RacingRodent
Consul
A bouncing Princes no doubt 
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The Lotus Smiles
- Thread starter messaline
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RacingRodent
Consul
Good moment, RR - I enjoyed that
Thanks...always important to look on the bright side of life in the torturer's profession
messaline
Crucified Amazon
RacingRodent
Consul
Episode 6 the exciting night life of Venice’s Racing Rascals
Paskai Lin was fast, she knew it. She needed to be to get to the baker’s window, lift off the tray of pies, pass it up to her friends on the roof and then run across the plank bridge to the other side of the narrow canal and clamber up the opposing wall before the huffing puffing fat little apprentices and their master could catch her. Upon the rooftops she then needed to be fast. Not to escape the now thwarted pursuit but to join back up with the boys before they ate all the pies.
“Oh come on,” Said Ruffeo and Paskai pulled away the last remaining portion before he could cram it into his bulging pastry filled mouth, “You get to eat every day.”
“Rules are rules,” Said Paskai, “You said when I joined in the gang I got an equal share of the loot and this is the loot.”
The boys looked mutinous but unsure of themselves. It was a well-known fact that without Paskai more of them would have ended up serving time in one of the Republic’s war galleys patrolling the Adriatic and there would have been less loot but on the other hand she was of noble birth and rich parentage. A lot of young nobles ran with the street gangs for sport but for them it would always be a sport and nothing more. The poorer boys and sometimes girls were trying to set up a life in the Republic that increasingly seemed only concerned with the needs of its rich.
“Yes but soon you’ll be married and we…well we will need to work hard or score big before we even think of getting married,” Complained Matteo.
“I am so not getting married,” Frowned Paskai, “Besides mother seems to think all men are beneath me.” She was not entirely decided as to whether she liked that. True she did not want to actually become a wife but some of the wealthy young aristocrats who wanted to dance with her were nice, if only they did not get so nervous the instant Mingyu patted the steel pins in her hair, the ones that looked like deadly knives because in fact they were deadly knives.
“Shush all of you, I think I see something,” Called Franco who had look at this time, well he had look out most times, he was not as agile as the rest but he had good eyes. Everyone went quiet and waited. The gangs were not the only ones to use the roofs and so of those others did objected to sharing the highways above the alleys and the canals.
Everyone peered into the haze of the city. Venice had hundreds of fires going from small lamps to the great forges of the Arsenal, each and every last one adding their plume to the smoky air, when the mists rolled in off the lagoon it became a fierce smog but right now it was just a haze, persistent, unpleasant but above the heads of most sensible citizens. The gang waited and waited for whatever or whomever Franco had spotted to reveal themselves or move on.
“Exactly what did you see Franco?” Asked Ruffeo after a long while.
“I dunno, something,” Said Franco disconsolately, even he was beginning to feel a little foolish now, it was clear.
“Oh probably just a bird or a cat after a bird,” Someone said and they all relaxed.
“Hey let’s see if we can grab some beer from the hostellers near the Church of Saint Francis, they normally take delivery right now, you never know we might get lucky as they sometimes take in those big clay jugs,” Suggested Matteo and with that the group set off again, its sprits cleansed from the fear of just moments before.
Perhaps that fear might have better kept them alive. They were reclining on a rooftop passing ever lighter jugs of beer between them when Paskai noticed strange sounds. They seemed like the chink of metal but dulled as if she was hearing them underwater. She wondered if perhaps she was a bit more drunk than she thought, the boys always called her a lightweight when she heard more of the sounds, just below the eaves of the roof in front of then and from the other side of the incline behind them.
“Careful, there are armed men approaching and they have us surrounded,” Paskai sprang to her feet, “Quickly, we must flee!”
“What, the Watch never come up after us here they just stand in the street and shout,” Laughed Ruffeo.
“Not the Watch, someone, else, now run,” Paskai started off, noticed the others were not following and turned around to warn them but it was too late. A swarm of armed men, small and wiry, all looking somewhat wizened and jaundiced compared to the natives of the Republic appeared from atop the spine of the roof and swinging with impossible athleticism over the eaves.
Bright blades shone in their hands and the boys had no chance. Paskai screamed as metal flashed and the boys screamed as blood spurted. Only then did she realise she must run for her own life. She turned and agile as a goat skipped over to the next roof and then ran along shattering slates before leaping on to the next. She was attempting a third when the weighted night swamped her and brought her crashing perilously over the edge.
She was caught for a long terrifying moment above a narrow pavement next to a small flow off one of the main canals. If she dropped her head would either smash like an egg or her neck snap and then she would disappear into the murky waters to be either eaten by fish or dragged out the next day by the Canal Watch.
Then in nausea inducing jerks she was hauled an inch at a time back up on to the roof. A half dozen round yellow faces leered down at her and in a language she had half learned from her mother and grandmother the men babbled questions about what to do with her. Then one reached through the net and yanked up her top baring her breasts to the night.
“Oh we kill her as ordered but first let’s have some fun,” He smiled most evilly.
To Be Continued
Paskai Lin was fast, she knew it. She needed to be to get to the baker’s window, lift off the tray of pies, pass it up to her friends on the roof and then run across the plank bridge to the other side of the narrow canal and clamber up the opposing wall before the huffing puffing fat little apprentices and their master could catch her. Upon the rooftops she then needed to be fast. Not to escape the now thwarted pursuit but to join back up with the boys before they ate all the pies.
“Oh come on,” Said Ruffeo and Paskai pulled away the last remaining portion before he could cram it into his bulging pastry filled mouth, “You get to eat every day.”
“Rules are rules,” Said Paskai, “You said when I joined in the gang I got an equal share of the loot and this is the loot.”
The boys looked mutinous but unsure of themselves. It was a well-known fact that without Paskai more of them would have ended up serving time in one of the Republic’s war galleys patrolling the Adriatic and there would have been less loot but on the other hand she was of noble birth and rich parentage. A lot of young nobles ran with the street gangs for sport but for them it would always be a sport and nothing more. The poorer boys and sometimes girls were trying to set up a life in the Republic that increasingly seemed only concerned with the needs of its rich.
“Yes but soon you’ll be married and we…well we will need to work hard or score big before we even think of getting married,” Complained Matteo.
“I am so not getting married,” Frowned Paskai, “Besides mother seems to think all men are beneath me.” She was not entirely decided as to whether she liked that. True she did not want to actually become a wife but some of the wealthy young aristocrats who wanted to dance with her were nice, if only they did not get so nervous the instant Mingyu patted the steel pins in her hair, the ones that looked like deadly knives because in fact they were deadly knives.
“Shush all of you, I think I see something,” Called Franco who had look at this time, well he had look out most times, he was not as agile as the rest but he had good eyes. Everyone went quiet and waited. The gangs were not the only ones to use the roofs and so of those others did objected to sharing the highways above the alleys and the canals.
Everyone peered into the haze of the city. Venice had hundreds of fires going from small lamps to the great forges of the Arsenal, each and every last one adding their plume to the smoky air, when the mists rolled in off the lagoon it became a fierce smog but right now it was just a haze, persistent, unpleasant but above the heads of most sensible citizens. The gang waited and waited for whatever or whomever Franco had spotted to reveal themselves or move on.
“Exactly what did you see Franco?” Asked Ruffeo after a long while.
“I dunno, something,” Said Franco disconsolately, even he was beginning to feel a little foolish now, it was clear.
“Oh probably just a bird or a cat after a bird,” Someone said and they all relaxed.
“Hey let’s see if we can grab some beer from the hostellers near the Church of Saint Francis, they normally take delivery right now, you never know we might get lucky as they sometimes take in those big clay jugs,” Suggested Matteo and with that the group set off again, its sprits cleansed from the fear of just moments before.
Perhaps that fear might have better kept them alive. They were reclining on a rooftop passing ever lighter jugs of beer between them when Paskai noticed strange sounds. They seemed like the chink of metal but dulled as if she was hearing them underwater. She wondered if perhaps she was a bit more drunk than she thought, the boys always called her a lightweight when she heard more of the sounds, just below the eaves of the roof in front of then and from the other side of the incline behind them.
“Careful, there are armed men approaching and they have us surrounded,” Paskai sprang to her feet, “Quickly, we must flee!”
“What, the Watch never come up after us here they just stand in the street and shout,” Laughed Ruffeo.
“Not the Watch, someone, else, now run,” Paskai started off, noticed the others were not following and turned around to warn them but it was too late. A swarm of armed men, small and wiry, all looking somewhat wizened and jaundiced compared to the natives of the Republic appeared from atop the spine of the roof and swinging with impossible athleticism over the eaves.
Bright blades shone in their hands and the boys had no chance. Paskai screamed as metal flashed and the boys screamed as blood spurted. Only then did she realise she must run for her own life. She turned and agile as a goat skipped over to the next roof and then ran along shattering slates before leaping on to the next. She was attempting a third when the weighted night swamped her and brought her crashing perilously over the edge.
She was caught for a long terrifying moment above a narrow pavement next to a small flow off one of the main canals. If she dropped her head would either smash like an egg or her neck snap and then she would disappear into the murky waters to be either eaten by fish or dragged out the next day by the Canal Watch.
Then in nausea inducing jerks she was hauled an inch at a time back up on to the roof. A half dozen round yellow faces leered down at her and in a language she had half learned from her mother and grandmother the men babbled questions about what to do with her. Then one reached through the net and yanked up her top baring her breasts to the night.
“Oh we kill her as ordered but first let’s have some fun,” He smiled most evilly.
To Be Continued
RacingRodent
Consul
Thank you My Princess and thank you for your art which brings the story all the more vividly to life
RacingRodent
Consul
Episode 7 blood and steel in Venice
Mingyu looked up at the first screams. They were quickly followed by more as the servants who had errands and chores closest to the street front were swiftly overwhelmed. The sounds of marginally less desperate cries and ringing steel signalled that the mercenaries employed by the House of Polo were at last reacting to the attack as too were other retainers. Mingyu though doubted that they would do much good. The attack from the street was all too likely a diversion to cover the infiltration of other assassins. She must get to her weapons.
Leaving her rooms she hurried down a passage to the armoury. Suddenly two men dropped through a window and rolled upright with bared swords. Mingyu took in their garb, silk tops and broad slightly saucer shaped wicker work hats, they were clearly veterans of some underground society or another though as to which Tong they belonged was a mystery and hardly relevant here.
“Please I am unarmed,” Mingyu cowed against a wall and begged.
“Oh Your Highness that will just make this more fun,” Sneered one man, revealing he knew exactly who his target was and reaching for Mingyu with his free hand as his friend came over to join him.
“Yes, for me,” Mingyu smiled as she snatched her hairpin daggers and rammed them into two surprised throats. The men slide boneless to the floor and Mingyu snatched up their swords as a cascade of their allies suddenly poured up the stairs from the ground floor. Behind her the door to the armoury slammed wide open and Mingyu had a sudden horror that she was surrounded.
“Behind me, watch my back while I take care of these rogues,” Commanded Messaline of Jin striding out in her armour.
“But Grand Mere,” Protested Mingyu as she looked in surprise at the old lady.
“That is Your Imperial Highness Grand Mere to you and unless you have some armour hidden under your house robes I shall take the lead,” Messaline did not even pause speaking as she took the first ringing clash of steel against her own blades.
A man went down before Messaline but another darted around her as two more came up to hold her attention to the front. Mingyu parried aside the Tong’s blade with one of her own and gelded him with the other, a stamp of a well-trained foot snapped his neck as he lay sobbing on the floorboards.
“But Paskai,” Mingyu suddenly realised with horror.
“I have sent Li’hi and some old friends to look to her safety, this attack was not entirely unexpected,” Messaline sniffed in between a like ballet of thrust and parry, “I was warned of ruffians with an Old Country air arriving in the Republic but did not expect so many guests as this.”
Just then even more Tongs crashed in through the window joining the ones who had fought their way up from below. Outside the bells of Venice were ringing, summoning City Guards and such militia as cared to join in to meet some unexpected foreign lawbreakers.
Inside the House of Polo things were becoming desperate. There was little room for manoeuvre and while Messaline created a wall of steel between them and the stairs Mingyu was desperately fending off Tongs who had penetrated the upper reaches of the house.
Behind the ranks of swordsmen some of the Tongs were shooting small crossbows whose wicked darts were hard enough to see let alone avoid. Soon Messaline bristled like a porcupine and yet still she fought.
Then suddenly the pressure eased. Wielding glaives with savage abandon a varied mob of soldiers of the Republic including House Polo guards tore into the rear of the Tongs. Now it was the turn of Chinese hitmen to go down under crossbow bolts as those looking to escape via the windows found their rooftop escape cut off by the reinforcements from the city of Venice.
Messaline swayed and Mingyu and several soldiers caught her and eased her to the floor.
“Tell, tell me when you have news of Paskai,” Said Messaline and then passed out blood trickling from the side of her mouth.
Away from the scene of carnage Paskai was thrashing about with all the fury she could muster but it did no good, her clothing was progressively stripped from her body.
“Fight all you want little bird, no one is coming to save you, soon all your family will be dead,” Sneered one of the Tongs in half understood Chinese though his was complicated by being a very different dialect from the ones Paskai had sort of learned.
She looked at him with hate and then spat in his face. He laughed wiped the spittle from his nose and lips and then pushed those same fingers deep into the cleft between Paskai’s legs though she tried both writhing and clenching to keep him out, just when she felt it could get no worse it did as she felt her loins burn with sudden pain and go wet. The man laughed as he withdrew bloody fingers, “Seems I just scooped out your virginity my dear well don’t worry, we’ll see you off to heaven with a sound knowledge of what it feels like to have a man between your thighs.” He dropped his trousers to his ankles and leered and his manhood sprouted repulsively from a ragged thicket of hair.
To Be Continued
Mingyu looked up at the first screams. They were quickly followed by more as the servants who had errands and chores closest to the street front were swiftly overwhelmed. The sounds of marginally less desperate cries and ringing steel signalled that the mercenaries employed by the House of Polo were at last reacting to the attack as too were other retainers. Mingyu though doubted that they would do much good. The attack from the street was all too likely a diversion to cover the infiltration of other assassins. She must get to her weapons.
Leaving her rooms she hurried down a passage to the armoury. Suddenly two men dropped through a window and rolled upright with bared swords. Mingyu took in their garb, silk tops and broad slightly saucer shaped wicker work hats, they were clearly veterans of some underground society or another though as to which Tong they belonged was a mystery and hardly relevant here.
“Please I am unarmed,” Mingyu cowed against a wall and begged.
“Oh Your Highness that will just make this more fun,” Sneered one man, revealing he knew exactly who his target was and reaching for Mingyu with his free hand as his friend came over to join him.
“Yes, for me,” Mingyu smiled as she snatched her hairpin daggers and rammed them into two surprised throats. The men slide boneless to the floor and Mingyu snatched up their swords as a cascade of their allies suddenly poured up the stairs from the ground floor. Behind her the door to the armoury slammed wide open and Mingyu had a sudden horror that she was surrounded.
“Behind me, watch my back while I take care of these rogues,” Commanded Messaline of Jin striding out in her armour.
“But Grand Mere,” Protested Mingyu as she looked in surprise at the old lady.
“That is Your Imperial Highness Grand Mere to you and unless you have some armour hidden under your house robes I shall take the lead,” Messaline did not even pause speaking as she took the first ringing clash of steel against her own blades.
A man went down before Messaline but another darted around her as two more came up to hold her attention to the front. Mingyu parried aside the Tong’s blade with one of her own and gelded him with the other, a stamp of a well-trained foot snapped his neck as he lay sobbing on the floorboards.
“But Paskai,” Mingyu suddenly realised with horror.
“I have sent Li’hi and some old friends to look to her safety, this attack was not entirely unexpected,” Messaline sniffed in between a like ballet of thrust and parry, “I was warned of ruffians with an Old Country air arriving in the Republic but did not expect so many guests as this.”
Just then even more Tongs crashed in through the window joining the ones who had fought their way up from below. Outside the bells of Venice were ringing, summoning City Guards and such militia as cared to join in to meet some unexpected foreign lawbreakers.
Inside the House of Polo things were becoming desperate. There was little room for manoeuvre and while Messaline created a wall of steel between them and the stairs Mingyu was desperately fending off Tongs who had penetrated the upper reaches of the house.
Behind the ranks of swordsmen some of the Tongs were shooting small crossbows whose wicked darts were hard enough to see let alone avoid. Soon Messaline bristled like a porcupine and yet still she fought.
Then suddenly the pressure eased. Wielding glaives with savage abandon a varied mob of soldiers of the Republic including House Polo guards tore into the rear of the Tongs. Now it was the turn of Chinese hitmen to go down under crossbow bolts as those looking to escape via the windows found their rooftop escape cut off by the reinforcements from the city of Venice.
Messaline swayed and Mingyu and several soldiers caught her and eased her to the floor.
“Tell, tell me when you have news of Paskai,” Said Messaline and then passed out blood trickling from the side of her mouth.
Away from the scene of carnage Paskai was thrashing about with all the fury she could muster but it did no good, her clothing was progressively stripped from her body.
“Fight all you want little bird, no one is coming to save you, soon all your family will be dead,” Sneered one of the Tongs in half understood Chinese though his was complicated by being a very different dialect from the ones Paskai had sort of learned.
She looked at him with hate and then spat in his face. He laughed wiped the spittle from his nose and lips and then pushed those same fingers deep into the cleft between Paskai’s legs though she tried both writhing and clenching to keep him out, just when she felt it could get no worse it did as she felt her loins burn with sudden pain and go wet. The man laughed as he withdrew bloody fingers, “Seems I just scooped out your virginity my dear well don’t worry, we’ll see you off to heaven with a sound knowledge of what it feels like to have a man between your thighs.” He dropped his trousers to his ankles and leered and his manhood sprouted repulsively from a ragged thicket of hair.
To Be Continued
RacingRodent
Consul
Episode 8 Loss of innocence and a new life
“No don’t touch me, no you must not, leave me alone,” Screamed Paskai as the Tong knelt between her legs while his friends pinned her to the cold roof tiles.
“Oh I am going to touch you little girl, I am going to touch you inside where you have never been touched before,” The man laughed and spat blood into Paskai’s face.
It took a moment but then it dawned on everyone he had not meant to do that. The look of horror now showed where before was a smile and his once rampant manhood wilted as his bowels opened and stool cascaded between his legs. Paskai screamed again as the hot, wet stinking matter splashed on her thighs and then without a word her tormentor was gone, fallen to the ground perilously far below.
Everyone looked up, a figure all in black stood a little beyond the space that the Tong chief had occupied and two of his allies lay at her feet. They were on their chest and yet they still looked up to her as she has twisted their necks like those of chickens.
“I think you should release My Honourable Lady,” Said the woman removing her mask to reveal fine oriental features and a cascade of black hair.
“I think not…” Said one of the men and Paskai felt a blade press against her throat only to be released and fall harmlessly across her chest as the man sprouted a steel hilt from his eye and toppled backwards.
Another Tong drew his sword and leapt before spinning off the roof to land with a clatter and wet thud below.
“I…”Said the last Tong and another hilt seemed to spring from his chest, “…Surrender,” He managed and then died.
“We have dealt with the others,” Said another female voice, “The Lady Li’Hi awaits the Honourable Lady below.” More figures in black appeared and reported to the woman who stood before Paskai.
“Clean I want to be clean,” Wanting to be strong Paskai wept as she took in the blood and filth covering her.
“Of course Honourable Lady, we shall fetch water and clothes for you,” The woman nodded to two of the near shadows who sprang away to give actions to her words, “I am called Jade Shadow, I have the honour to hold the rank of Captain in the Order of the Night Hunters,” She continued, “We serve the Most High Lady Messaline and are bidden to bring you to her.”
Paskai hugged Li’hi when they saw one and another and clung to her grandmere’s companion with all her strength. She knew that when she was home everything would be all right. Except it was not, nothing was.
“Come closer child,” Messaline beckoned her from where she lay pale upon the floor surrounded by a good chunk of her family.
“No,” Paskai, hissed, “No,” she said again but she still stepped closer, “You cannot be dying,” She recoiled and approached again to hold Messaline’s hand.
“But I am, alas this attack was aimed at you and your mother, you have enemies,” Messaline said simply.
“But whom?” Asked Mingyu and Marco Polo almost in unison.
“Someone in the Court of the Great Khan most likely, we hear the whispers of turmoil from those distant lands, the time would be ripe for a Princess of good blood, the blood of Jin and Song to claim her birth right,” Messaline told them.
“But I don’t want to go back to China,” Said Mingyu even as her daughter was likewise speaking,
“I don’t want to be a princess,” Said Paskai.
“What you want cannot change what you are,” Messaline coughed up some blood and then continued, “The best way to keep you safe if the threat of one of you returning without actually provoking matters by sending you into the dragon’s maw, Li’hi you will accompany Jade Shadow and young Paskai to the secret Ninja temple in Tibet.”
Now it was Li’hi who objected, “But I don’t want to go to Tibet, I want to remain by your side,” She took Messaline’s hands in her hers.
“I will be there in spirit and you may remain by my side while I live, for it shall not be much longer, now you will all agree to do as I command, so I may give you my blessing,” Messaline told them firmly even as her face grey yet more pale and grey. Though they all wept they all agreed and so as she headed towards the gates of heaven Messaline left them with a smile.
“No don’t touch me, no you must not, leave me alone,” Screamed Paskai as the Tong knelt between her legs while his friends pinned her to the cold roof tiles.
“Oh I am going to touch you little girl, I am going to touch you inside where you have never been touched before,” The man laughed and spat blood into Paskai’s face.
It took a moment but then it dawned on everyone he had not meant to do that. The look of horror now showed where before was a smile and his once rampant manhood wilted as his bowels opened and stool cascaded between his legs. Paskai screamed again as the hot, wet stinking matter splashed on her thighs and then without a word her tormentor was gone, fallen to the ground perilously far below.
Everyone looked up, a figure all in black stood a little beyond the space that the Tong chief had occupied and two of his allies lay at her feet. They were on their chest and yet they still looked up to her as she has twisted their necks like those of chickens.
“I think you should release My Honourable Lady,” Said the woman removing her mask to reveal fine oriental features and a cascade of black hair.
“I think not…” Said one of the men and Paskai felt a blade press against her throat only to be released and fall harmlessly across her chest as the man sprouted a steel hilt from his eye and toppled backwards.
Another Tong drew his sword and leapt before spinning off the roof to land with a clatter and wet thud below.
“I…”Said the last Tong and another hilt seemed to spring from his chest, “…Surrender,” He managed and then died.
“We have dealt with the others,” Said another female voice, “The Lady Li’Hi awaits the Honourable Lady below.” More figures in black appeared and reported to the woman who stood before Paskai.
“Clean I want to be clean,” Wanting to be strong Paskai wept as she took in the blood and filth covering her.
“Of course Honourable Lady, we shall fetch water and clothes for you,” The woman nodded to two of the near shadows who sprang away to give actions to her words, “I am called Jade Shadow, I have the honour to hold the rank of Captain in the Order of the Night Hunters,” She continued, “We serve the Most High Lady Messaline and are bidden to bring you to her.”
Paskai hugged Li’hi when they saw one and another and clung to her grandmere’s companion with all her strength. She knew that when she was home everything would be all right. Except it was not, nothing was.
“Come closer child,” Messaline beckoned her from where she lay pale upon the floor surrounded by a good chunk of her family.
“No,” Paskai, hissed, “No,” she said again but she still stepped closer, “You cannot be dying,” She recoiled and approached again to hold Messaline’s hand.
“But I am, alas this attack was aimed at you and your mother, you have enemies,” Messaline said simply.
“But whom?” Asked Mingyu and Marco Polo almost in unison.
“Someone in the Court of the Great Khan most likely, we hear the whispers of turmoil from those distant lands, the time would be ripe for a Princess of good blood, the blood of Jin and Song to claim her birth right,” Messaline told them.
“But I don’t want to go back to China,” Said Mingyu even as her daughter was likewise speaking,
“I don’t want to be a princess,” Said Paskai.
“What you want cannot change what you are,” Messaline coughed up some blood and then continued, “The best way to keep you safe if the threat of one of you returning without actually provoking matters by sending you into the dragon’s maw, Li’hi you will accompany Jade Shadow and young Paskai to the secret Ninja temple in Tibet.”
Now it was Li’hi who objected, “But I don’t want to go to Tibet, I want to remain by your side,” She took Messaline’s hands in her hers.
“I will be there in spirit and you may remain by my side while I live, for it shall not be much longer, now you will all agree to do as I command, so I may give you my blessing,” Messaline told them firmly even as her face grey yet more pale and grey. Though they all wept they all agreed and so as she headed towards the gates of heaven Messaline left them with a smile.
To Be Continued
messaline
Crucified Amazon
RacingRodent
Consul
Indeed I am hugely grateful for not merely the pictures but many of the best ideas in this story are contributed our own (and very much alive) Messaline
Last edited:
messaline
Crucified Amazon
Attachments
You make me happy !
First gif ? NO, the second one ...!
Haha, just wasted a Kleenex trying to wipe that off my screen
AwwwwIf you wipe the second, never I'll do any "bisou" , nah !
And Mrs Wragg wants to know why I just kissed my laptop