Girl without a sword

[phlebas]

I see you, head against the wood
Cord fraying, little by little
I see what you are doing
Do I let this small rebellion build?
You have so little freedom
Pinned as you are
Naked and exposed
I will watch, and decide

For now, let me marvel
At how two pieces of wood
Transform a woman
Highlight her shape
Make her something special
Body stressed, beautiful
A true test of character

Now as you rise again
Breasts pushed forward
Back arched in defiance
Arms flexed
Look of triumph on your face
No, more, you are looking
At something we cannot see
Not crude peasants, weary matrons
But another world
Where your efforts go beyond survival
Into a place of hightened senses
Pain and pleasure mixed together
None that see you
Can understand what you are feeling

Listen to me, blathering on,
Not like me at all
A practical man
I see a woman pushed to the limits
Her body sends confused signals
Her face, sweat covered
Signals strong feelings
Her nipples, the cool breeze?
Or more, arousal

I see it, hear it in your breath
The way you squeeze thighs together
More than modesty (who has modesty, on the cross?)
Strong sensation, as you slide down
From the high place
Shuddering, gasping
You lose control
Body sliding out of line
A cry escapes, frustration?
Or release?

Panting now, hanging on the nails
A woman drained by exertion
By passion
Eyes reach out to me
"Water, please..."
Now you realise
Your time in the stream
You should have taken your fill there
Not freed your hair
Now you have need

"Bring water"
A young man goes to the stream
But your eyes stay on me
Searching, what do you see?
A man who has power over you
Can give pain or comfort
Protect from abuse
Watch you till death
Is this what you see?

You are out of line again
Twisted awkwardly
Hips rest on the shaft's side
Arse fully exposed to view
So vulnerable
Anyone could take advantage
Let me shove you back
Flesh in my hands
Buttocks against the wood

"Give me the cup"
Here, girl, I know you thirst
Here is water, cool and clear
Be careful to sip, or you may choke
As I hold it to your lips
My other hand tracing the shape
Of skin stretched tight
Over your shoulder blade
Feeling the welts of my whip
The curve of your back

So helpless, mouth open to my cup
Water dribbles down your chest
Body warm under my hand
Sweaty, sticky with dried blood
And what else?
Yes, the hand moves lower
Feels that place under you
Half hidden by thigh meat
Warm, and moist. They call you slut
But I admire you
Giving yourself so completely
Embracing the cross
Breaking through your shame
To take what you can
Some pleasure in all this pain

The cup removed
I raise my finger to your lips
"Taste"
Your eyes on mine, you part your lips
Lick my finger
Allow it inside, sucking gently
The taste of a woman
Who finds pleasure in suffering

 

[Loxuru]

At how two pieces of wood
Transform a woman
Highlight her shape
Make her something special
Body stressed, beautiful
A true test of character

The craftsman admires his own successful creation : a woman he put on her cross.
He is fascinated by the beauty of it.
Fascinated by the scene he created, the beauty of the crucifixion, or by the woman?
Would he ever have singled out the woman, in a crowd?
If so, it is too late! By crucifying her, he restrained her into an admirable artwork, at the cost of losing her, forever.

 

[malins]

...a woman he put on her cross.

Would he ever have singled out the woman, in a crowd?

Perhaps yes ... perhaps he saw something in her that not many others did.
'Keep an eye on this one ... something is going to happen'

 

[malins]

"Bring water"
A young man goes to the stream

My plea a hoarse whisper barely heard,
through your voice, in an instant
- becomes a firm command, obeyed without question.

Has in some twisted manner,
this cross raised me to royalty, my least wish to be served?

No, it is for another purpose that my cup is filled,
The law is the law, and I must suffer under sun and moon.

I'm tired and worn, I've been whipped in the frame, I've walked with my cross,
I've been hanging from it for ...
not so long in truth, but how long can I last?

I can't bear it!

I should refuse what I have asked for.
Spit it in your face,
... that would make you angry,
... that would make you hurt me,
... that would end me quicker.

Because I can't go on.
But I can't make it stop either,
I can't resist the promise of relief,
the illusion of life.

You help me out of my awkward pose,
hands coursing over my buttocks,
then firm, sinking in, lifting me,
placing me again where I can rest against the beam.

You raise the cup to my lip.
Slowly first I sip,
then drink deep.
All my life is pain but still I'm eager to live!
Curse my heart that will not cease!

Greedy greedy me.
Water splashes over me, down my chest,
down, all over me, dripping
Oh but this is good too!
More!

Beyond slaking thirst,
I don't want it to stop:
that blessed relief,
Cool water running down my parched throat,
hoarse from my screaming.
Cool water coursing over me, soothing welts and strains ...

oh never let it stop ... but then,

it's your hand,
fingers tracing the path of those rivulets down my body.
Over my chest, rising and falling with its rapid panic breath,
down over my belly
stretched out as I hang low,
over my mound and parting my lips,
in, to where the heat is unquenchable.

You know what I am.

I wonder, did you see it right away?
I can't recall, when I came along the path,
coming into town, before I played my trick,
Had you seen me walking there?

Did you see right through me, from the first?
Did some part of you guess,
that all in the course of a day,
it would come to this ...?

Maybe you guessed what I might be,
but now you know for sure what I am.
And you want to let me know you know.

As you raise that same finger to my mouth,
I briefly try to turn away,
but I can't deny what you and I both know.

Give up all pretense, all resistance,
give in to what's revealed of me.

I rear up on my cross, arching out, right there in front of you,
in wild, mindless frenzy,
no more of the careful, deliberate pulling up,
no more of trying to lessen pains and conserve strength.

All thinking stops.
Mere flesh, thrashing about.
Utterly unaware, unheeding of what each frantic move means for the many pains racking this body.

Mindless like a worm squirming on a fish-hook,
I throw myself about tearing at the nails,
I push and pull, bash my head against the beam,
I scream and scream and scream, wasting precious breath.

And what else I do I don't know, I forget myself.
You will see, you will know.

What draws me back into my wretched self,
is the cramps, knotting in my calves,
bringing me down just as quickly as if you'd broken my legs.
Spasms of agony this time.

I fall.
I'm spent.
I hang helpless, my head lolling sideways, my eyes unfocusing.
The cross has broken me.
But still, you're there.

I need you to know one more thing...
...my voice a thin rasp...

I've given all I can give,
you told me you would not ask more than I can give.
it's too much.
There is no more I can give.

Promise me...
- please, when this law is fulfilled
- as soon as the moon has risen over me ...
remember it started with a blade...
... so too, end it with a blade.
put an end to me as soon as the moon is up.
Then forget me and the law is fulfilled.

Promise!
that you'll end this before,
on this cross, ...
still living, ...
I become meat for the maggots...

 

[phlebas]

My wet finger
Is proof of your nature
You cannot hide it
The taste of your own juice
Enlivens you
Rearing suddenly
Body arched, thrashing and squirming
Pushing me back in surprise
A face full of female flesh

This body, bare and exposed
Draws all eyes
Captures all interest
Screaming, thrown here and there
Breasts bouncing on your chest
Head bashing the beam behind you
Your thighs part, a glimpse of what hides between
That wetness that betrays you

Screaming and jerking
Fighting the cross
Is it to distract
To draw attention from your shame
To take control again?
It will not work

The cross has done it's job
Your body has struggled too long
Cramps seize you
Pain like never before
Knots your limbs
Now you jerk in helpless agony
Your own body against you
Muscles bulge involuntarily
Sap your energy, your will

As if cut down, legs swept from underneath,
With a cry you slump heavily again
Twitching, face wracked in pain
Head sags, defeated, broken
Your voice rasps through the suffering
Promise me

Promise!
that you'll end this before,
on this cross, ...
still living, ...
I become meat for the maggots...

I take your cramped calves in my hands
Begin work to ease the pain
Take the knots away, give relief
It is not hard, to touch you
Stroke you, knead your limbs
Relax the trembling body
And ease your mind

I promised you before
I will not ask
What you cannot give
You have given so much
Stay with me now
I promise, I will end this
When the moon is over you
Before the maggots come
I will give you relief

Let me soothe you now
Rub your thighs
Drive away cramp
Does it feel good?
Does it help?
What about this, here
I see it tickles
When I touch you there

Not so defiant now
A defeated woman
Slumped on her cross
Blood trickles down
Stretched arms
Breath comes in short gasps

The beauty of it takes my breath away

Late in the day you look uncomfortable
(How does one look comfortable, on a cross?)
Squirming, pressing your thighs together
Head turned away, tears in your eyes
Rising again, thighs partly open now
Another shred of dignity passes from you
Unable to hold it in, a stream
Warm against the cooler air
Pattering on the ground before you
There are still people here, watching
Some mock your lack of control
Laugh at this private act
Performed in so public a place
You do not look at them
Do not give them the satisfaction
Of seeing the barbs go in
But I see
What it costs you
To hold on
Keep holding on

I will end this for you
Trust me

 

[malins]

I promised you before

Promises, sweet promises, but what will remain of them when the darkest hour comes?

Low and humbled I hang.

In every way, my body has turned against me.

How is it even possible,
that anything could be more painful,
than hanging helpless, from nails through my limbs, wild torment raging?

But my treasonous body has managed...
as the cramps wracked me I understood,
it always gets worse,
the torture ratchets up, all by itself.

I needed you... you! who pounded those nails into me!
You was who I needed to relieve me from those horrible pangs
to just get back to suffering like before,

like before,
but again, a bit weaker,
again, a bit more worn and torn.

How is it even possible,
that anything could me more shameful,
than squirming naked, under the eyes of all, strange passions boiling?

But that same treasonous body has managed ...
Thirsting, greedily gulping, and then not able to hold
Making me a mockery as I wet myself and the ground

There were not moments, when I felt almost proud?
when I could have said,
whose is the shame, here? -- when it's all of you looking at me!

Who exposed me, who gathered to gawk at me?
I had my guilt, but since I was paying with my cross, I felt little shame.
So long as I was able to pay, to give more, I felt it shame could not touch me.

Paying with my body on the cross! - who among you ever did?
You saw something shameful, shame on you for looking!

That was then,
when I was rising high,
proud to show I was able to take my punishment.

And when I pushed up and threw back my hair, they gazed in awe,
at my body arching out, offering myself,
trembling, glistening golden in the evening sun,
exalted in my suffering, perhaps even ...
by some, admired for the acceptance of my fate.

That was when the cross had not yet broken me.

Now I am defeated.
I have nothing more to give,
I've paid as I can but my debt remains,
mine is all the shame,
and I long for darkness to engulf me.

Night has come and I feel the end is near.
My arms are far too weak to pull me up,
my legs are jelly,
my lungs starved for air with shallow frantic breath.

I drift in and out of consciousness.
Each time woken by the panic of suffocation.
Each time groaning and straining more to push up just a little less.

The wild dance is over, there is nothing much to see.
Puny cross-meat, unworthy of pity, beneath contempt.
Spectators drift away for better things to do.

Hanging so still I feel the cold creeping up now from along the streambed.
Again I slip away and dream of warm blankets,
return to shivering and chattering of my teeth.

A bell tolls, calling townspeople back to safety,
warm and snug inside the walls for the night,
before the gates are shut.
Keep out ghosts, and the living dead.

Then it is very still.
Alone and cold.

Only the burbling of the stream,
a distant hoot from the forests,
the furtive scurry of nocturnal paws.

My eyes probe the darkness,
a speck of light on a distant hill, perhaps a shepherd's fire,
otherwise I'm alone, deserted,
abandoned by every human soul.

Abandoned even by you.
Somehow in between my fainting and waking, you slipped away.
Did you not promise to make an end for me, when I had nothing more to give?
Broken promises!
Lies!
But what matters a promise to a broken thing.
Black despair claws my heart.

A sliver of light breaks through the trees, the rising moon.
Wearily I lift my head, and look towards its light, along my outstretched arm.
Hanging low so long,
the wounds have torn open,
blood snakes thick and dark in the silver light.

It should be time now for the end.

But I have to face it alone, cold, abandoned.
What breath I have, is wasted in a long percing wail, the dying cry of last, lost hopes.

I succumb to deep darkness,
like sinking through turbid waters
and coming to rest in soft black silt.

Half-dreaming half dying,
I hear the hollow sound of cartwheels
over the arch of the stone bridge.

That will be the corpse-cart,
coming to fetch me,
haul me off to the midden-heap.

 

[Loxuru]

Abandoned, even by your tormentor!
Being left alone in the dark, seems a punishment on its own?

When alone with your guilt, the punishment does not make sense to you?

 

[phlebas]

The day has passed
The people gone home
Before the gates close
Before the dark falls
Home to their beds

It has been a hard day
A long hard journey
Pain filled
Shameful
You have borne it well
So well, accepted all
Taken all that was put on you
Endured

Now it is quiet
The dark is falling
Left to yourself
I know you don't see me
You believe I have left you
No
I promised I would stay with you
To the end
That I would end this
I asked that you trust

I have gone back to town
To fetch what I need
To end this

Now the people have gone
Now the moon is over you
Now I come back to you
I am in the cart
I am back at your side
Look, girl, I have not left you
The maggots will not have you

I will have you

I have done my duty
As you have
Endured your punishment
I have put you to the test
Before witnesses
Delivered your punishment

I have waited

to hang and suffer
under sun and moon,
to be seen by all
in their disgrace.

Here you hang
Moon above you
The crowds are gone
There is just you
And me
We have done our duty
Upheld the law
This is our time
And I am here
To fulfil my promise

Hanging naked, drained
Beautiful still
Limp against the cross
Barely moving
Hardly breathing

Let me help
Take some of your weight
My hands under here
Lifting your thigh
Giving you relief
Let me touch your face
Test you for breath
Touch your lips, still moist
Remember when I put my finger
Between your lips?
The taste of your sex in your mouth?
The thought of it arouses me

You are moving, that is good
Not yet aware of me
But your mouth seeks my fingers
Here, have my own lips
On yours
Let me breathe life into you
Warm you, remind you there is a world waiting
You have not left yet!

What I have held inside
Through the long day
Is free now, we are both free now
Let my hands feel you
Slide over smooth skin
Let my lips touch yours
Taste you, you still have life!
Fingers trace stiffened nipples
One hand around you
Feeling the small of your back
Curve of your hip

You are moving again now
Mumbling, not yet coherent
But warm, and responsive
No longer patient
I am eager to taste
All that you are
We are free now
No eyes watching
And I will have you

I am a good husband
To a faithful wife
Never have I taken a woman
Restrained as you are
I have seen desire
In your eyes
Felt the thrill in you
When we touched
We have been through so much
Now is the time, our time
Wake, dear girl
Let me wake you
Fan the fire you have kept
Throughout the day

Part your thighs
A gasp of pain, those nails
Are not kind to your feet
But I bring comfort
Let me kiss you
Taste your essence
The smell of woman
The secret flesh
Open to a friendly tongue
Now is the time, open yourself
There is no shame, no mocking crowd
I do not ask
What you cannot give
Only that you give yourself
And take, take what I offer in return

My hands take your weight
My mouth seeks your centre
Smooth, succulent folds
Slide under my tongue
Give themselves to my kisses
I feel you coming alive
Becoming aware of me
Of us
In this moment
You wonder what is happening
You expected the end
No, girl, this is a beginning, not an end

As your body moves to my touch
You find speech again
"Yes, yes" but also
"Ohh, it hurts"
I want to have you completely
To spread your thighs
Put my body entirely between them
But this will hurt
To force you open against the nails
I don't want to hurt you
(Does that sound strange?
After all we have been through together?)

I kiss from belly all the way up to your mouth
Look you in the eyes
"Turn your hips to the side
As you did before
Hang beside the cross"
Now from behind
I see your curves
Freed of the wood
One hand on your flank
One across your belly
Positioning you

This long day has come to
The inevitable end
No, not Death
Our joining, our passion
You know, you have felt it too
I am hard, and ready
Hot breath on your neck
Hard flesh probing between your thighs
You are smooth, lubricated
One quick firm thrust is enough
Then slowly, savouring the moment
Waiting as you join the rhythm
Head thrown back
Breathing hard
Body stretched tight

Arms hold you close
Teeth nibble your ear
Your soft arse against me
Your smooth pussy around me
I wanted this from the beginning
You conquered me, now we are entwined
Forever joined

Your cries split the dark
My shout of relief joins them
We have done it
We have reached the finish line
Now the law is complete

Whosoever dares to defile the sacred blade,
shall be nailed by hands and feet to a cross of wood,
to spread them out in pain,
and they shall be raised on that cross,
to hang and suffer
under sun and moon,
to be seen by all
in their disgrace.
And their name shall be forgotten among us!
So it shall be done!

You are spent, sagging again on your cross
I am tired, but have work to do
To the cart, to get a mallet
"This will hurt, but must be done"
The nails protrude from the back of the wood
I will strike them
Push them back through
Make them easier to extract
You do not understand?
I said I would save you
You have suffered under sun and moon
You have paid your price
Now your name will be forgotten
You shall have another name
You will heal
And you will live with me
Belong to me, in thrall

There is a place for you
A new name for you
Careful now, while I take you down
I do not want to hurt you!




Some illustrations to help understand the mechanics of this episode
Not essential to the story

 

[Jollyrei]

A FITTING END TO THE STORY, TAKING HER YOURSELF, RATHER THAN LEAVING HER TO ME...FOR A WHILE ANYWAY.
BEAUTIFULLY WRITTEN AND LIVED, BOTH OF YOU.

 

[malins]

A FITTING END TO THE STORY, TAKING HER YOURSELF, RATHER THAN LEAVING HER TO ME...FOR A WHILE ANYWAY.
BEAUTIFULLY WRITTEN AND LIVED, BOTH OF YOU.

Still an epilogue in the works though...

 

[Wragg]

Still an epilogue in the works though...

I shall look forward to it.

I am very sorry, Malins and Phlebas, my attention was elsewhere (Jasmine) and I've only just caught up with this thread, from A to, well, Y if there's still an epilogue coming...

I couldn't read it at one go... that would be like gulping down an expensive meal, and I think it would be overwhelming. Two master storytellers have combined their considerable talents to produce a work of simply astounding value. I thought everything about crucifixion had been said and done; I was wrong. This story has reached deep into my soul, and has electrified it. Somehow you have both grasped the emotional impact of the events you describe, and, Masters of your craft, you have taken the richness of the English language and honed it until it fits those feelings and emotions to perfection. You have not accepted second best, but persevered until you have achieved the masterpiece that we have here.

I am, literally, awestruck. Thank you both, SO much!

 

[Loxuru]

This was an unexpected turn! So I wonder what the epilogue will bring us!

 

[malins]

This was an unexpected turn! So I wonder what the epilogue will bring us!

Well the two of us have been following a devious plan here for quite a while but now our hand is revealed and the general direction will not change anymore. It all started out as improvisation on an image but it's become quite the journey. It's been a while since I enjoyed writing on the subject this much!

I thought everything about crucifixion had been said and done; I was wrong. This story has reached deep into my soul, and has electrified it. Somehow you have both grasped the emotional impact of the events you describe,

Thanks - we've really tried to focus on the inner emotional conflicts of our characters here, a victim/delinquent who can't quite consider herself innocent, and a captor/punisher who weighs his personal sense of honor and justice, against that of the traditions of the surrounding society...

 

[malins]

Some illustrations to help understand the mechanics of this episode
Not essential to the story

This one by @crumera has a similar approach...

Another sketch without a real story.
...

 

[malins]

Epilogue.

Tugging at the edge of my consciousness, a familiar sound.

A soothing one that tells me,
go back to sleep ... and I drift away
But in shallow waters,
not those deep dark depths.

I'm still by the stream?
No, it sounds different, a smaller flow
somewhere else or further upstream?

Shouldn't I be dead?
My eyelids feel so heavy.
Keeping a train of thought in my head is ... so exhausting.
Drifting again...

Shouldn't I be dead?
Don't I pretty much remember actually dying ...
painful spasms as I couldn't get any air, drowning...
But I sense my body,
I'm not some spirit in the netherworld.

From my feet, a pulsing and tingling, itching ... sensations of healing.
My arms and hands, they seem to be ... floating? .. not quite there.
Though there's that burning from my fingertips,
like thawing, after digging in the snow too long.

Lying on my back.
The skin there tender against the fabric,
but no longer raw with sores and welts.
Still too afraid to open my eyes.
To find out exactly what it means ...
to be alive.

My memories are only splinters,
fragments that I try to join together.
Blows pounding on the nails again,
dull hurt in tired tortured limbs...
My feet falling away, to the ground ... the nails sticking out ...
Now ... no nails anymore.
I was ... taken down...

And ... there was something else.
Thinking of it ...
rekindles a warmth deep in my belly, and has me chewing my lip.
I was ... taken...

I dare to open my eyes.
My arms are suspended in slings, kept still, wrists bandaged.
I try to move them, a bell on a string tinkles ...
alerting someone that I'm wake?
I must have been lying here, tended to, for days ...

Steps approach.
It's hard to keep my heavy eyes open but ...
seeing your face brings memory rushing back ...

it's over!
My punishment done.
the law of sword and cross, fulfilled.

I said I would save you
You have suffered under sun and moon
You have paid your price
Now your name will be forgotten
You shall have another name
You will heal

hoarsely my words come out ...

You never asked, did you...
Through all of this,

you never once
asked my name.

That is good...

 

[Loxuru]

Some waking up from death!

Now that you stay alive again, only now, your name will matter!

 

[Deleted member 33472]

Malins , Phlebas .... Chapeau !!



You are leaving me .... speechless ....

 

[malins]

View attachment 933742

I'm sure they're agitating for a worthy cause
( though whatever happened to #FreeTheNipple )

but it doesn't really fit in with the story ... maybe something for threads like Random Pictures or Odds And Ends ...