Let us wrap up the sad tale of Tricia and her lovers Barbara and Siss and the horrific ordeal they suffered at the hands of Tree and his barbarians…
Usually we dump the bodies in a pit and bury them the unmarked grave. I was wrapping up breakfast with Saul the palace guard captain on the late queen’s garden patio when behind us we hear someone approaching on the leaf-covered path. I turn and find a rather attractive woman in a strange black outfit.
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When Saul sees her he exclaims “Constance, what are you doing here?”
She shoots him an icy glare then says “I am
Sister Constance. Sir may I approach?”
I shrug and say “Sure, who are you the sister of?”
“I have no sister- I am a nun of Order of Penance and Punishment?”
“What are you ‘none’ of?” I asked confused by this.
“She belongs to a religious group of women” Saul explains. “They take the prefix ‘Sister’ to their names and are called nuns collectively.”
“Whatever- what can I do for you?”
“My order has burned the bodies of monarchs over time on a funeral pyre. I request you allow us to do so with Queen Tricia’s body and those of her handmaidens.”
“She wasn’t a queen when I crucified her. What do you have to offer me?”
“I have taken a vow of poverty. All I have to offer is this” she says as she raises the garment.
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Though quite tempting I gruffly say “I can take that if I want without your permission.”
“I have no doubt, sir but consider that I have sworn to be chaste yet I willingly offer my body to you” she says as she lowers the bottom of garment.
“Come closer” I order her. I look at the neckless she wears and say “You are already forging tributes of Queen Tricia.
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Indignantly she says “I hate to inform you crucifixion has been around long before you were born. This is Jeesa Christiana, the daughter of God who we worship!”
This woman must be insane thinking that Jesus was a woman (Yes, I’ve even heard about Him, but I didn’t think a nun would be a ‘birther’ nut) but I am not going to be fucking what is between her ears. I order her to strip. Saul rises to leave and I order him to stay. I lay the naked nun on the patio and fuck her right there in front of Saul. I steal a glance at him and see has turned his head away. This nun is hardly a virgin and I suspect she hasn’t even been good at being chaste lately either as she begins howling “Oh, yes… yes…
harder!!!”
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As I climb off her I she I see Bull and Gunner standing nearby and order them to bind her. I look at her looking back wide-eyed at my order. I growl “Listen ‘Sister’, I knew what a nun is and you ain’t a nun. You are younger than Barb and Siss. I suspect you are Tricia’s daughter!”
“No, I am not” Sister Constance exclaims as Saul takes a step towards me starting to draw his sword. He stops as Bull and Gunner step between him and me with their much larger swords already drawn.
I look at Constance and say “You would turn on your mother. And you, Saul, I have treated you fairly. How would your wife and children like to learn this bitch is Tricia’s and your love child? But I am a man of my word. Dear Sister Constance offered herself to me so the crucified wenches could have a proper funeral as so they shall. As for you Constance you will watch it nailed to the same cross you mother died upon but as you hang from it be mindful you are no monarch and will be buried in a pit not to be found!”
-The Barbarian Tree
The sisters of the Order of Penance and Punishment were indeed allowed to lay Tricia, Siss, and Barbara in state but Tree refused to allow Tricia’s former subjects to view the bodies.
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The nuns spent the day gathering wood for the pyres while Constance knelt bound watching the palace guards dig up the cross her mother died upon.
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The cornu would be removed- she would not be afforded a swift death! Saul oversees the preparation of Constance’s crucifixion with tear-filled eyes. He had a choice of doing so or his wife would become a widow and his children fatherless. It is odd where loyalties lie.
Late afternoon Constance is unbound and the palace guards that protected her through her childhood now drag the young woman to her mother’s cross.
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Shortly after sunset the pyres are lit. Constance watches from her raised cross. Beyond the pain she suffers she becomes sick from the sight of her mother’s and two women that that helped raise her bodies’ boil and burst on the fires and the incredible stench of burning bodies.
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From here the story gets a bit cloudy. Some contend the young Constance took three days to die crucified while others contend she was rescued from the cross and became the elf-warrior Connie.
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Either one could be a parable or maybe even fact. What is known that a sterling silver statue of Queen Tricia was made and mounted to a wooden cross. You can find it on a hill over Eastwick, near the village of Little Brampton. Every year the presumed anniversary of Queen Tricia’s death the figure is adorned with a loincloth and crown thorns by the nuns of the Order of Penance and Punishment.
It’s not really accurate but no one seems to care and the college fraternities and sororities seem to enjoy seeing who can steal the cloth and crown first…
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FIN
Tree