, the classic male-centered BBQ! Reminds me of Pippas Passes by Robert Browning
The year's at the spring
And day's at the morn;
Morning's at seven;
The hill-side's dew-pearled;
The lark's on the wing;
The snail's on the thorn:
God's in his heaven—
All's right with the world!
Click to expand...

The spring is sprung, the grass is riz.
I wonder where the boidie is.
They say the boidie’s on the wing.
But that’s absoid. The wing is on the bird.
 
Sorry, but I am still obsessed with the rotary phone stories ...
Hm, having still German minority relatives in Romania, I remember "alien situations" in Germany and in Romania as well concerning telephone calls to the other country.
In Germany as probably everywhere in the world, the state-run bureaucracy is the slowest institution to install new technical devices as long as the old ones are still working.
So, I think, I was making in 1991 in Germany a telephone call in a telephone box with a rotary phone attached to the wall inside a German post office via a German operator (of which I did not know that they really existed yet) to a Romanian operator who was telling there via the post office servant to my relatives how and where to use a special telephone box in their post office to receive my telephone call.
It was one of the longest and most expensive telephone calls of my life - although the much cheaper but even longer telephone call in 1995 from Romania to Germany is worth writing a paperback book about.
And now, almost 30 years later, I could theoretically call everyone of them in Romania on their mobile phone via my mobile one - if there were not so many mountains causing dead spots in their Bucovinian region. They are now even making jokes in Romania that they are now the most progressive telephone callers in the world because different to most other countries in the world, the archaelogists of the future will not find any "ancient" telephone copper cables in this country, but only cell phones, so the archaelogists will think in 1000 years, the Romanians invented them.

Remark for "phlebas": Some of these clips may be not genuine, but the one of the two 17 years old cousins is most probably very genuine, because this clip was one of the most clicked last year on YouTube and they do not really look happy to have become so "famous", even on TV :oops::eek: :
 
As far as I recall, Rotary phones got phased out during the second half of the eighties. But operators that's a different story. I still recall having asked to be connected by an operator! Give that to a seventeen year old. Only 50 years ago, calling to France to book a hotel! Calling the local operator, connecting to the central operator for international calls. Connecting to the operator in Paris. From there to the operator in the Departement. Then to a local operator, to finally be connected with the hotel! That, kids, is a Phone call!
 
I do not know how the situation is right now but all of our telephone stories could have been easily topped by some historical difficulties in Africa of which I heard in a French news magazine on the TV station ARTE only 10 years ago: Côte d'Ivoire (Ivory Coast) is a neighbouring state of Ghana but belonged to the French colonial system and Ghana to the British Commonwealth. When you wanted to make a telephone call from Ivory Coast to Ghana, you better had taken a carrier pigeon, because the call was routed via operators in Paris and London back to Africa and you only have to imagine how well French operators understood English operators and a nice African afternoon in Ghana and Ivory Coast was "gone with the wind ..."!
 
Silent_Water said:
I do not know how the situation is right now but all of our telephone stories could have been easily topped by some historical difficulties in Africa of which I heard in a French news magazine on the TV station ARTE only 10 years ago: Côte d'Ivoire (Ivory Coast) is a neighbouring state of Ghana but belonged to the French colonial system and Ghana to the British Commonwealth. When you wanted to make a telephone call from Ivory Coast to Ghana, you better had taken a carrier pigeon, because the call was routed via operators in Paris and London back to Africa and you only have to imagine how well French operators understood English operators and a nice African afternoon in Ghana and Ivory Coast was "gone with the wind ..."!
Click to expand...

Actually my late mother once worked on the British international exchange and they were all required to speak French.
 
old slave said:
It's a beautiful sunny day in England today, and a public holiday, so what about a BBQ? Since we so rarely get the chance to have one, here is a set of instructions:

BBQ RULES:

We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to
refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking
activity.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are
put into motion:

(1) The woman buys the food.

(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along
with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the
man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion
zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding
activities can take place without the interference of the woman.

Here comes the important part:

(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

(6) The woman goes inside to organise the plates and cutlery.

(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking
great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he
flips the meat.

Important again:

(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins,
sauces, and brings them to the table.

(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes

And most important of all:

(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ', and,
upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no
pleasing some women.
Click to expand...

I saw this all the time growing up. So true! So true!

Just one difference. My dad always bought the meat himself that he was going to grill (steaks) or BBQ. Mom never did. Dad claimed he just wanted to get the "right" meat. As though my mom had no idea how to buy! Sheesh! She did all the other shopping!

Only he prepared it and placed it on the grill. We women--mom and I and any female guests--could watch and do all the other work and clean-up, but only dad--and later my brother--could touch the meat! Mom and I joked to each other, and to dad, about it.

Would we taint the meat if we touched it? Or had anything to do with its preparation? Dad just brushed us away saying it was his job to use the grill.

One day my mom and I were sitting on the patio while dad was slow-cooking some ribs on the grill. He had set a timer for when he'd flip them around on the cool side. The timer went off while he had gone inside to take a piss and (you guessed it) get another beer. I got up and shouted through the patio screen "I'll turn 'em dad," observing that this was finally my chance to involve myself in the grilling. Mom got up too and stood next to me to enjoy my moment of encroaching on the sacred male ritual.

Just as I was ready to flip the slabs dad dashed out of the house and shouted "That's okay, that's okay, I got it," as he gently nudged us aside and took the tongs from my hand. Mom and I just stood staring at him as he performed this crucial task. I was 14 years old and thought myself quite the woman at that age. I blurted out "Geeze dad, it's not like mom and I are menstruating or anything! We won't taint 'em! Promise!"

Dad's mouth opened and his jaw dropped as he stared at me, looking for some words to say to his outspoken teenage daughter. "Really, Marcella," he said, obviously shocked., "must you?" Mom was laughing so hard I thought she's never stop. I was proud of myself! I has assaulted the male grilling hegemony!

Dad never spoke about what I had said, but mom and I to this day laugh ourselves silly every time we recall that special day on the patio.

True story.
 
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Marcella said:
I saw this all the time growing up. So true! So true!

Just one difference. My dad always bought the meat himself that he was going to grill (steaks) or BBQ. Mom never did. Dad claimed he just wanted to get the "right" meat. As though my mom had no idea how to buy! Sheesh! She did all the other shopping!

Only he prepared it and placed it on the grill. We women--mom and I and any female guests--could watch and do all the other work and clean-up, but only dad--and later my brother--could touch the meat! Mom and I joked to each other, and to dad, about it.

Would we taint the meat if we touched it? Or had anything to do with its preparation? Dad just brushed us away saying it was his job to use the grill.

One day my mom and I were sitting on the patio while dad was slow-cooking some ribs on the grill. He had set a timer for when he'd flip them around on the cool side. The timer went off while he had gone inside to take a piss and (you guessed it) get another beer. I got up and shouted through the patio screen "I'll turn 'em dad," observing that this was finally my chance to involve myself in the grilling. Mom got up too and stood next to me to enjoy my moment of encroaching on the sacred male ritual.

Just as I was ready to flip the slabs dad dashed out of the house and shouted "That's okay, that's okay, I got it," as he gently nudged us aside and took the tongs from my hand. Mom and I just stood staring at him as he performed this crucial task. I was 14 years old and thought myself quite the woman at that age. I blurted out "Geeze dad, it's not like mom and I are menstruating or anything! We won't taint 'em! Promise!"

Dad's mouth opened and his jaw dropped as he stared at me, looking for some words to say to his outspoken teenage daughter. "Really, Marcella," he said, obviously shocked., "must you?" Mom was laughing so hard I thought she's never stop. I was proud of myself! I has assaulted the male grilling hegemony!

Dad never spoke about what I had said, but mom and I to this day laugh ourselves silly every time we recall that special day on the patio.

True story.

For years later, and to this day, mom and I can't control ourselves when we recall that day.
Click to expand...
What you gals got to realize is that the grill is the outdoor equivalent of the TV remote!
 
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fallenmystic said:
I wonder how many tech heads we have here, but this is a real RFC :) :
A Standard for the Transmission of IP Datagrams on Avian Carriers

And there’s even an actual implementation.
Click to expand...
I like that! Especially

Discussion​
​
Multiple types of service can be provided with a prioritized pecking​
order. An additional property is built-in worm detection and​
eradication. Because IP only guarantees best effort delivery, loss​
of a carrier can be tolerated. With time, the carriers are self-​
regenerating. While broadcasting is not specified, storms can cause​
data loss. There is persistent delivery retry, until the carrier​
drops. Audit trails are automatically generated, and can often be​
found on logs and cable trays.​
 
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