The invitation
Delivered by courier
embossed on fine paper
cordially invited to a festive
Boxing Day dinner
at Cruxton Abbey
8 pm, formal attire
signed, Sir Wragg
Flattered and eager
I dress to impress
daringly short red dress,
low neckline
red kinis and demi
thigh highs and heels
holiday ribbon in my hair
Arriving fashionably late
to impress
ushered in by
a rodent-faced butler
who takes my coat
“This way my dear
everyone is already here”
Table festively set with
fine linen, crystal and silver
everyone already seated
Sir Wragg, Tree, QP, Admi,
and Phlebas, Cruxlover,
Hondoboot2, rb1956, xso,
vulcan and Madiosi too
“Where is my place?”
I ask innocently
noting all space taken
and feeling a bit uneasy
“Am I too late?”
Silence and stares
from table round
“Yours is the place
of honor my dear”
says the rodent soothingly
“Come with me to
the end of the room
your cross awaits
affixed to the wall”
“What!” I exclaim
as my arms are pinioned
behind my back
and my dress
is forcibly removed
by the footmen
Gunner and Bull
I protest and struggle
as my stripping continues
first my bra
and then my kinis
heels are gone
but not my stockings
left for effect
Arms stretched out
wrists tightly bound
feet on small footrest
bound at the ankles
left to hang, twist and writhe
sputtering indignantly
at my unexpected plight
Dinner is over,
the guests light up
decanters of brandy,
Scotch and liquors
make the rounds
everyone leering and smirking
at my nearly naked crucified body
I can’t believe this
how could this have happened?
my holiday dinner invitation
to elegant Cruxton Abbey
turned so horribly
humiliatingly, embarrassingly
upside down, “the cads!”
Surely it’s a just a joke
they will soon take me down
hand me a robe
tell me it was all in fun
pour me a drink
call a taxi
send me home
But no
they all get up
from the table
say goodbyes
and cheerios
the room soon empty
save Gunner and Bull
Oh my God
a fate worse than death
not the two of them!
but wait, no,
it’s 12:50 am
it was all a bad dream
I’m home safe in my bed
So my friends I leave you with
this holiday tale posted on cf
my crazy holiday dream
of being invited on Boxing Day
by the good Sir Wragg
to dine in fine fashion
at Cruxton Abbey
Barbaria, 2014
Delivered by courier
embossed on fine paper
cordially invited to a festive
Boxing Day dinner
at Cruxton Abbey
8 pm, formal attire
signed, Sir Wragg
Flattered and eager
I dress to impress
daringly short red dress,
low neckline
red kinis and demi
thigh highs and heels
holiday ribbon in my hair
Arriving fashionably late
to impress
ushered in by
a rodent-faced butler
who takes my coat
“This way my dear
everyone is already here”
Table festively set with
fine linen, crystal and silver
everyone already seated
Sir Wragg, Tree, QP, Admi,
and Phlebas, Cruxlover,
Hondoboot2, rb1956, xso,
vulcan and Madiosi too
“Where is my place?”
I ask innocently
noting all space taken
and feeling a bit uneasy
“Am I too late?”
Silence and stares
from table round
“Yours is the place
of honor my dear”
says the rodent soothingly
“Come with me to
the end of the room
your cross awaits
affixed to the wall”
“What!” I exclaim
as my arms are pinioned
behind my back
and my dress
is forcibly removed
by the footmen
Gunner and Bull
I protest and struggle
as my stripping continues
first my bra
and then my kinis
heels are gone
but not my stockings
left for effect
Arms stretched out
wrists tightly bound
feet on small footrest
bound at the ankles
left to hang, twist and writhe
sputtering indignantly
at my unexpected plight
Dinner is over,
the guests light up
decanters of brandy,
Scotch and liquors
make the rounds
everyone leering and smirking
at my nearly naked crucified body
I can’t believe this
how could this have happened?
my holiday dinner invitation
to elegant Cruxton Abbey
turned so horribly
humiliatingly, embarrassingly
upside down, “the cads!”
Surely it’s a just a joke
they will soon take me down
hand me a robe
tell me it was all in fun
pour me a drink
call a taxi
send me home
But no
they all get up
from the table
say goodbyes
and cheerios
the room soon empty
save Gunner and Bull
Oh my God
a fate worse than death
not the two of them!
but wait, no,
it’s 12:50 am
it was all a bad dream
I’m home safe in my bed
So my friends I leave you with
this holiday tale posted on cf
my crazy holiday dream
of being invited on Boxing Day
by the good Sir Wragg
to dine in fine fashion
at Cruxton Abbey
Barbaria, 2014
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