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Overwhelming Desires

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Eulalia said:
I've had fantasies about going through all the experiences that Jesus went through -
scourging, humiliation, via crucis, nailing, thirst and agony on the Cross,
ever since I first heard about them in detail when I was about 12 -
and I imagine lots of additional cruelties being inflicted on me as I'm a woman.

But of course I couldn't experience all - hardly any - of that in real life,
'crux play' for me is too far from the real thing,
but I enjoy other kinds of play that arouse similar sensations -
bondage, whipping, just being a slavegirl ....

I don't think I'm out of my mind -
of course I worried about these strange desires for many years,
and my sub/ masochist nature didn't make for successful relationships with men,
who either failed to understand or simply exploited my nature,
but I've come to terms with those feelings and am at ease with myself now,
and this lovely Crux-Community has helped me a lot!

flower1
​
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Me too Eul....i will b crazy if i hvnt landed here, Our beloved CF zone..n met Siss n all of u...we r a family of crux..:) It is so lucky i found this place...:)
n all of YOU...:)
 
Yupar said:
Me too Eul....i will b crazy if i hvnt landed here, Our beloved CF zone..n met Siss n all of u...we r a family of crux..:) It is so lucky i found this place...:)
n all of YOU...:)
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You make me so much better each day ... knowing I helped you !!!

Kisses Yupar! flower1

The world is so much better when we look for friends. :)
 
LittleSiss said:
So true Messa, Self crux is all about checking and testing and making sure all is right and then starting over until you feel that is all set correctly.

Still there is only you and it will always be just short of what you are striving to experience.
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messaline said:
How can you say that after having said that is dangerous!
YOU MUST SAY: "NEVER NAILS IN REALITY !!!":mad:



Never you can say to a novice to begin with SELF-CRUCIFIXION!
It's too dangerous if she'hasn't read something about it !
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messaline said:
How can you say that after having said that is dangerous!
YOU MUST SAY: "NEVER NAILS IN REALITY !!!":mad:



Never you can say to a novice to begin with SELF-CRUCIFIXION!
It's too dangerous if she'hasn't read something about it !
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Sounds like you believe its a real issue - that somebody here might be obsessed enough to let herself be NAILED to a cross!?
 
idaconfident said:
Sounds like you believe its a real issue - that somebody here might be obsessed enough to let herself be NAILED to a cross!?
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There is always someone.
 
cast said:
Whoah.
Yeah, I guess. Though I'm pretty sure meaningful resources will carry the message across much more effectively than Caps Lock and angry faces. Sadly, I'm not very well acquiainted with the anatomy experts around here. Maybe someone else will provide the necessary links.
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Indeed, I apologize, my:mad: was a little too strong!
But we had had a problem in the past with a girl who was searching somebody to crucify her and who didn't well know to do the difference between the reality and the fantasy!
So, I think that we do be clear with this: in fantasy, you can hope anything that you want
(and I'm not the last to want my nails or the worst tortures!:D)
But for the reality, no that! Be careful because it's not necessary to have great sufferings to
reach the pleasure in BDSM: I know well that, I'm a Sum and I often practice , crucifixion too!
But always in safety...!:)



Not sure about this. I began doing self-crucifixion as a novice in self-crucifixion, and I got more experienced in self-crucifixion by performing more self-crucifixion. Practice seems to be the only reliable way of acquiring actual skills for me.
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You're a man, Cast, and often a man is more accustomed with the technics and the material
used for crucifixion...For example, nodes are very important to the crucifixion : they could
stop the blood'circulation and cause severe damages...
Danielle is a woman, she has not the strenght of a man and perhaps she's not a ropes'specialist (nodes)...
So, also in self-crucifixion, caution is advised, insomuch as you've nobody coming to help you if you have a problem!;)



Oh, that is certain. But I also believe riding a bike is dangerous if you don't know where the brakes are; however, reading a manual won't teach you how to ride. Heck, reading a ton of manuals and becoming a theory expert may very well lure you into a false sense of security which will quickly dissolve as soon as push comes to shove and you ride straight into a nearby tree. You knew where the brakes were, but there wasn't enough traction. A shame.|/QUOTE]

:amen::D:p

Okay, silly comparisons aside, let me state my point (and perhaps emphasise it for better visibility):

- read a lot on the subject before doing something stupid
- practice A LOT MORE on easy stuff before you become too confident and do something EXTREMELY stupid (because you thought you knew how to)
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Well said and I totally agree!:)
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Hi messaline
The first days here, I thought well,
that much would be real here and not just fantasy
therefore I also had anxiety dedicate my lord that I ended up here

I know him, he would certainly have thought for an implementation
this fantasy in a real way
i was a little naive i think
now i feel very comfortable here
even if I'm different well

Kisses to you
:)
 
Hum, are you really so different than other women (or even men) who are here?
I think that we were going to CF to live in Fantasy what we cant live in reality: very hard tortures and crucifixions which certainly will conduct us to the death!
Some of us are practising BDSM in their reality, some others not, but here, nobody is different:

like could say Tree, there are always here a cross and three nails for each of us!!!:D
...and it's what we wish all...:rolleyes:
 

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messaline said:
Hum, are you really so different than other women (or even men) who are here?
I think that we were going to CF to live in Fantasy what we cant live in reality: very hard tortures and crucifixions which certainly will conduct us to the death!
Some of us are practising BDSM in their reality, some others not, but here, nobody is different:

like could say Tree, there are always here a cross and three nails for each of us!!!:D
...and it's what we wish all...:rolleyes:
Click to expand...

No I do not really b elieve i'm different :cool:
I live my passion and enjoy it to be always brought to my limits
but I'm living it up real

Kisses :)
 
messaline said:
Hum, are you really so different than other women (or even men) who are here?
I think that we were going to CF to live in Fantasy what we cant live in reality: very hard tortures and crucifixions which certainly will conduct us to the death!
Some of us are practising BDSM in their reality, some others not, but here, nobody is different:

like could say Tree, there are always here a cross and three nails for each of us!!!:D
...and it's what we wish all...:rolleyes:
Click to expand...
that's why the old chap is so busy......................and all our wood is gone:bdsm-wink::beer:
 
messaline said:
Indeed, I apologize, my:mad: was a little too strong!
But we had had a problem in the past with a girl who was searching somebody to crucify her and who didn't well know to do the difference between the reality and the fantasy!
So, I think that we do be clear with this: in fantasy, you can hope anything that you want
(and I'm not the last to want my nails or the worst tortures!:D)
But for the reality, no that! Be careful because it's not necessary to have great sufferings to
reach the pleasure in BDSM: I know well that, I'm a Sum and I often practice , crucifixion too!
But always in safety...!:)





You're a man, Cast, and often a man is more accustomed with the technics and the material
used for crucifixion...For example, nodes are very important to the crucifixion : they could
stop the blood'circulation and cause severe damages...
Danielle is a woman, she has not the strenght of a man and perhaps she's not a ropes'specialist (nodes)...
So, also in self-crucifixion, caution is advised, insomuch as you've nobody coming to help you if you have a problem!;)
Click to expand...

I guess its about finding the right balance between boredom and injuries ..
 
So, sympathizing with Danielle's overwhelming desire, I must say the best avenue is to go with a friend or someone you can fully trust to a local BDSM scene. Socialize once you feel comfortable, but you don't necessarily even have to on your first day. You can learn from others, and many here on this site, that we have very intense imaginations, emotions, and desires - all of which can be "fed" in a safe and playful manner.

I used to wander the ground of my property barefoot, shirtless, and alone. Imagining what it would be like to be crucified, I would grab on to trees, I would go home and hang off my bed with arms outstretched, I would become so aroused from that, that it became something of an addiction. That was in my teens. Then I struggled with what to do with my imagination, emotional connection, and desire to experience the crux experience combined with the masturbatory accompaniment all throughout my young adulthood.

Only recently did I find a partner who shares my taste for kink. Only recently did I get brave enough to say "life is too short" and start experimenting in self bondage, partner bondage, scene play, and public bondage scene play. Now I feel so relieved. There are safe and sane ways to feed this crucifixion obsession. You will learn what aspects of play turn you on and what turns you off. If you start step by step, (and communicating with us is a great first step), then you may eventually find yourself in a sort of hypnotic trance, hanging amid your crux dance, cuffed or roped to a cross, without nails or anything else that may be permanently harmful - and yet there you may find yourself perfectly anguished and blissful in every aching fiber of your being.

I know I still hope that I do.
 
cruxing is a rough game, if as deep into the fetish like me and my female friends are, we can still play. I am old and worn out and my women friends are to( they are still very sexy) laying on the floor in the position is as great as the crux dream women images. This not damaging position is a great worm up and is great fun. Good actors please apply
 
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