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My Sister

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I couldn't believe we were having this conversation. Much less that I was listening, and that I was even beginning to think she might be right.

Heidi's ten years of slavery had been kinder to her than to most, and her last master had treated her like his granddaughter, ultimately setting her free just the week before.

In fact, he had originally bought her partly out of pity for her. About three years ago, in Adrianople, our mother and Heidi's twin sister Gelda had been sold to Quintus Laterus, who would take them home with him across the empire to Rome, leaving Heidi without family in Adrianople. So the old man, also from Rome, had bought Heidi so that she could stay close to her mother and sister.

I was her older brother by five years, and as a strong, adolescent Goth, I had been offered a position as an auxiliary in the Roman army when Rome had captured us and my mother and sisters had been sold as slaves. From there I had made it into the legion and was now a centurion before the age of thirty. Just four months ago, I managed to be stationed in Rome, near my mother and sisters.

Despite my distatste for Quintus Laterus, Gelda and my mother's master, the last four months had been some of the happiest of our lives. Before we had been conquered by Rome, life had been rough and hard, and our father was equal parts menace and protector. Then Rome had come, and the indignity of slavery soured the years, and discipline among the auxiliaries was strict. Then we had been separated when my mother and sisters were sold to Roman masters. Now we were back together, and as a centurion I had certain privileges and freedoms I had not had before. I was even saving money to be able to buy Gelda and my mother from that arrogant patrician Quintus Laterus.

And now, like something from some absurd nightmare, Heidi was telling me the unthinkable, and I was listening

"Roderic, you have to crucify me. Tonight!"


I don't know how I ever agreed. All I remember is her beautiful green eyes pleading with me as she held both my hands, and then we were walking out into the golden light of the early evening. It wasn't real yet. My eyes were dry; so were hers. Her agte was pensive and self-conscious, but I knew she hadn't let herself face the reality of what we were about to do. She was determined - I knew that much. And I knew her well enough to know that she would not turn back, but I also knew she was protecting herself mentally, taking one awkward step at a time, living the life she had left in the present.

"Wait," she turned back to me, "should you... whip me?" I was still like one in a dream, and the question at first felt academic.

"No," I replied, hardly thinking, "it's perfectly normal to crucify without a flogging. Although..." I realized a beating could shorten her suffering.

"Although what?"

"Nothing..." Suddenly I realized I was considering whether to tie my little sister to the public whipping post and rip her naked back apart with a scourge. No! It was impossible! The first painful stab of reality shot through me, and I had to shake my head to return to the dream.

"Should you tie my hands?"

"No, there is no need. I am armed and much stronger than you."

"You should at least hold my arm and treat me roughly, shouldn't you?" It took me a moment, but I took her bare arm tenderly in my hand and held her. My vision blurred.

We continued through the crowded evening streets of Rome for several more moments before she spoke again, this time leaning back slightly, almost with her head on my chest, and speaking very softly: "Roderic, I'm still fully dressed... Is that... It's alright, isn't it?"

I kept my eyes straight ahead and clenched my jaw. A couple of hard sniffs and my composure returned. I nodded.

"Be quiet now."


Staff member
"Should you tie my hands?"

"No, there is no need. I am armed and much stronger than you."

. . . . . . . . .

We continued through the crowded evening streets of Rome for several more moments before she spoke again, this time leaning back slightly, almost with her head on my chest, and speaking very softly: "Roderic, I'm still fully dressed... Is that... It's alright, isn't it?"

I kept my eyes straight ahead and clenched my jaw. A couple of hard sniffs and my composure returned. I nodded.

"Be quiet now."

I don't know what the hell is going on in this story, but it is captivating, sensual, engaging. Almost like a game, a dream. What will happen?


Thanks to @Horseman68 for reminding me of this little story on another thread! My apologies for the multi-year sabbatical, but I will now proceed as if nothing ever happened. :)

As we walked it crossed my mind that Heidi might very well be a virgin. I knew her kind master had never raped her, and, unlike Gelda, she had never been the type to trouble herself much with boys. If she had had a romance here and there, she hadn't spoken much about it. On the other hand, sometimes it seemed Gelda spoke of little besides the trials, blisses, and disappointments of love.

That is until she had met Brundegard, my former barracks-mate and now fellow centurion in the auxiliaries. With him, it was different, and we all knew it. Gelda spoke less after she met him, but smiled more. A quiet contentment came over her that we had never seen before in such a talkative girl. She almost stopped quarreling with our mother, even! And Brundegard loved her, too, and had added his meager savings to mine in the hope of purchasing Gelda's freedom sooner. That had been a month ago.

I wish Heidi could have found the same happiness before... before this. And yet in most ways, Heidi's life had been better. She hadn't had to endure the harassments of a master like Quintus Laterus, and even the lack of romance in her life seemed to leave her more content than Gelda had usually been. She had a quiet grace, and a selflessness that often moved her to the background, supporting, serving, asking nothing for herself. I think her former master had noticed it, and from it his pity was derived.

We were arriving at the gate. My stomach churned and my hands shook a little. Heidi noticed and put her hand over mine on her arm. (She would comfort me!) For a moment, hers was still and calm. As a tremble came upon her, though, she quickly withdrew her hand to hide it from me.


Angelus Mortis
Staff member
It is intriguing, but I'm still not quite sure how we get here. Some young girl says to her older brother, a Centurion, that she needs to be crucified tonight. I think the normal answer is, "don't be stupid!", not "okay, let's go." There must be something more going on, and I'm keen to know what the reason for all this is. In the meantime, this is another well written and emotionally charged piece from Juan. :beer::icon_popcorn:


We waited for a large merchant wagon to enter through the gate, then went out onto the road. I hesitated, looking up and down the dozen or so crosses on either side of the road, several of them empty. Heidi looked up at me.

"Which one?" she asked, her green eyes wide and afraid, but strong. It was such a concrete question, it could have helped if I had been able to focus on it instead of drifting in the fog of premature grief and the pure bizarreness of it all. But I couldn't. I just shrugged.

"You can choose..." I said, quietly. She looked the crosses up and down, then pointed briefly.

"That one," she said, indicating the furthest cross from the gate, on the right.

"Ok..." my heart ached, but my mind remained unconvinced. We walked the short distance to the cross my sister would die on. The cross I would execute her on.

It was getting late, so the road was not crowded, but there were still many travelers.

"You brought the nails?" Heidi whispered. I nodded. My vision blurred with tears again. "Rope?"

"Yes, be quiet."

We arrived, and stood, both of us, looking up at the cross for a moment. When she looked up at me, I remembered what I had to do, and set about taking the patibulum down so that Heidi could lie down on it, and I could nail her to it.

When it was on the ground, she took a step or two toward it, then turned awkwardly to face me. "I suppose I have to, um..." Her hands played nervously with the fabric of her tunic. I nodded. She had never been naked in front of me before. I thought of looking away, but it seemed ridiculous. I just watched as, after a moment's further consideration, and what looked like a false start or two, she hauled the tunic up over her head and off. She wore nothing underneath. She handed the garment to me, naked, eyes darting from me to something far up the road, her other hand sweeping and re-sweeping her hair behind her ear.

When I had taken the tunic, she stood there a moment, waiting for an order, I suppose. I couldn't even think what to command her to do. Eventually she lay down and spread her arms across the beam for nailing, her bare legs crossed awkwardly to hide her womanhood.


Juan. Well, you really are doing it. What Phlebas first said: captivating, sensual, engaging. And more, all from just a few words of initial conversation. Who knew what a hint could bring. Muchas gracias from the masses.
Thanks for your kind words, Horseman. But before expectations get too high, please remember that weaving a believable plot without embarrassing holes is not exactly my forte. Just because I've come up with a surreal and confusing premise doesn't necessarily mean that my explanation will end up being genius. :) We'll see, I guess...


I looked at her for a moment - for a while - it was probably longer than I thought. I looked at her there, spread out naked on the ground in front of me, this beautiful young woman, my sister. I looked completely without lust. It was a strange thing that no sexual thought entered my mind as I looked down at her body, and she awkwardly avoided looking me in the eye. Rather than erotic allure, I saw innocent beauty, this creature in the first bloom of her life, laying herself down to be destroyed. My eyes were dry as I tried to comprehend.

"Eldric?" she finally asked, when she could no longer stand waiting there on her back.

I returned to the present, fumbling in a leather satchel for nails, cursing Quintus Laterus, finding myself with nails in one hand, hammer in the other, cursing Brundegard, realizing I couldn't nail Heidi down without first binding her, dropping the nails and hammer, reaching for rope, fumbling furiously with its tangles...

When I finally had an untangled length of rope, I lifted her right hand to begin tying, then stopped, struck by a queasy thought.

"What?" she asked.

It took me a moment to work my mouth around to saying it: "Heidi, are you a virgin?" Her face immediately went red. "If you are, they will probably find out while you're on the cross."

"Will they?" her breathless voice, almost whispering from shock. I just nodded. "What would they...?"

"For example... when Quintus Laterus comes, he may..."

"Oh!" she had found a guttural voice in her revulsion, and she turned her head violently to the side in disgust as she said it.

"Or... we are often ordered to impale the women on cornus. They don't bleed if they are not virgins..."

Heidi still couldn't look at me. She seemed to be chewing on tears to keep them from her eyes. It took several moments, but then she spoke. "What should we do? Surely we can't...?"

"No!" I said, shocked myself after the half-second it took me to register what she meant. "No, certainly not. Just try to... If you can just break the hymen..." She looked down at her genitals. "Try with your fingers. Or if you need a stick or something..."


Slowly she moved a hand to her sex, head turned toward her work, but eyes up at first, looking at me, as if asking that I would let her do it without watching. I looked around to see what travelers were nearby, hoping we hadn't attracted a crowd yet. We hadn't, and with me squatting in front of her, it seemed no one had so far noticed what she was doing.

But I knew Quintus Laterus could arrive at any time. I wished she would hurry.

I heard her gasp and looked back to see her propped up on one arm, with two fingers up her vagina, biting her lip.

"Did you get it?"

"I'm... not sure," she winced, digging a little more, then withdrawing to sit there, labia spread as wide as her legs. There was no blood. She seemed discouraged, impatient.

"Do you want me to...?" She shook her head in frustration, tears spilling from her eyes.

"Just-- just do it. Use the end of the hammer and just..."

"Oh, the hammer is broad, we don't need to--"

"Just do it! Make it quick!" She turned her head to the side, and I felt I could only comply. With one hand I spread her labia wider, with the other I held the butt of the hammer at the opening into her body.

"Do you want to do it? It's right here..."

"No - do it!" Her face was an anguished grimace, concentrating on the ground beside her, waiting.

I hesitated one more moment, but no longer, knowing the wait was torture for her. I shoved hard and fast. She gasped loudly, then almost wretched. I pulled it back out quickly, then found a small cloth to absorb the trickle of blood as she panted, wet eyes wide. I wanted to apologize. She seemed angry - maybe not with me, exactly, but angry.

As she recovered, I patted up the last of the blood. Concentrating now on this part of her body, I noticed a mole at the top of her thigh, near her groin. I thought it seemed likely Quintus Laterus would notice it, and it crossed my mind to ask Heidi if it was reason enough to give up the whole idea. But it almost seemed unfair to bring it up now.

Then, without making eye contact, she lay back down and spread her arms again, offering herself up to be nailed.
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