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German and Austrian Culture and Words ( to run away but also having fun with it before )

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I am back from my traditional weekly ALDI buy and I can understand why the US-customers may have a cultural shock after visiting ALDI for the first time.

Even I myself, being German, am sometimes not sure if I should be glad or also a bit afraid about this German "legendary success story".
The two brothers with the family name "Albrecht" who founded this supermarket chain after WW II by making it out of a small grocery store from her mother who wanted that they do not need to work in a mine like their father had to. These brothers were always extremely shy and very modest - so modest that in 1971 the kidnappers of one of them forced him to show them his passport because they were in doubt that a millionnaire could walk around in such poor clothes.
( "ALbrecht DIscount" -> "ALDI" )

On the other hand, just now in times of the coronavirus, this is THE German Supermarket at its highest level of efficiency in lowest prices, fastest buying and getting out again without having physical contact with another person.

The profits of the ALDI chain must be in astronomical spheres during the last weeks because these German supermarkets never had to close like other bigger stores (Karstadt, Kaufhof etc.) because they were excluded as "only food sellers" from the coronavirus restrictions and always tried as much as possible to separate the customers from the cashiers and newly hired guards were sometimes informing the customers when they were coming too close to each other in front of the cashiers.

Concerning missing "brands" in ALDI: I don't know how ALDI is organizing this in the USA, but in Germany they made something I really liked. They must have (had?) real "geniuses" in arithmetics and mathematics at their planning staff because they thought one day in the 1970's or 1980's that there are lots of wasted food in companies who offer only high quality brands and much of these food was thrown away, for example milk products. And now came the managers of ALDI, who tried to find out before a brand company even thought of it how much is produced too much in which times. There were reports from investigative journalists on German TV some decades ago, that ALDI managers did the following for sure: They offered the German brand company "Müller-Milch" millions of money, if they would sell them their overproduction in milk-products in hottest summer when fewer people would buy yoghurt etc. when they print on their products a new neutral name like "Desira" which then was sold for half the price at ALDI. So, ALDI had suddenly perfect milk products of a high qualitiy to offer, only their best-before date was up to five days shorter than in other stores and "Müller-Milch" did not have to throw away and waste good milk, what was not sold in other stores because of the much higher price or because of over-production. This was in principle the reason why ALDI made so incredible profits during the last 40 years:
They were looking like detectives for overproductions, buying them as fast as possible and selling them similar fast as "no-name-products" for half the price.

So, not so many people know until today that in the ALDI brands are often much more expensive brands from better known companies and I would really like to know if they do their business in the USA in the same way.

By the way, an ALDI manager was said 3 years ago to have been sitting in a plane on his business trip to or from the USA, one seat behind "Anastacia". This is what happened and was to sale some months later at ALDI in Germany:
These ALDI managers must be like police dogs, sniffing around for the best business everywhere ...

Moreover, the ALDI managers sometimes seem to make "compensation trades" like the Soviet Union did in the 1970's with goods you would not expect to be traded as long as both sides make profit, for example (just a joke) "you buy our Sauerkraut and we buy your Computers or your submarines if you have them". So, around the year 2000 suddenly ALDI had incredible good computers to offer at very low prices which were produced in parts in Taiwan, assembled & put together in Turkey, sold in Germany and a German comedian made jokes about that, imitating a Turkish "ü"-dialect: "ALDI is selling today Chinese compüters with Üntel ünside!"

Another special sale of ALDI was even part of an investigation from the German border police but the items were sold so fast that the police came too late: Italian wine at a price so low that it was even impossible to buy wine at this price in Italy! The wine was controlled by German laboratories by order of the investigating attorney: It was really good wine, not of the highest quality but really good. No one ever found out where this wine was produced and how it came to Germany to be sold at such a low price. There were jokes that ALDI must have found a second Jesus who was able to turn water into Italian wine.

But this story shows about ALDI what makes me a bit afraid, being a German: How do they do such businesses as law-abiding Germans ?
 
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I am back from my traditional weekly ALDI buy and I can understand why the US-customers may have a cultural shock after visiting ALDI for the first time.

Even I myself, being German, am sometimes not sure if I should be glad or also a bit afraid about this German "legendary success story".
The two brothers with the family name "Albrecht" who founded this supermarket chain after WW II by making it out of a small grocery store from her mother who wanted that they do not need to work in a mine like their father had to. These brothers were always extremely shy and very modest - so modest that in 1971 the kidnappers of one of them forced him to show them his passport because they were in doubt that a millionnaire could walk around in such poor clothes.
( "ALbrecht DIscount" -> "ALDI" )

On the other hand, just now in times of the coronavirus, this is THE German Supermarket at its highest level of efficiency in lowest prices, fastest buying and getting out again without having physical contact with another person.

The profits of the ALDI chain must be in astronomical spheres during the last weeks because these German supermarkets never had to close like other bigger stores (Karstadt, Kaufhof etc.) because they were excluded as "only food sellers" from the coronavirus restrictions and always tried as much as possible to separate the customers from the cashiers and newly hired guards were sometimes informing the customers when they were coming too close to each other in front of the cashiers.

Concerning missing "brands" in ALDI: I don't know how ALDI is organizing this in the USA, but in Germany they made something I really liked. They must have (had?) real "geniuses" in arithmetics and mathematics at their planning staff because they thought one day in the 1970's or 1980's that there are lots of wasted food in companies who offer only high quality brands and much of these food was thrown away, for example milk products. And now came the managers of ALDI, who tried to find out before a brand company even thought of it how much is produced too much in which times. There were reports from investigative journalists on German TV some decades ago, that ALDI managers did the following for sure: They offered the German brand company "Müller-Milch" millions of money, if they would sell them their overproduction in milk-products in hottest summer when fewer people would buy yoghurt etc. when they print on their products a new neutral name like "Desira" which then was sold for half the price at ALDI. So, ALDI had suddenly perfect milk products of a high qualitiy to offer, only their best-before date was up to five days shorter than in other stores and "Müller-Milch" did not have to throw away and waste good milk, what was not sold in other stores because of the much higher price or because of over-production. This was in principle the reason why ALDI made so incredible profits during the last 40 years:
They were looking like detectives for overproductions, buying them as fast as possible and selling them similar fast as "no-name-products" for half the price.

So, not so many people know until today that in the ALDI brands are often much more expensive brands from better known companies and I would really like to know if they do their business in the USA in the same way.

By the way, an ALDI manager was said 3 years ago to have been sitting in a plane on his business trip to or from the USA, one seat behind "Anastacia". This is what happened and was to sale some months later at ALDI in Germany:
These ALDI managers must be like police dogs, sniffing around for the best business everywhere ...

Moreover, the ALDI managers sometimes seem to make "compensation trades" like the Soviet Union did in the 1970's with goods you would not expect to be traded as long as both sides make profit, for example (just a joke) "you buy our Sauerkraut and we buy your Computers or your submarines if you have them". So, around the year 2000 suddenly ALDI had incredible good computers to offer at very low prices which were produced in parts in Taiwan, assembled & put together in Turkey, sold in Germany and a German comedian made jokes about that, imitating a Turkish "ü"-dialect: "ALDI is selling today Chinese compüters with Üntel ünside!"

Another special sale of ALDI was even part of an investigation from the German border police but the items were sold so fast that the police came too late: Italian wine at a price so low that it was even impossible to buy wine at this price in Italy! The wine was controlled by German laboratories by order of the investigating attorney: It was really good wine, not of the highest quality but really good. No one ever found out where this wine was produced and how it came to Germany to be sold at such a low price. There were jokes that ALDI must have found a second Jesus who was able to turn water into Italian wine.

But this story shows about ALDI what makes me a bit afraid, being a German: How do they do such businesses as law-abiding Germans ?
A greeting card:
Preacher (at the wheel): "What's wrong, Officer?"
Police Officer (writing a ticket): "Have you been drinking, Reverend?"
Preacher: "Only water, Officer."
Police Officer: "Then why do I smell wine?"
Preacher: "Good Lord! He's done it again!"
 
The water for the preacher could also have been from ALDI. To be honest, I think ALDI made in those times a buy which they had not under control. Given the stories of that time from Italy, I assume the wine in that story was bottled by an Italian company - which possibly disappeared then over night - but the wine itself came frome another country. There are countries in Eastern Europe which are producing really good wines but they are having problems of selling them - or would you like to offer your guests at home when you are having a big party, e.g. "Dracula-Wine" from Romania or from Moldova? OK, it depends on the theme of your party, but you know what I mean.
So, many wines from such countries are sold to traders in Western European countries and when they taste good enough like an Italian or a French wine of that year, "maybe" they are bottled with an Italian or French label (Surely, Germans would certainly never-never-never ever do something like this because it could look like something illegal !!!) and sold as their own wines. So, we don't know if ALDI knew such a story of this special wine or not - in any case, the story was so embarrassing for ALDI that they never had again a wine for this price and everyone seemed later to be a bit content: ALDI and the producer of this wine (who ever where ever it was) seemed to have made profit, the customers got a really good "Italian" wine for a price like never before and the German attorney was confirmed in his believe that you always have to be suspicious about very cheap wines - except you have very good relations to Jesus as ALDI might have (had?).
 
Here in UK ALDI is super-popular, I queued for about 10mins to get in my local one yesterday. I actually prefer Lidl, very similar format, but the range of less usual products seems greater.

So Old Slave can afford two glasses of wine with his meal, now he shops there. And Moldovan wine is OK.
 
Yes, and I think the prices will ever decide how successful a supermarket will be and when you buy for 100,- Euros food for your family and in one supermarket the shopping cart is full and in the other supermarket only half full at the same expense, the decision is easy which of these supermarkets will be your favourite one next month ...
 
By the way (= seems to be one of my most-loved expressions, but it could be worse), in one of the other threads I asked for the meaning of "on the fritz" and how it could have been derived and I found a video from a Bavarian comedian in a temporarily exile in Scotland who unfortunately always had a problem with "Fritz" because this is one of his names:

 
Oh nooooo! You too? I am shocked!

View attachment 853686

Fun fact: The guy has German roots. His father's parents were immigrants from Bavaria.

Back to the wonderful creations of the German language. I came across the following sentences and although it's my mother tongue, I had to read them twice:

"Wenn Fliegen hinter Fliegen fliegen, fliegen Fliegen Fliegen hinterher." (When flies fly behind flies, flies fly behind flies.)

"Der, der der, der der Finger blutete, das Pflaster gab." (The one [male] who gave the patch to the one [female] with the bleeding finger.)
 
Your first example is rather easy to understand for Germans but the second one is really "tricky" to speak, because you need to change the intonation and make rather long pauses at the point where the comma was set. Otherwise, you will possibly have a similar German reaction like in this joke from France, in which an Englishman was said trying to buy two train tickets to Toulouse at a French train station in Paris: "Please, two to Toulouse!" French civil servant answering: "Tatarataaaa!"

Please remember us Germans not of the German roots of Donald Trump because - in the meantime - there are lots of German jokes giving reasons why the Trump family probably left Germany - or had to leave. And the reaction of Angela Merkel "speaks for itself", when Trump mentioned the German part in his blood during a press conference:

By the way, in order to make everything more complicated to understand (in which we Germans are real masters!), you could surprise many Germans and Bavarians (!) today by speaking of the Trump family as "immigrants from Bavaria" because the family was coming from Kallstadt in Palatinate ("Pfalz"). This part of Germany belonged to Bavaria as an exclave until the end of WW I, but since 1918 it was not Bavaria any more.
Probably today, the Palatinates will say, the Trumps came from Bavaria and the Bavarians will say, the Trumps came from Palatinate.

The personal & private relations between Angela Merkel and Donald Trump are similar "emotional" like to Wladimir Xyulo - wanted by criminal international court in The Hague and for most of Germans, these satirical examples are showing a lot of reality:

Ashampoo_Snap_2020.04.15_21h58m56s_007_.jpg Ashampoo_Snap_2020.04.15_22h49m20s_027__ji.jpg
 
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After my last posting here, mentioning some famous politicians, I simply cannot explain to myself - hrm - why I suddenly remembered one of the most interesting persons of German history, the noble Baron Hieronymus Karl Friedrich von Münchhausen, the so-called "Baron of Lies" and his unbelievable stories ...


... which made it to the cinema in one of the most expensive and most extraordinary trick movies in German history, filmed with incredible expenditure in 1943 in the worst time of German history, just to distract the people from the fear and terror of war with some of the most famous tall stories, for example the "ride on the cannonball":


What makes everything for me even more unbelievable is, that I read today by coincidence an incredible ironic German article about the probably only country in the world, where there really is a monument for this German Baron, honoring his military heroic deeds in the war against the Osman Empire when Baron Münchhausen was fighting for the Russian Empire.
Well-fitting, this probably only monument for his military abilities was built in a country which does not really exist because it was not recognized after its separation war from Moldova, not even from Moscow but it was proudly declared by some Moscow-supported local political Mafia-structures to be the "Pridnestrovian Moldavian Republic" or as we Germans say: "Transnistria"!

The article about a voyage into this "country" was written so ironical by authors of the rather conservative German "Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung" (FAZ) that I will try to translate it into English here as soon as possible (but not today):


Oh, by the way, the movie of 1943 is not "correct" in the "true story" of the cannonball ride because in the movie, Baron Münchhausen gets into a Turkish luxury prison, but in the "real story" of the battle at the fortress of Bendery, he was able to change from his cannonball to a Turkish cannonball which was flying into the opposite direction back to his troops. A true hero whose history is remembered forever at Bendery in Transnistria with a luxury cannonball:

Ashampoo_Snap_2020.04.28_22h10m48s_002_.jpg Ashampoo_Snap_2020.04.28_22h10m06s_001_.jpg
 
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