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Crucified?

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This is about how I am crucified in my attic. I hope to find a place to do it securely outdoors this summer.

I think the gag is an error. When I am crucified, the pain makes me moan and sometimes cry out, and I think that's part of the pleasure of both the crucified one and her audience.
Tree must visit Veronika's attic!!!
 
I could provide a cross.
The cross itself is not the most difficult; we must first find a secure place to do it, far from the paths, because I moan and can shout in pain when on the cross. Also, if possible, in a nice place, I would like to be surrounded by nature's beauty while on my cross.
 
Das Kreuz selbst ist nicht das schwierigste; Wir müssen dafür zunächst einen sicheren Ort finden, weit weg von den Wegen, denn am Kreuz stöhne ich und kann vor Schmerz schreien. Außerdem möchte ich, wenn möglich, an einem schönen Ort, während meines Kreuzes von der Schönheit der Natur umgeben se
The cross itself is not the most difficult; we must first find a secure place to do it, far from the paths, because I moan and can shout in pain when on the cross. Also, if possible, in a nice place, I would like to be surrounded by nature's beauty while on my cros
We have enough beautiful nature here. We are surrounded by it. I live in a village in Germany / Thuringia. A place far away from the roads shouldn't be a problem either. We would just have to put the cross somewhere else.
 
We have enough beautiful nature here. We are surrounded by it. I live in a village in Germany / Thuringia. A place far away from the roads shouldn't be a problem either. We would just have to put the cross somewhere else.
Kind of you but I want to do it at "home" in Italy, we also have mountains and forests :)
 
I'd crucify you if I was around :). I have a nice 50ft long rope
Since I am involved in crucifixion, as a girl, I discovered here (but also on DFN before coming here) that you just have to ask to get so many guys ready to help you!!! :) :) Life is great, isn't it? ;) :)
 
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