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Now This Just Isn't Funny

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sympazero2

Cruciformae Studiosus
The French...
'Been a while since I posted this, it’s due…
(It may be new to you)

Around the turn of the last century, the French were
best known in the rest of the world for two things:

1)
Savate (kick-boxing) and
2)
Fellatio (no translation necessary?)

Which gave rise to the WWI triplet:

“The French they are a funny race…
they fight with their feet
and fuck with their face…”

tumblr_kuu9h4urbm1qzdi59o1_500AAAen.jpg

=================
 

phlebas

PRIMUS POENUS
Staff member
I like #6, #7 is weird and #8 is too true

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Rias

Neko Girl

Barbaria1

Rebel Leader
Staff member

Silent_Water

Governor
Mhm, working in a German hotel at the western borders of Germany at night during the last months, I have got the impression, we Germans found a totally new and very sophisticated way how to dominate all our neighbours by simply declaring "international risk areas" without detailed informations how long this will last:

1. We can simply use these declarations in order to threaten NOT to be visited by our rich German tourists and most European countries have already made diplomatic statements that it is a national catastrophe to be now on this German list (e.g. Luxembourg, Austria, Czech Republic, Spain, parts of France and the Netherlands - by the way "Loxuru": couldn't winter become dangerous for your country with the stormy North Sea in the West, Belgium on eternal holidays in the South and the "closing-down-everything-again-Germans" in the East? :eek: ;) ) :


2. This is the worst German "blacklist" I have ever heard of because you cannot do anything against it as long as Germany uses the official national statistics from the affected countries. Now, Luxembourg is already for the second time on this list and the tourists and businessmen do no more ask me via telephone at "my" hotel if they can still visit our hotel; they only ask: "Are we on this blacklist?" My answer: "Unfortunately YES, but if you have a doctor's confirmation not older than 48 hours that you are free from the coronavirus, you can visit us." Usual answer: "Forget about it! I had to visit Germany because of my businesses' customers within 24 hours and I cannot get a doctor's attest within the coming 12 hours! Bye!"

3. This could become the new German ("tourism") empire, because in spite of the coronavirus, our hotel is booked out almost every week-end! All German tourists are now forced by the RKI-"blacklist" to make holidays inside Germany and all nations on this list are blocked from visiting Germany. It is absolutely crazy but especially our hotel has truely so many guests like never before - 90 % from Germany who wanted to visit Canada, the USA, Spain, Egypt, Turkey in the autumn, fall, winter but they all say: "When I get sick, I will be treated in a German hospital because they look like the best in the world now!"

So, if you want to know the face and the typical gesture of our "New Healthy-Wealthy German Empire", it looks like this one on the following photo and because of the geographical situation of Germany in the center of Europe, we could block almost every country around us from every other neighbouring country. It is almost frightening that "we" remarked this only because of the coronavirus :eek: :facepalm: :eek::

Ashampoo_Snap_2020.09.28_22h03m41s_001_.jpg

 

Loxuru

Graf von Kreuzigung
by the way "Loxuru": couldn't winter become dangerous for your country with the stormy North Sea in the West, Belgium on eternal holidays in the South and the "closing-down-everything-again-Germans" in the East?
The most worrying prospect in that part of Europe is, that Belgium is about to have a real government for the first time since two years. It will raise the worry level in Belgium to 'indifferent', the higher levels being : 'not interested', 'I don't give a damn' and 'I do what I want'!:devil:
 

Silent_Water

Governor
I always loved this often self-centered Belgian look at the world after I had read some decades ago the Asterix comic ...
... in which the Belgian "Gastronomix" always thinks, he is on holiday in a club hotel and all the fights and quarrels around him in the Roman legion were just put up as an entertainment program for holiday makers like him - hm - I just read in the English version, it is the Egyptian, but I could swear, in the German version it is the Belgian. I must have a look as soon as possible into my old Asterix collection. The names are also very different, the Egyptian has the "German" name "Tennisplatzis", I think ...
:doh::eek::cool:
Mhm, when I really think it over, my own whole life seems to have been like that until now. I was working more in hotels than at home or at my birth place and I always felt like being on holiday and not really working up to now ...
I must have done something wrong in my life, I think ...
 
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fallenmystic

Governor
I think this manages to insult most of our European friends, for which I can only say

"Please can I have a visa, I need more beer and wine?"


View attachment 906824
Thanks for such an informative post. I was curious about how our European friends are faring in this pandemic crisis. In my country, we initially kept our alert state as “Bunker Rush” to contain the virus at the early stage. When it proved unsatisfactory, however, we had to increase the level to “Zergling All-in” so that we can deal with it utilizing all the resources we have.

Actually, Starcraft is no longer so popular in S. Korea as it once was. But I’m pretty sure the Germans don’t like wearing fancy uniforms as much as they once did either. :p
 

Eulalia

Poet Laureate
Staff member
just a case of pattern recognition under circumstances of dubious lighting ;)
I thought the dog's waiting for her to chop a finger or two off.

Remarkably overlooked here : the Dutch! They have no reason to increase their worry level (currently : "asjemenou!"), since they simply closed all their storm barriers and feel safe now.:D
so long as they don't take their fingers out
 
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