I have a bigger head than that...You seem to be learning a few things about consolidating power, anyway. Been reading at all?
And I drink...
and smoke...
and wear a hat...
and sunglasses...
Otherwise it looks just like me!!!
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Princess Laetitia And Palace Intrigue
- Thread starter thehangingtree
- Start date
And I drink...
and smoke...
and wear a hat...
and sunglasses...
Otherwise it looks just like me!!!
Why does shit like this always happen to me on a Tree story? Here I thought I was going to get to be a Princess. But no! First I got used physically in more than one place by Prince whats-his-face, then I get make-believe racked but it turns out to be real, and then I am poisoned with rot gut. And all for what purpose? Somebody please tell me. Sigh. 
Nice writing Prince!
Nice writing Prince!
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Artifex Imaginum
Poisoned whiskey! 
Worse than holy water! 
"Poison Whiskey"
Daddy was a Cajun, raised on Southern land
And so my kinfolks tell me, was a street-fightin' man.
Well, they rushed him down to see the doctor
"Hey doctor, won't you check his head?"
The only thing that was wrong with him
Was Johnny Walker's Red
He drank ole poison whiskey
'Til it killed him dead.
It happened back in the bayou many years ago
Satan came to take him and he did it real slow
Well, they rushed him back to see the doctor
The doctor just shook his head,
"Twenty years of rotgut whiskey
Done killed the poor man dead."
He drank ole poison whiskey
'Til it killed him dead.
Take a tip from me, people... brothers can't you see
Ain't no future in ole poison whiskey.
They're gonna rush you down to see the doctor,
The doctor's gonna shake his head.
The only thing he's gonna tell ya
"Stop drinkin' Johnny Walker's Red
Don't drink poison whiskey, don't you drink it boy.
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old slave
FELIS RESPICIENS
My grandma kept a pub; Johnnie Walker Red was her favourite. She started feeding it to me when I was aged about eight years. Sixty years later I'm still going strong, though my taste has changed to Islay malts.
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Artifex Imaginum
Thanks to Johnnie Walker you have grown up fast.Johnnie Walker Red may be good for you but apparently not for the Cajuns in the bayous of Louisiana.
And maid Barbaria calls it rot gut.
I hope the dearly departed Maid Barbaria will forgive me for having her poisoned but a woman of such ambition that she would turn on my sister surely has the possibility of turning on me when it suits her goals! -Prince TreeWhy does shit like this always happen to me on a Tree story? Here I thought I was going to get to be a Princess. But no! First I got used physically in more than one place by Prince whats-his-face, then I get make-believe racked but it turns out to be real, and then I am poisoned with rot gut. And all for what purpose? Somebody please tell me. Sigh.
Nice writing Prince!
We are about to get hit with strong storms. If I am not back soon the power went out!!!Even the Archbish is forced to agree!
I promise that...Keep the Seagrams high and dry
It doesn't have to... we got 1/2 inch in 20 minutes!!!
Will doBlimey!
Keep your head down, old boy!
that is Arkansas featured!!!
That's better...
NW Arkansas is pretty saturated also as Dorothy can testify from the swine waste pit!!!
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Artifex Imaginum
Is that your cousin's arm mopping up the water?
You know him?!?!?!
I hold no hope in getting anyone to believe that Prince Tree was the one poisoning our father and I attempted to poison him to save the king. I am doomed to die with the only clemency possible is from my father whose mind is gone with the slow poisoning or my brother and a snowflake has a better chance of survival in hell. I just wonder how the prince knew. The poison is supposed to be tasteless. Maybe I used too much poison or maybe it reacted with the swill he drinks.
I should not have tried to poison him. I could have easily stabbed him in his heart when he was passed out drunk and take my chances with the court. Instead I caused the Maid Barbaria to suffer a horrible death poisoned on the rack. I have no doubt my brother inspired that move.
-Princess Laetitia
Maid Anna is tried first and is convicted as a conspirator in the plot to kill the king and the prince. Being a commoner she will be hanged the second market day after her conviction in the market square. Like all such convicts, male or female, she will be marched naked through the crowd, have the noose paced around her neck, and be hoisted up to high above the gathered throngs to slowly strangle before the crowd.
Next to be tried is Lady Dana. She too is convicted but as a royal will be beheaded in the tower before a handful of witnesses. Guards tear the smock from her shoulders exposing her breasts. Lady Dana addresses the court saying “I know I have no standing to ask for the mercy of the court or the church but Maid Anna had little or nothing to do with the plot. I beg you to spare her the public hanging and allow her a swift beheading.”
The fair and just Judge Admi confers with Archbishop Wragg in hushed tones punctuated by evil laughter. The judge leans towards Lady Dana and says “The archbishop finds you proposal heartfelt and has proposed a compromise. The maid Anna will be beheaded in the castle courtyard as will you.”
“I accept” Lady Dana says wishing to spare Anna the horror of a public hanging.
“Ah but there is more; you will both face the headsman’s block naked and there will be 50 randomly selected subjects of the kingdom invited to witness your executions” Archbishop Wragg adds. “Do you still accept?”
Lady Dana hesitates at the thought of commoners not just watching her execution but seeing her naked as she is brought to block. The judge clears his throat to signal her he waits for her answer. Lady Dana lowers her head and says “I accept your most generous offer.”
The last to be tried is Princess Laetitia. She is brought to court with her biceps tightly pinioned behind her back lewdly thrusting her ample breasts out for all to see. The barrister begins to read the charges against her when she stops them.
“I and am sure by now the entire kingdom knows the charges against me to which I have confessed to all of them. I accept you decision of guilt and that I am condemned to die. I hope in my last remaining act I can offer my neck to the headman’s block with the dignity befitting my title!”
I am placed in a dungeon chamber to wait for my execution less than a fortnight from now.
-Laetitia
Tree
I should not have tried to poison him. I could have easily stabbed him in his heart when he was passed out drunk and take my chances with the court. Instead I caused the Maid Barbaria to suffer a horrible death poisoned on the rack. I have no doubt my brother inspired that move.
-Princess Laetitia
Maid Anna is tried first and is convicted as a conspirator in the plot to kill the king and the prince. Being a commoner she will be hanged the second market day after her conviction in the market square. Like all such convicts, male or female, she will be marched naked through the crowd, have the noose paced around her neck, and be hoisted up to high above the gathered throngs to slowly strangle before the crowd.
Next to be tried is Lady Dana. She too is convicted but as a royal will be beheaded in the tower before a handful of witnesses. Guards tear the smock from her shoulders exposing her breasts. Lady Dana addresses the court saying “I know I have no standing to ask for the mercy of the court or the church but Maid Anna had little or nothing to do with the plot. I beg you to spare her the public hanging and allow her a swift beheading.”
The fair and just Judge Admi confers with Archbishop Wragg in hushed tones punctuated by evil laughter. The judge leans towards Lady Dana and says “The archbishop finds you proposal heartfelt and has proposed a compromise. The maid Anna will be beheaded in the castle courtyard as will you.”
“I accept” Lady Dana says wishing to spare Anna the horror of a public hanging.
“Ah but there is more; you will both face the headsman’s block naked and there will be 50 randomly selected subjects of the kingdom invited to witness your executions” Archbishop Wragg adds. “Do you still accept?”
Lady Dana hesitates at the thought of commoners not just watching her execution but seeing her naked as she is brought to block. The judge clears his throat to signal her he waits for her answer. Lady Dana lowers her head and says “I accept your most generous offer.”
The last to be tried is Princess Laetitia. She is brought to court with her biceps tightly pinioned behind her back lewdly thrusting her ample breasts out for all to see. The barrister begins to read the charges against her when she stops them.
“I and am sure by now the entire kingdom knows the charges against me to which I have confessed to all of them. I accept you decision of guilt and that I am condemned to die. I hope in my last remaining act I can offer my neck to the headman’s block with the dignity befitting my title!”
I am placed in a dungeon chamber to wait for my execution less than a fortnight from now.
-Laetitia
Tree