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Silent_Water

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Hi,

first I introduce myself: I am new here and I'm the rather scientific type of a madman what seems to be a speciality of Germans, Austrians and some Eastern Europeans. Terribly enough, my family is and was partly Austrian, Hungarian and Romanian and I really still have distant relatives in the former German / Austrian colonized parts of Transsilvania (= almost the same territory as the former German territory of “Siebenbürgen”). If you want to know something about the German / Hungarian / Romanian history there, ask me.

But I would like to ask YOU some questions and to learn more about the reason and history of my obsessions (and yours as well, if possible ;-) ) by writing and showing you some pictures of my own archive. I guess, there have already been similar discussions here but I would also like to ask different questions.

For example:

1. Do you know any literature - possibly really scientific (!?) – about the coherence / context between civilisation and perversions, maybe as a kind of “civilisatory sublimation”? What I mean will be explained further down.

2. When did you first remark that there is a dark side of your mind and was there a single reason like in my case?
In my case, I can tell and show you it exactly: In 1976, August 16, "Time" magazine published a leading article about "Torture as State Policy", which shocked a lot of readers in those times because of the graphic drawings included. There were even complaints about the five drawings but not about the text!

I was a very young subscriber of Time in order to improve my school lessons and I was really shocked, too. I was growing up in a really perfect childhood without any remarkable violence and I was more than shocked. But there was not only shock, there was also the feeling of being fascinated by the graphic material and at first, I was shocked by my own feelings. I thought, I must be crazy because I wanted to see more and not only male victims as in this article but also female ones.
Soon afterwards, I read in a scientific newspaper that in human brains - as in those of many other beings on this planet - the most receptive brain segments for recognition and acceptance of violence are in the same area as the receptive segments for sexual attraction. The scientists explained it as typical remains of the times when our more animal-like ancestors possibly needed aggressions and brutality when they may have fought for the females in rutting-seasons.
Hey, I was really somehow glad to read that! (So, it was also not an "unfortunate accident" that the monks of the middle ages as a whole were often the best artists (sublimation!) and at the same time the best inventors of torture techniques in witch-hunt proceedings.)
So I could explain my own desires for looking at torture pictures as an easily explicable human atavism and a typical perversion of human beings in times of high civilization.
Maybe, I thought, I am even more civilized than others because I am the always friendly and helpful guy who will always help old people to cross the streets.
Later, I was surprised how much this article engraved on my thoughts and later, when I tried to calm down some aggressions, I drew almost automatically and more and more perfect pictures from my nightmares. In that way, I am really similar to H.R. Giger, illustrator of the alien monster in the Alien movie series with Sigourney Weaver. He once said in an interview on TV, he always had these pictures in his nightmares and they did no longer haunt him at night, when he painted in reality these alien and not only extraterrestrial monsters at day-time.
So, maybe I will show more but on the other hand, I am really busy in my profession and I must apologize because I cannot post or answer every day or even every week.
Thank you for your interest and your answers.

Silent_Water
 

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OK, I have read now a lot in this linked thread - I usually can read very fast - and I have a high esteem for the personal descriptions there about the preferences or obsessions of interesting persons there but I got the impression that no explanation there really fits for me. Most of the crucifixion desires have something to do with the influence of Christian churches, especially catholic influences. I am not really interested in crucifixions and I hope this will you not make sad. I was raised in a mixture of protestant and Lutheranian households without my parents being really religious oder going to church regularly and I was very glad about that because I found it always degrading to kneel - even as a child when Catholics did that in their churches, I did not really understand why because God was obviously not always there. It seems, I was the born heretic from childhood on - doubting and questioning everything. :eyebrow2:
I am much more interested in the reason why I am - knowing my peaceful background in a peaceful society - so obssessed in torture.
My explanation is sometimes - only sometimes, because I am also questioning my own explanations :shakehead: - much more stranger than most of "us Christian" people are willing to understand:

1. I "sometimes" really believe that the human consciousness can be separated from the body in case of death. One example is the re-animation after heart-attacks because when "the line to death" is crossed, the body obviously feels no longer pain and relaxes completely. When the patient is re-animated by a defibrillator or s.th. like that, the pain and spasms are back immediately without any delay or retardation. The patients later often remember that moment and say that they had no more pain at all but they were still conscious and sometimes after this moment, the so-called "out-of-body-experiences" are starting.
My point in this explanation is that no doctor, no medical treatment, no endorphine works that fast in a second like a switch-on / switch-off the pain. So, I guess, there is really line between life and death and people can remember that line even after they have crossed it. That means that human consciousness can survive the death of the body. I do not know how long or in which shape or if it is the same as "the soul" but I really think, this is the case.

2. If you accept this case, your consciousness may not only survive one death in one body.

3. I once met a protestant priest who was convinced he lived already at least once as a "Ger - Man", that means a "Ger" once some thousand years ago was a spear for hunting used by ancient German tribes and he was absolutely obsessed by the idea of running through a forest holding his right hand up ready to throw the spear after a deer he was hunting. I also liked this idea somehow and since then, I ask myself if there is a kind of collective subconsciousness for men and women to like postures which may have been the normal kind of living for ten-thousands of years or if we sometimes have flashbacks into former existances of our possibly partly immortal consciousnesses.

4. If you accept the idea of an at least partly immortal subconsciousness, some of our today-obsessions could be flashbacks to the most challenging, most shocking or most compelling situations which our immortal (?) (sub-?)consciousness might once have experienced: Death at the cross, death at the stakes, killing other people in times of warfare etc.

Maybe, I am totally wrong, but then, please prove me the opposite and please start by point 1. by telling me an endorphine which works in less than a second like an electrical switch.
:eaea:
 
I am not really interested in crucifixions and I hope this will you not make sad.
It doesn't make me sad, as I share your POV.

I think humans have a biological need for physical challenges. In prehistoric times, we got plenty just finding food and avoiding predators, but now, we live in climate controlled houses and drive around in climate controlled cars, so we must seek them out. Look at the popularity of extreme sports. A marathon is not enough, we must have an ultramarathon or triathlon (and remember Phidippedes died after running from Marathon to Athens). I myself completed a hiking challenge that started as a tiny group and now numbers in the many thousands. So I think that is part of the way our brains are wired.
 
Before I read and comment on the time article you shared, I want to write down what I think is up with me. I’ll be thinking and typing at the same time, like therapy.

It’s funny to me that the first nude images, even if the naughty bits were covered, I ever saw came from biblical material, either the DK Children’s bible I had or a children’s bible tales cartoon with puppet song numbers. It was almost subversive the way they teased my very, very young brain.

At the same time I remember not being able to distinguish between men and women, and having desires for both, so that I could look at an image of Jesus before pilot in a loin cloth that looked like it was about to fall off and get excited. I’m not sure I am allowed to say this, but this was during a time period where I pushed down on my little fella to get physical pleasure.

Since growing up, I unfortunately only have an affinity for half the human race, and it’s the half that can’t grow beard. But I think I transferred what I saw in those images to women, the innocence in the garden of Eden, Standing naked before pilot and the cities populace who codemns her to death, and being executed by that particular method, and left hanging for days.

That’s one side of it.

But the other side had to do with justice. My father is a workers comp lawyer. For further clarification, it does not mean that he helps employee’s defraud their company. When his clients get injured at work, he argues with insurance company lawyers over what percentage they are permanently disabled, which will determine how much money they get in a lump sum and in future medical. I’ll try to avoid too many details, other than to say that it is a miserable system as far as the workers are concerned.

There’s one case with a train conductor who hit a bicyclist who was trying to cross the track, and Metro (his employer) blamed him, told him the cyclist died, and fired him, but hired him back at partial salary. He has a psychological injury that impairs his ability to operate a train, and has to do menial jobs, but can’t seek workers comp for a psychological injury. Two years later, he’s called in to testify on behalf of metro because the cyclist, who he was surprised to find was still alive, was suing the company. There’s are hundreds of more stories like this, from a guy who gets hit on the head with rotted wood while repairing a house and having the guy who hired him say he was an independent contractor, to an Amazon employee being thrown from her forklift because the company took the brakes out of all their warehouse vehicles for “safety reasons.” None of these stories are sexy, and none of the victims are young and attractive. But these things still effect me deeply.

I’m still taking college classes, as I’ve been doing for the last 10 years, but when I eventually do “Grow Up” I want to do something that has to do with the pursuit of justice. But, as I’ve learned by watching my pop, the pursuit of justice is a pursuit of failure.

That’s where BDSM/Crux/Snuff stories/images comes in. It’s a strange catharsis, that works in the same was a tradgedy does for me. The Heroine is righteous, though may be flawed in some aspects, but never a rich spoiled brat or someone who “deserves it.” We follow the Heroine as she tries to achieve her noble goal, fails, and is punished for it through torture, humiliation, and execution. It’s a place I go to when a political election or vote doesn’t go the way I believe it should, when I watch a documentary about people being taken advantage of and it seems impossible to do anything about. It’s a place I go to when the Patriots smash my beloved Chargers into itty bitty bits, the event that inspired my Red Stripe story. It’s essentially the way I deal with what Albert Camus would call the “Absurd nature of the world.”

It’s fascinating that you brought up the connection between being interested in this particular kink, and believing in life after death. More days than not, I do believe that something lives on after we die, and on days I think there is only nothingness at the end I get agitated and depressed and have no interest in being flippant about death. I think this place has help a lot. The Crux girls like Barb and Messa and Eulalia have been cruicified and hung multiple times as have many others, yet they still here. They are essentially the Crux-forums time lords.

So I think that might be it. I’m here to purge myself, to seek catharsis, in the form of a good looking and good hearted naked woman being persecuted.
 
Answer to "Windar":
In principle, you are right but I have to add two explanations.
(You will see, unfortunately I sometimes suffer from the in German so-called "Klugscheißer-Syndrom" = probably in US-English the "smart-ass-syndrome".) Pheidippides - as we spell the name in German - has not a historical proven existence and even if he really existed, he already should have taken part in the battle before his famous Marathon running so he could really have been exhausted to the death.
The other point is that human beings also seem to have a desire to find a balance or compensation for their profession or their position. In carnival processions in Germany, you can sometimes see people dressed as kings who are poor in reality and you can see beggar costumes of people who are millionnaires in reality.
Or another example: There once was a famous German boxer and catcher, a really big man with "Hände so groß wie Klodeckel" (= "hands as big as toilet seat tops") and he was at the same time one of the most famous German collectors of glass & China porcellaine miniatures.
So, I am in reality the most helpful and friendly person you can imagine, but in my imagination, my nightmares and in my drawings, I am on the opposite a really dangerous man - just because my mind likes to find a compensation to my extreme friendliness and I am sometimes afraid what kind of human being I could have been with a completely different education in a completely different German society like 90 years ago.
 
Answer to "jacksjg89":

Thank you very much for your interesting description.

I would like to add that I sometimes see the only justification for myself of being a human being is trying to make this often terrible world a fairer place with more justice in it.
But you or I never know how good you or I are living as long you don't see the situation in places of the world with less lucky conditions which can also change faster than everybody can imagine - by natural catastrophies or by human madness.
(By the way, I sometimes would really like to have an arguing discussion with God if he exists about some special natural and personified catastrophies in history - beginning with the 1st Nov. 1755 earthquake of Lissabon which caused the "Era of Enlightenment" by making the Theodicy problem obvious and ending by talking about some creatures like Hitler or Stalin.)

There is no real certainty, safety or security in this life and by knowing this, one has to try to get through this life with as much decency and dignity as possible, helping other with less luck as good as you can by also knowing that you cannot save the world alone.

On the other hand, I know for my person that I was highly privileged by chance, simply by being born at that special time in a again rising country like Germany which changed extremely during the last 100 years and for me, compared to most other places in the world, this center of Europe with nowadays mostly friendly nations close around us in peace for now 75 years is close to paradise for me, no matter if there are financial or other problems bothering me - but I also know it is close to paradise only right now and no one knows how the future will be during the next 100 years but right now it is the best place of living especially for me.
(OK, Switzerland or Norway might have been even more closer to paradise for me, but you can never have the absolute ideal situation.)
 
Right now, your answer "jackjg89" and my reply brought me to the idea that there is also a connection between the catastrophy of Lissabon in 1755 and "BDSM" until today in this forum, because up to 1755, the Europeans as a whole lived in the "almost-certainty" that there is a caring God who will punish "wrong-doers" and all their possible perversions, that kings are on their thrones because of the will of God and so on.
But the 1st November 1755 changed almost everything and in my opinion was also one reason for the French Revolution.
Lissabon was on that morning hit by the perfect natural and incredibly planned looking overkill. It was "all-saints-day" and the churches were full with people when between 9.05 and 9.15 o'clock the earth shook so much that almost all churches and bigger houses collapsed completely, burying all the faithful believers in the churches, killing ten-thousands of inhabitants at once. Others in wooden houses died in the sudden fires which mostly were caused by broken oil lamps and candles. People who managed to get to the big free places at the harbor were hit about half an hour later by a tsunami of about 3 metres height. At least 25.000 people were killed during the first 30 minutes but estimates of all victims go up to more than 100.000 persons during the following 5 days. The surviving king and his noblesse tried to keep order by martial law but there were all kinds of imaginable crimes and also proven cases of cannibalism during the following four weeks.
The reports from Lissabon shocked the whole of Europe and philosophers like Voltaire wrote sad and satirical stories like "Candide" in which they tried to show that statements like the one of the German philosopher Leibniz who said we would be living "in the best of all possible worlds" are complete nonsense.
A feeling of uncertainty came across Europe: God might not really exist or mankind does not interest him any more. And if God does not exist, what is the justification of kings to govern their nations rather bad than good? And moreover, if there is no one anymore who will punish crimes after life, why could one not commit any crime - also and especially sexual crimes - one would like to commit?
And here, it is interesting that Voltaire was a personal friend of the father of that Marquis de Sade, who must have known Voltaire and also Montesquieu because they were guests in the palace of the noble family of the de Sades, when this man, after whom "Sadism" has its name until today, was also there taking part in or at least hearing the philosophical discussions between his father and Voltaire - but probably taking his own and false conclusions for his own dark sexual desires:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marquis_de_Sade
So, this special catastrophy of 1755 influenced much more of our history up to now and also here in this forum than most of us might think, I would say.
 
Hi,

first I introduce myself: I am new here and I'm the rather scientific type of a madman what seems to be a speciality of Germans, Austrians and some Eastern Europeans. Terribly enough, my family is and was partly Austrian, Hungarian and Romanian and I really still have distant relatives in the former German / Austrian colonized parts of Transsilvania (= almost the same territory as the former German territory of “Siebenbürgen”). If you want to know something about the German / Hungarian / Romanian history there, ask me.

But I would like to ask YOU some questions and to learn more about the reason and history of my obsessions (and yours as well, if possible ;-) ) by writing and showing you some pictures of my own archive. I guess, there have already been similar discussions here but I would also like to ask different questions.

For example:

1. Do you know any literature - possibly really scientific (!?) – about the coherence / context between civilisation and perversions, maybe as a kind of “civilisatory sublimation”? What I mean will be explained further down.

2. When did you first remark that there is a dark side of your mind and was there a single reason like in my case?
In my case, I can tell and show you it exactly: In 1976, August 16, "Time" magazine published a leading article about "Torture as State Policy", which shocked a lot of readers in those times because of the graphic drawings included. There were even complaints about the five drawings but not about the text!

I was a very young subscriber of Time in order to improve my school lessons and I was really shocked, too. I was growing up in a really perfect childhood without any remarkable violence and I was more than shocked. But there was not only shock, there was also the feeling of being fascinated by the graphic material and at first, I was shocked by my own feelings. I thought, I must be crazy because I wanted to see more and not only male victims as in this article but also female ones.
Soon afterwards, I read in a scientific newspaper that in human brains - as in those of many other beings on this planet - the most receptive brain segments for recognition and acceptance of violence are in the same area as the receptive segments for sexual attraction. The scientists explained it as typical remains of the times when our more animal-like ancestors possibly needed aggressions and brutality when they may have fought for the females in rutting-seasons.
Hey, I was really somehow glad to read that! (So, it was also not an "unfortunate accident" that the monks of the middle ages as a whole were often the best artists (sublimation!) and at the same time the best inventors of torture techniques in witch-hunt proceedings.)
So I could explain my own desires for looking at torture pictures as an easily explicable human atavism and a typical perversion of human beings in times of high civilization.
Maybe, I thought, I am even more civilized than others because I am the always friendly and helpful guy who will always help old people to cross the streets.
Later, I was surprised how much this article engraved on my thoughts and later, when I tried to calm down some aggressions, I drew almost automatically and more and more perfect pictures from my nightmares. In that way, I am really similar to H.R. Giger, illustrator of the alien monster in the Alien movie series with Sigourney Weaver. He once said in an interview on TV, he always had these pictures in his nightmares and they did no longer haunt him at night, when he painted in reality these alien and not only extraterrestrial monsters at day-time.
So, maybe I will show more but on the other hand, I am really busy in my profession and I must apologize because I cannot post or answer every day or even every week.
Thank you for your interest and your answers.

Silent_Water

From a psychological point of view I would like to mention what Carl Jung referred to as the Shadow Self. The Shadow Self is basically the dark side within each person. Jung believed this was a part of every person and that to deny that it exists would create more problems. It is better to recognize it and accept it as part of who you are. By doing so you could balance it with the other parts that make up your psyche. Another psychologist who I knew for a brief period of time was Eugene Taylor who wrote a book called Shadow Culture which was about the Shadow Self. If you would like to explore this topic further I would recommend that you research Jung and Taylor to get a more in depth understanding of these concepts.
 
Another Jungian concept is the archetype, which as I understand it is a potent symbol of many-layered, complex meaning, that resonates with some deep driving forces within our subconscious, and are rooted in the Collective Unconscious. They feature in our dreams and fantasies, they are the stuff of stories, myths and legends. Archetypes that are very powerful for me include, of course, my body sacrificed on the cross, but also my favourite myth of Andromeda chained to her rock awaiting the sea-monster, and other 'sacrificial' stories and symbols. Also the hunt, where I am the prey of male hunters - though without any Jungian explanation, that might very well be programmed into my genes from way back in evolution.
 
Thank you very much for both postings before. Jung seems to be an inexhaustible source for explanations of the subconscious or the dark side of the human mind and also for many other aspects of still unexplained mysteries. I once was and I in principle I still am very interested in explanations of coincidences in human life, which sometimes look very deliberately planned and Jung had also some experiments with the Chinese I-Ging which went into this direction.
Concerning my own obsessions:
In some way, compared to some pictures in the forums here, I am still a bit restricted in my obsessions. For example, I seem to be searching the aesthetics in torture like the photographer Andres Serrano seemed to look for it. He made photo series with volunteers in torture postures:
https://www.vice.com/de/article/qbm...thetik-und-schrecken-verdammt-nah-beieinander
In this article, one of the headlines is: At (correct preposition?) torture, aesthetics and terror are lying damned close together
In my case and in my mind, I must be the "softy torturer" because I cannot see blood and I sometimes even felt pity for my pencil-drawn victims. My torture victims usually have no obvious marks on their skin and no visible injuries. So, you can imagine how my drawings are looking like and which ones are my preferred torture techniques. On the other hand, in my imaginations I like to have women tied or completely under control and my drawings are sometimes inspired by photos or artwork from more famous artists, which I sometimes alienated or colored like these ones from Bessonov and Nobuyoshi Araki. By the way, if you know that there is a copyright on these pictures, please delete them. On the other hand, I changed them by size and by coloring them. These pictures only existed in black-white before as far as I know, so in some countries this also changes the copyright claims because they are no more in their original form or shape.
 

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Another Jungian concept is the archetype, which as I understand it is a potent symbol of many-layered, complex meaning, that resonates with some deep driving forces within our subconscious, and are rooted in the Collective Unconscious. They feature in our dreams and fantasies, they are the stuff of stories, myths and legends. Archetypes that are very powerful for me include, of course, my body sacrificed on the cross, but also my favourite myth of Andromeda chained to her rock awaiting the sea-monster, and other 'sacrificial' stories and symbols. Also the hunt, where I am the prey of male hunters - though without any Jungian explanation, that might very well be programmed into my genes from way back in evolution.

Thank you for your description and also interesting for me, so I would like to ask 1 - 2 1/2 questions. :eyebrow2:
In what kind do / did you encounter these archtypes?
Do you only like the imagination of being Andromeda or did you indeed have dreams of being Andromeda or a victim / prey of some other kind?
 
Another Jungian concept is the archetype, which as I understand it is a potent symbol of many-layered, complex meaning, that resonates with some deep driving forces within our subconscious, and are rooted in the Collective Unconscious. They feature in our dreams and fantasies, they are the stuff of stories, myths and legends. Archetypes that are very powerful for me include, of course, my body sacrificed on the cross, but also my favourite myth of Andromeda chained to her rock awaiting the sea-monster, and other 'sacrificial' stories and symbols. Also the hunt, where I am the prey of male hunters - though without any Jungian explanation, that might very well be programmed into my genes from way back in evolution.

Within the last few statements you made Eulalia it sounds like they are needs that need to be fulfilled to satisfy your own personal needs. There is another theory written by Abraham Maslow in which every human being has needs to be fulfilled. Some of these needs include belonginess, physical, esteem, and self actualization. The last need of self actualization is where one achieves their highest potential. The thing about all of these needs is that they fluctuate over time depending on what is needed during a person's lifetime. I would suggest looking him up.
Koltko-Rivera, M. E. (2006). Rediscovering the later version of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs: Self-transcendence and opportunities for theory, research, and unification. Review of General Psychology, 10 (4), 302-317. Doi: 10.1037/1089-2680.10.4.302.
 
Hm, in my archive I found an older story, illustrated first by the US-artist Bishop (as far as I know) and alienated later by me. I found this "short story" so "friendly devlish" that I once translated it into German. I have already posted it about 15 years ago at another forum but there it disappeared after some updates of them.
So I repeat it here in German because I would not like to separate the continuation story which is now on the run there in the German section of this forum.
First, the old version in English and behind that, the German version of which I once was told, it was so "successful" that at least one German reader had to go to the bathroom before finishing it because of its "elevating" effect for him.

"A Shocking Wait"
by Gamma


She stood, balanced, though just barely. By force of will, the naked girl tried to remain absolutely motionless. But to do that was almost impossible. It was the point of her bondage, of course.
She stood erect, her legs spread wide by a metal bar strapped between her ankles forcing them apart. Her arms were pulled behind her back, strapped together at her elbows and wrists, forcing her breast forward.
Her long blonde hair cascaded down her bound arms all the way to her slim waist. She was gagged, her mouth stuffed with a penis gag and covered by a thick leather strap. Otherwise, she was completely nude. That was the standard stuff, in and of itself arousing as it silenced and commanded her naked body, offering her charms in wanton invitation. But there was more tonight - much more!
On each of her erect nipples was a small spring-clamp. These connected to a thin leather strap, which then connected together in a heavier strap. This went up to the ceiling rafter and over a pulley there. At the other end of this strap from her nipples, dangling just a few feet in front of the girl, was a metal weight. It rested no more than an inch above a box with a metal plate on its top. In fact, if the girl weren't leaning back and away, her taut breasts pulling at the strap, the weight would rest on the box. The girl arched herself backward, trembling, struggling to keep the weight away from the box. She had good reason to. From the box ran a wire connected to a pole. The pole jutted up from the floor, gleaming metal. Its end, a dildo, was planted deep in the girl's cunt. It was thick and stretched the lips of her pussy wide. It was shiny with her juices. If she slumped forward, relaxing her pose, the weight would drop down onto the box, completing an electrical circuit. When the circuit was completed, the box would send a mild shock to the dildo - just a few volts but enough to make the girl squirm from its fiery bite. If the weight stayed on the box, the current would continue for twenty seconds, stop for twenty seconds, then start again, and so on, until the connection was broken.
So she had a choice, this girl in bondage. She could yank at the strap, causing the clamps to bite at her nipples, or relax and send the shock ripping into her cunt. When that happened, she found that her writhings on the end of her perch set her pussy aflame!
She would buck and squirm, and the weight would bob up and down and nick the plate, and then the shock would hit her like a whip lash.
But she couldn't take much of the shock, so, in spite of her arousal, she would arch her naked body, pulling the weight away from the box. Back and forth she would sway, slumping from exhaustion, moaning into her gag when she heard the clank of the metal plates making contact, then steeling herself for the shock to her cunt. Her body glistened with sweat. Her hair flailed about her as she shook her head and bit down on the rubber penis in her mouth and willed herself into a balanced posture.
The man stood in the doorway watching her. She blushed in shame when he entered, then lost her concentration and slumped forward. Then she arched beautifully and wailed in desperation as the current pulsed into her pussy. She was a hot bitch, naked and bound and whipped into a frenzy by his clever torment. And the fact that she herself determined what happened, in a helpless, tormented way, only added to her stimulation.
He was contemplating a new addition to her bondage torment. He rummaged through a dresser and came up with two small boxes, also dangling wires. He connected these wires to two small jacks in the bigger box, then bend down between his captive's splayed legs.
"Up on your toes," he commanded. The girl moaned but obeyed, arching up on her toes till her heels cleared the floor. The man slipped one of the smaller boxes under each heel. Each box had a small button on its top, no more than a half inch from the girl's foot. If she dropped down from her toes, her heel would push the button. "Better stay as you are, my sweet," the man teased. "If either heel touches those buttons, it'll up the voltage to your cunt another notch. Keep your feet down and it'll keep upping the current."
The girl groaned deeply in frustration and agony as she heard this. It was hard to stay on her toes with her legs spread so wide and with her torso arched. But she would try. She didn't want the shocks to get any worse.
"It's ten o'clock," the man said. "What do you say I leave you here until - oh, I don't know - how about midnight?"
The girl looked at him in horror, shook her head no, and moaned into her gag. She wasn't watching the weight as she did this, and it dropped and touched the box. The shock hit her, and she snapped to attention and arched backwards in response. Too far backwards. She got her weight back and dropped off her tiptoes, and her heels - both of them - hit the buttons. She squirmed anew as the current surged a little higher until, after twenty long seconds, it stopped. She was panting, her breath ragged and nostrils flaring. Even though the current had stopped, she kept squirming on the dildo, aroused, so hot she didn't care for anything except the orgasm about to burst through her loins.
Her writhings took her forward again,, and the weight touched down. This shock pushed her over the brink. She would not be denied. Head back wailing into the gag, fingers scratching at her ass, her hips twitching, she came with an all-consuming violence. Wave after wave rippled through her body, which bucked and writhed in erotic abandon.
The man admired the naked beauty spasming before him. Her head was thrown back, and she shook it back and forth as she came. Her blonde mane floated behind her. Her eyes were closed, and a deep, low moan came from her gagged mouth. Her breasts heaved and jiggled, the weight scraped along the box, and her torso writhed delightfully. Her loins pumped furiously at the dildo-pole, her juices dripping down its shiny thick length. She was a spectacle of unchecked eroticism. She was beautiful. She was his.
When her climax subsided, she slumped again and fell heavily onto her heels, only to arch upwards again when yet another shock hit. She looked up through hooded eyes, her mind and body saturated with the intensity of her pain and pleasure.
Her master smiled at her, flicked off the lights, and closed the door, leaving her to her aroused frenzy of torment.
"Until one", he thought to himself. "I’ll leave her there until one o’clock." By then, he knew she’d be ready for his next little game.


"A Shocking Wait"
von Gamma


translated by / übersetzt von
Silent_Water


“Eine schockierende Warterei”

Sie balancierte, stehend und völlig entblößt. Mit ihrem ganzen Willen bemühte sich die schlanke junge Frau, völlig unbeweglich zu bleiben. Aber das war fast unmöglich. Ursache dafür war natürlich ihre Bondage-Fesselung.
Sie stand aufrecht, ihre Schenkel weit gespreizt durch eine Metallstange, die zwischen ihren Knöcheln festgeschnallt war und ihre Beine auseinander zwangen. Ihre Arme waren auf ihrem Rücken festgebunden, fest zusammengeschnallt bei ihren Ellbogen und ihren Handgelenken, ihr Oberkörper und ihre straffen Brüste dadurch nach vorne gezwungen.
Ihr langes blondes Haar fiel den ganzen Weg zu ihrer schlanken Taille in Kaskaden über ihre Arme herab. Sie war geknebelt, ihr Mund mit einem Penisknebel gestopft und abgedeckt durch einen dicken Ledergurt. Ansonsten war sie vollkommen nackt. Das war die übliche Situation als Sex-Sklavin, die sie schon gewohnt war, sie zum Schweigen brachte, ihren nackten Körper kontrollierte und ihren sexuellen Zauber in lüsterner Einladung ihrem Mann, Herrn und Meister darbot. Aber es gab heute Abend mehr, viel mehr!
An jeder ihrer aufgerichteten Brustwarzen war eine kleine Feder-Klammer befestigt. Diese war verbunden mit einem dünnen Ledergurt, der sich dann mit einem schwereren Gurt in Verbindung setzte. Dieser verlief nach oben zu einer Stange und dort über eine Rolle. Am anderen Ende von diesem an ihren Brustwarzen befestigten Gurt baumelte ein Metallgewicht, nur einen halben Meter vor der Nase der nackten Evastochter. Das Gewicht ruhte kaum mehr als einen Zoll über einer Kiste mit einem Metallteller auf seiner Spitze.
In der Tat, wenn die Frau sich nicht rückwärts neigte und mit ihren straffen Brüsten am Gurt zog, sank das Gewicht auf die Kiste. Die junge Frau krümmte sich rückwärts und zitterte vor Mühe, das Gewicht von der Kiste fernzuhalten. Sie hatte guten Grund dazu. Von der Kiste lief ein Draht zu einer Stange, mit der er verbunden war. Die Stange ragte senkrecht aus dem Boden heraus und war aus glänzendem Metall. Auf ihrem Ende befand sich ein beweglicher Dildo, tief in die Vagina der Nackten gepflanzt. Er war dick und ihre Schamlippen wurden von ihm weit gespreizt. Der Dildo glänzte bereits von ihren Körpersäften. Wenn sie sich vorwärts neigte und ihre Pose lockerte, fiel das Gewicht auf die Kiste und vervollständigte eine elektrische Schaltung. Wenn der elektrische Kontakt hergestellt wurde, sandte die Kiste einen sanften Schock zum Dildo; nur einige Volt, aber genug, um die Frau dazu zu bringen, sich unter seinem feurigen Biss zu winden. Wenn das Gewicht auf der Kiste blieb, würde sich der Strom für zwanzig Sekunden fortsetzen, zwanzig Sekunden unterbrochen werden, wieder beginnen und dann so weiter, bis die Verbindung unterbrochen wurde.
So hatte sie dennoch ihre Wahl, diese schöne Nackte in technischer Sex-Sklaverei. Sie konnte sich nach hinten neigen, bis die Gurte an ihren Brüsten zogen und dadurch die Klammern in ihre Brustwarzen beißen ließen – oder sie konnte ihren Oberkörper entspannen, aber dafür einen Elektroschock in ihre Vagina schießen lassen. Wenn das passierte, dachte sie, ihre Scheide würde in Flammen lodern.
Sie würde bocken, sich winden und krümmen, das Gewicht würde auf und ab wippen und den Teller langsam einkerben, und immer würde der Schock sie wie eine Peitsche in ihrem weiblichsten Körperteil treffen.
Aber sie konnte trotz ihrer Erregung nicht viel vom Schock ertragen, sie würde ihren nackten Körper krümmen und das Gewicht weg von der Kiste ziehen. Hin und her würde sie schwanken und vor Erschöpfung wieder nach vorne fallen, in ihren Knebel stöhnen, wenn sie durch das Rasseln von den Metalltellern wieder Kontakt aufnehmen hörte und sie sich dann wieder für den Schock in ihrer Scheide wappnete. Ihr Körper funkelte vor Schweiß. Ihr Haar wehte mit ihr herum, als sie ihren Kopf schüttelte und vor Schmerz auf den Gummipenis in ihrem Mund biss, während sie sich um ihr Gleichgewicht mühte.
Sie bemerkte den Mann, der in der Türöffnung stand und sie beobachtete. Sie errötete vor Scham, als er zu ihr hineinging, dann verlor sie ihre Konzentration und bewegte sich vorwärts. Dann wölbte sie sich schön wie ein Bogen und stöhnte in Verzweiflung als der Strom durch ihre Vagina pulsierte. Sie war jetzt wie eine heiße Hündin, splitternackt unterwegs und flitzte durch seine kluge Quälerei in eine wilde Aufregung. Und die Tatsache, dass sie selbst auf eine hilflose, gequälte Weise entscheiden konnte, wo sie der Schmerz traf, trug sogar noch zu ihrer Erregung bei!
Er zog einen neuen Zusatz zu ihrer Qual in Erwägung. Er stöberte durch eine Kommode und kam mit zwei kleinen Kästchen zurück, von denen auch Drähte hingen. Er verband diese Drähte mit zwei kleinen Hebevorrichtungen in der größeren Kiste und hockte sich dann zwischen die gespreizten Beine seiner Gefangenen hinunter.
„Auf deine Zehen, böses Mädchen!“, befahl er. Sein nacktes „Mädchen“ stöhnte, aber es gehorchte und wölbte sich auf ihren Zehen aufwärts bis ihre Fersen den Boden nicht mehr berührten. Der Mann setzte eins von den kleinen Kästchen unter jeder Ferse ab. Jedes hatte auf seiner Spitze einen kleinen Knopf, kaum mehr als ein halber Zoll vom Fuß der schönen Nackten entfernt. Wenn sie ihren Fuß senkte, würde ihre Ferse den Knopf berühren. „Du bleibst jetzt besser, wie du bist, meine Süße“, scherzte der Mann. „Wenn eine von beiden Fersen jene Knöpfe berührt, wird die Spannung in deiner Muschi um eine Einheit erhöht. Behältst du die Füße unten, wird die Spannung jede Sekunde höher!“
Die Frau stöhnte tief in Frustration und Qual, als sie dieses hörte. Es war schwierig, mit ihren weit gespreizten Beinen auf ihren Zehen stehen zu bleiben und mit ihren Torso so weit nach hinten zu wölben. Aber sie würde sich bemühen. Sie wollte nicht, dass die Elektroschocks noch stärker in ihrer Scheide brannten.
„Es ist zehn Uhr“, sagte der Mann. „Was sagst du, wenn ich dich erst mal hier allein lasse bis …, ach, ich weiß nicht, … wie wär’s mit Mitternacht?“
Die Frau schaute ihn entsetzt an, schüttelte ihren Kopf zum deutlichen „nein“, und stöhnte in ihren Knebel. Sie sah das Gewicht nicht an, als sie dieses tat, und es fiel und berührte die Kiste. Der Schock traf sie und machte sie mit einem Schlag wieder auf das Gewicht aufmerksam. Zur Antwort neigte sie sich rückwärts. Zu weit rückwärts. Sie sank auf ihre Fersen und beide trafen die Knöpfe. Sie wand sich erneut, als die Strömung plötzlich ein wenig höher anstieg und nach zwanzig langen Sekunden aufhörte. Sie keuchte, ihr Atem kam stoßweise und ihre Nasenlöcher bebten vor Erregung. Obwohl der Strom aufgehört hatte, fuhr sie fort, sich auf dem Dildo zu winden, erregt und so heiß, dass sie nichts mehr außer dem Orgasmus fühlte, der durch ihre Lenden zu brechen begann.
Ihre Windungen und Drehungen ließen sie sich nach vorne beugen und das Gewicht berührte wieder den elektrischen Kontakt. Dieser Schock brachte sie endgültig über die Scheidelinie der normalen Bondage-Erotik. Sie war nicht mehr aufzuhalten. Mit zurückgeworfenem Kopf wimmerte und quietschte sie in den Knebel, ihre Hüften zuckten, die Finger und Daumen ihrer gefesselten Hände kratzten an, auf und zwischen ihren Po-Backen, ihr Orgasmus kam endlich mit einer alles verschlingenden und hinnehmenden Gewalt. Welle auf Welle schoss durch ihren Körper, der sich in erotischer Wildheit aufbäumte.
Der Mann bewunderte die nackte Schönheit, die sich vor ihm in sexuellen Krämpfen wand. Ihr Kopf wurde zurückgeworfen, und sie schüttelte ihn hin und her, als sie zum Orgasmus kam. Ihre blonde Mähne schwang hinter ihr. Ihre Augen waren geschlossen, und ein langsames, tiefes Stöhnen kam aus ihrem geknebelten Mund. Ihre Brüste hoben sich und tanzten hin und her; das Gewicht kratzte wieder an der Kiste und ihr Torso krümmte sich wunderbar. Ihre Lenden pumpten wütend auf dem Dildo-Pfahl, während ihre Säfte an seiner metallisch glänzenden dicken Länge heruntertropften. Sie war ein Schauspiel unkontrollierter Erotik. Sie war schön. Sie war sein Besitz.
Als ihr Höhepunkt nachließ, fiel sie wieder schwer auf ihre Fersen, nur um sich wieder empor zu wölben, als sie ein weiterer elektrischer Schlag streckte. Sie blickte durch verschleierte Augen auf, ihr Verstand und ihr Körper gesättigt mit der Intensität ihrer Ekstase.
Ihr Meister lächelte sie an, schnippte das Licht aus und schloss die Tür, um sie wieder der wilden Erregung ihrer Qual zu überlassen.
„Bis eins“, dachte er sich. „Ich werde sie bis ein Uhr hier lassen.“ Er wusste, dass sie bis dahin für sein nächstes kleines Spiel bereit wäre.
 

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Sorry for repeating this post from another thread but I must find it easily again, when I am gone away for some weeks.
As I said before, I am very interested in actual international politics and satires about all the madness of today so I like people like him very much:
So, something completely different for the intellectual satire-lovers between us, concerned about torture as state policy in the future. There is a German satirist with the name Andreas Rebers, who tells about himself, he would have liked to become a psychiatrist until he remarked his two psychiatrists were much, much crazier than he himself, so he started a career as intellectual stand-up-comedian.
In one of his programs, he remarked there are more and more presidents around the world in recent times, who are again talking in favor of torture like the Catholic great inquisitor in Middle Ages, e.g. Trump in the US, Bolsonaro in Brazil, Duterte in the Philippines, Erdogan in Turkey and we don't even want to talk about rather closed states like North-Korea or Saudi Arabia.
On the other hand, when there sometimes erupts violence at their political assemblies of these presidents, at least their speakers say, these presidents were always against violence. This is at least very inconsequent thinking of them because they also like torture.
So, Rebers said, with all these presidents around he cannot understand why there still is so much political correctness in hatred and intolerance towards violence. Why do we mostly still have some negative feelings towards violence when a majority of their people likes these presidents? When all these presidents and their very intelligent supporters once would have been beaten up or tortured at the parrot's perch at the right time in their lives, they could tell us much, much more about the beauty of violence and torture.
But unfortunately, human beings are very inconsequent.
This is one part of Andreas Reber's scenes and I think he starts here by the song "Fire, fire, light my baby!" (=> "old Pakistanian musical hit" or so)
 
Within the last few statements you made Eulalia it sounds like they are needs that need to be fulfilled to satisfy your own personal needs. There is another theory written by Abraham Maslow in which every human being has needs to be fulfilled. Some of these needs include belonginess, physical, esteem, and self actualization. The last need of self actualization is where one achieves their highest potential. The thing about all of these needs is that they fluctuate over time depending on what is needed during a person's lifetime. I would suggest looking him up.
Koltko-Rivera, M. E. (2006). Rediscovering the later version of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs: Self-transcendence and opportunities for theory, research, and unification. Review of General Psychology, 10 (4), 302-317. Doi: 10.1037/1089-2680.10.4.302.
Indeed, I'm familiar with the (very interesting) thoughts of Abraham Maslow.
A Jewish Buddhist, got to be good!
 
Recently, I found this following video and - as usual - I am shocked how much I like it during the last 2 minutes. As far as I understand, they are speaking Hungarian in this video. Am I wrong? And why are there so many - hrm - "interesting" videos coming from Hungary during the last decade?
 
Answer to "Windar":
In principle, you are right but I have to add two explanations.
(You will see, unfortunately I sometimes suffer from the in German so-called "Klugscheißer-Syndrom" = probably in US-English the "smart-ass-syndrome".) Pheidippides - as we spell the name in German - has not a historical proven existence and even if he really existed, he already should have taken part in the battle before his famous Marathon running so he could really have been exhausted to the death.
The other point is that human beings also seem to have a desire to find a balance or compensation for their profession or their position. In carnival processions in Germany, you can sometimes see people dressed as kings who are poor in reality and you can see beggar costumes of people who are millionnaires in reality.
Or another example: There once was a famous German boxer and catcher, a really big man with "Hände so groß wie Klodeckel" (= "hands as big as toilet seat tops") and he was at the same time one of the most famous German collectors of glass & China porcellaine miniatures.
So, I am in reality the most helpful and friendly person you can imagine, but in my imagination, my nightmares and in my drawings, I am on the opposite a really dangerous man - just because my mind likes to find a compensation to my extreme friendliness and I am sometimes afraid what kind of human being I could have been with a completely different education in a completely different German society like 90 years ago.
First, let me apologize for having missed your reply all those months ago. The alert system on this site functions only sporadically.

Regarding your first paragraph, yes, the Phidippides story is probably a myth, but the truth is that a great many people crave physical challenges. Extreme sports are very popular. There are lines to climb Everest (even to try costs somewhere around $ 70,000) despite the fact that if you make the summit, you may not get to spend more than a few minutes there because of fear of running out of oxygen and the need to let others come up.
Regarding your own imagination and that of many others here and what they would do in different circumstances, my response is that humans are conditioned by their societies, so "don't be too sure of yourself". On this site and other similar ones, everyone says "In real life I wouldn't hurt a fly". I don't dispute that, but we live in societies where doing even the least of what is shown here in stories and pictures would land you in prison for life and be universally condemned. But what if your society says: "It's OK to do whatever you want to certain people because they are bad or dangerous or whatever"? The historical truth is that such societies have always found managed to find people to do evil things.
 
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