A man and his wife were driving through Arkansas on their way from New York to California.
Looking at his fuel gauge, the man decided to stop and the next gasoline station and fill up.
"What can I do fer y'all?" the attendant asked.
"Fill it with supreme," the man said.
While the attendant was filling the tank, he looked the car up, down and sideways. "What kinda car is dis here?" he asked. "I never seen one like it before."
"It's a brand new Cadillac," the driver said proudly. "It has power steering, power seats, power sun roof, power mirrors, AM/FM radio with a CD player, an 8-speaker stereo, rack and pinion steering, disk brakes, leather interior, digital instruments..."
"Wow," said the attendant. "That there's the fanciest car I ever did see."
"How much do I owe you?" asked the driver when the attendant had finished.
"That'll be $30.25," he replied.
The driver pulled out his money clip and peeled off a $20 and a $10.
Then he went into his pocket and pulled out a handful of change.
Mixed in with the change were a few golf tees.
"What're them little things there?" asked the attendant.
"That's what I put my balls on when I drive," said the man.
"Goodness," said the attendant. "Them Cadillac people think of everything."
Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant.
While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation.
Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough.
After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress.
One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, Kin ya swallar?'
The woman shakes her head no.
Then he asks, 'Kin ya breathe?'
The woman begins to turn blue, and shakes her head no.
The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers, and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.
The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm, and the obstruction flies out of her mouth.
As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table.
His partner says, 'Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver' but I ain't niver seed nobody do it!'
Looking at his fuel gauge, the man decided to stop and the next gasoline station and fill up.
"What can I do fer y'all?" the attendant asked.
"Fill it with supreme," the man said.
While the attendant was filling the tank, he looked the car up, down and sideways. "What kinda car is dis here?" he asked. "I never seen one like it before."
"It's a brand new Cadillac," the driver said proudly. "It has power steering, power seats, power sun roof, power mirrors, AM/FM radio with a CD player, an 8-speaker stereo, rack and pinion steering, disk brakes, leather interior, digital instruments..."
"Wow," said the attendant. "That there's the fanciest car I ever did see."
"How much do I owe you?" asked the driver when the attendant had finished.
"That'll be $30.25," he replied.
The driver pulled out his money clip and peeled off a $20 and a $10.
Then he went into his pocket and pulled out a handful of change.
Mixed in with the change were a few golf tees.
"What're them little things there?" asked the attendant.
"That's what I put my balls on when I drive," said the man.
"Goodness," said the attendant. "Them Cadillac people think of everything."
Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant.
While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation.
Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough.
After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress.
One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, Kin ya swallar?'
The woman shakes her head no.
Then he asks, 'Kin ya breathe?'
The woman begins to turn blue, and shakes her head no.
The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers, and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.
The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm, and the obstruction flies out of her mouth.
As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table.
His partner says, 'Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver' but I ain't niver seed nobody do it!'
)
