Look at your views and remember most members could never hope to speak as eloquently as I!!!Thanks Tree. Pleased that somebody reads our drivel.
Tree
Look at your views and remember most members could never hope to speak as eloquently as I!!!Thanks Tree. Pleased that somebody reads our drivel.
Pleased that somebody reads our drivel.
that Bonjela concert last week
Continuing.
Ruth. "Mother!..It's Bon Jovi!...and why were we given all that water to drink? I'm bursting for a pee."
Beth. "You need to be hydrated, especially if it's that bitch Mildred giving us a whipping. She likes to leave you hanging in the sun for the boys to oggle at."
Ruth. "But I need a toilet NOW!"
Beth. "The toilets are over there but it looks like there's a queue."
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Ruth. "Noooo!...I'm NOT peeing in public with everybody watching!"
Beth. "Well it is expected that we put on a good show for the punters and if we don't perform then we'll get more lashes. Besides, you had no objection to peeing in public after the concert,"
Ruth,"I did NOT you lying bitch."
Beth. "You were too drunk to remember. You bet all the customers that you could piss out the Landord's BBQ."
Ruth. "Noo...well...if I did I was only acting in the public interest by putting out a fire hazard."
Beth. "It was behind a roped off bit of the garden and six feet away!"
Ruth. "Did I put it out?"
Beth. "Of course. I won a few shillings on the wager..but we did get banned for a month. You didn't do his witch burgers any favors."
Ruth. "Oh misery! This just gets worse by the second. You got me drunk. When we get home I'm gonna sell you to Ma McDonald and have you turned into burgers then I'm gonna feed em to the pigs."
Beth. "Oh look over there! That busty bitch from down the road is about to be whipped. Serves her right."
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To be continued
I'm getting a silly old senior.
(I had to check in case this really was one of those bands everybody in the universe except me has heard of -
but confirmed that Bonjela would be more likely to appeal to wayward wenches
after they've got inflamed and driven to frantic dancing
http://metro.co.uk/2017/05/10/is-it-safe-to-put-bonjela-in-your-vagina-or-on-your-vulva-6627438/)
An oldie but a goodie! I'm not quite sure what she did to earn it, but it must have pissed someone off right well. Interesting they don't announce the sentence in advance - especially since it's done in shifts and is a big public event. Also that the victim has no protection or aid after - what of those without mothers or friends to assist them?well here's a (rather stark) account of one stroppy teenage daughter's experience
Whipping Sunday
When you're going to be punished, you just get a letter – well, your parents get one – just a plain brown envelope from the Police HQ, "to the parent or guardian of ....". It tells where you have to report, and when.
...
Then we had to hurry to catch the last bus back home. The driver wasn't keen to even let me aboard, Mum assured him I'd sit on layers of plastic bags and my towel so as not to bleed on the upholstery. Passengers scowled when they saw me. They knew very well what I was – a stroppy teenage slut who'd got what she deserved on Whipping Sunday!