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Limericks

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windar

Teller of Tales
I invite the submission of any limericks related to CF themes.

"The Worse, the Better," in the words attributed to various Russian revolutionaries (probably Chernyshevsky and probably not Lenin).

Just to start things off here's a very bad one:

In Rome, there once was a slave
Who denied her master what he craved
Said he, "I'm your boss
So it's off to the cross
And soon you will be in your grave."
 
Inspired by this image

pir074.jpg

I came up with:

From Van Hoek the bold buccaneer
I knew I had plenty to fear –
I trembled with dread
That he'd cut off my head,
But like Van Gogh he just took an ear!
 
Now, I'm at a bit of a loss
Why a girl is so good on a cross
Although, to be fair
When she's nailed way up there
It is me and not her who's the boss!
 
In Deutschland lebt ein Mann,
der gar nicht wusste, was er kann.
Auf Crux Forums konnt er wagen,
junge Frauen ans Kreuz zu schlagen.
Depictor of Dreams wurde er dann.

In Germany live a man,
who not knowed, what he can.
On CruxForums he could dare,
to crucify young Girls bare.
Depictor of Dreams has been this man.
 
In Deutschland lebt ein Mann,
der gar nicht wusste, was er kann.
Auf Crux Forums konnt er wagen,
junge Frauen ans Kreuz zu schlagen.
Depictor of Dreams wurde er dann.

In Germany live a man,
who not knowed, what he can.
On CruxForums he could dare,
to crucify young Girls bare.
Depictor of Dreams has been this man.
Bravo! It works in two languages.

There once was a hangman called Tree
who strung up young women for free
if they hang by the neck
why should he give a heck

which is why he charges no fee
Does the Union know Tree is working gratis?
 
There once was an artist called Madiosi
Whose crux manips were thought grandiosi
He liked them nailed and naked
Their modesty degraded

That his craft is the best, knows he
The BlueState girl was very fit,
her limerick should be the greatest hit.
Some members had to tease her,
but the blueState Girl have never fear.
She giving always demerits.
 
Sweet Winnie, who hails from Wales
Whose wails, impaled by nails
Rang forth all day long
Like any Welsh song
Through Wales' vales and dales

The scale of Welsh Winnie's wails!
I fail not in telling these tales!
There was no more doubt
She really could shout!
Assailing us males in gales!
 
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