Wip - Women In Peril

[Deleted member jedakk]

And the warning is not in fine-print!
View attachment 487445 View attachment 487446
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I remember studying that in soil mechanics class when I was in college, although the terminology in this leaves a lot to be desired -"cohesionless" is one word, as is "quicksand." You get what's called a "quick condition" in soil below a dam sometimes when water is flowing under the dam and boiling up through the soil on the downstream side. When that happens it might not be that long until the dam fails catastrophically, and that could ruin your whole day.

On the plus side, it could save you from dying in the quicksand!

 

[Madiosi]

On the plus side, it could save you from dying in the quicksand!

In all bad things....

 

[Eulalia]

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Certainly a harder - well softer - challenge.
Answer to q3 here would probably be 'because she's been condemned by the Crux Court of Justice
and dropped in it by Tree'

Seriously, it does clarify a point that's come up from time to time here -
in US English, 'quicksand' seems to be used pretty loosely to refer to wet mud,
that you can get stuck in (and that's bad news if you're somewhere where the water's rising),
but you don't go on sinking. In UK, at least around where I am and we've got both,
'quicksand' is different, it's strictly speaking the kind described there, and by Jedakk,
where the mechanical properties of the saturated sand mean you go on sinking,
and can't stop yourself.

 

[Barbaria1]

View attachment 487445

Certainly a harder - well softer - challenge.
Answer to q3 here would probably be 'because she's been condemned by the Crux Court of Justice
and dropped in it by Tree'

Seriously, it does clarify a point that's come up from time to time here -
in US English, 'quicksand' seems to be used pretty loosely to refer to wet mud,
that you can get stuck in (and that's bad news if you're somewhere where the water's rising),
but you don't go on sinking. In UK, at least around where I am and we've got both,
'quicksand' is different, it's strictly speaking the kind described there, and by Jedakk,
where the mechanical properties of the saturated sand mean you go on sinking,
and can't stop yourself.

That's an interesting observation. There are often regional differences in how certain words are used and understood here in the U.S. To me, the term means exactly what Jedakk suggests. American English can, in fact, be quite interesting for its regional differences ... whether, for example, one says "sofa", "davenport" or "couch" ... "spigot" or "faucet" ... "privy" or "outhouse", depends very much on what part of the country one lives in.

 

[Eulalia]

I guess so, and in parts that are a long way from any quicksands in the strict sense,
it's not surprising the word's used for something pretty similar.

 

[Loxuru]

And the warning is not in fine-print!

A Star Trek uniform?
This can happen when you 'boldly go where no man has gone before'.

 

[Barbaria1]

A Star Trek uniform?
This can happen when you 'boldly go where no man has gone before'.

And that was a clean uniform too! Save the top, the bottom is already a lost cause.

 

[Jollyrei]

A Star Trek uniform?
This can happen when you 'boldly go where no man has gone before'.

And that was a clean uniform too! Save the top, the bottom is already a lost cause.

Anyway, there's no suspense here. We know she survives. That's a yellow jersey, not red.

 

[Deleted member jedakk]

Anyway, there's no suspense here. We know she survives. That's a yellow jersey, not red.

As in John Scalzi's science fiction novel "Redshirts" where any red-shirted crew who accompany the captain on an away mission always get killed, so they tend to make themselves scarce any time there's an away mission!

 

[thehangingtree]

That's an interesting observation. There are often regional differences in how certain words are used and understood here in the U.S. To me, the term means exactly what Jedakk suggests. American English can, in fact, be quite interesting for its regional differences ... whether, for example, one says "sofa", "davenport" or "couch" ... "spigot" or "faucet" ... "privy" or "outhouse", depends very much on what part of the country one lives in.

To carry Barb's thought farther in NW Arkansas (and the Tree house) what most would call a 'deck' or 'porch' it is known as the 'pisser'...

 

[RacingRodent]

To carry Barb's thought farther in NW Arkansas (and the Tree house) what most would call a 'deck' or 'porch' it is known as the 'pisser'...

I am going to file that in my "Things I know about Arkansas I wish I didn't" Folder....it is a big folder

 

[Deleted member jedakk]

Below is the application to live in NW Arkansas, admittedly somewhat dated:



Name:__________ Nickname: Bubba____ Skeeter____ Other____

Can you sign and spell your name correctly? Sometimes____ Never____

Current Address:_____________ Number of months behind on rent:____

Neck Shade: Light Red___ Medium Red___ Dark Red___ Peeling___

Number of teeth in full grin: 1 ___ 2 ___ 3 ___ More? ___

Approximate size and weight of beer belly:______ Brand of beer:_____

Brand of chewing tobacco:______ Brand of snuff:______


Make of pick-up truck:_______ Size of tires:______ 4 Wheel Drive?___

Number of months behind in payments:_________ Does it have doors?___

Altitude of running boards: 3'___ 6'___ 12'___ 16'___

Number of empty beer cans under the seats:_____ Broken windows?____

Is truck appropiately equipped with the following?

Yes No
-- 8 track Hank Williams tapes: ___ ___
-- Pit Bull ___ ___
-- Air horns ___ ___
-- Roll bar ___ ___
-- Steer horns on hood ___ ___
-- Musical horn that plays "Dixie" ___ ___
-- Red Man chewing tobacco bumper sticker ___ ___
-- I love grits bumper sticker ___ ___
-- "AMERICA, LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT" bumper sticker ___ ___
-- 12 foot CB antenna ___ ___
-- Illegaly altered 1 gigawatt CB transmitter ___ ___
-- Spitoon ___ ___
-- Mud Flaps ___ ___
-- Curb Feelers ___ ___
-- Shot Guns in back window ___ ___


How many of the following items are in your front yard: (working or not)

Yes No
-- Gardens made of old tires ___ ___
-- Trucks or cars ___ ___
-- Chickens or goats ___ ___
-- Household appliances ___ ___
-- Old trailers ___ ___
-- Bath tubs ___ ___
-- TV sets ___ ___

Describe your last Elvis sighting: ______________________________________

Did you think the movie "Deliverance" was a comedy? ___________

Have you ever taken a date to a tractor pull? ____ Hog calling contest? ___


Do you own any of the following? Fertilizer hat?____ Feed Hat?____

Shoes?____ Belt buckles that weigh more than three pounds? _____ If so:

Have you worn them to Funerals___ Weddings___ Church___ Job interviews ___

Fancy restaurants like Denny's____

Do you bathe with: Soap___ Relatives___ Small animals___

How often: Weekly___ Monthly___ Twice a year___ Once a year___

Have you ever been shot at by: Ay-rabs___ Gooks___ Angry husbands___

Wives___ Fathers-in-law___ Mothers-in-law___ The Law___


Does your wife weigh more or less than: Your guitar___ Your truck___

Have you seen her in the past: Two weeks___ Two months___ Two years

Have you ever seen her when she wasn't: Pregnant___ Barefoot___ Mad___

Have you ever stayed sober for a whole weekend?_________

Can you count to 11 with your shoes on?_____ 21 with your pants on?_____

If you have had someone read all the above questions to you and you have
completely understood them then place your "X" on the line below.

>->->->->________________

_________________________
Witness signature

 

[thehangingtree]

Below is the application to live in NW Arkansas, admittedly somewhat dated:



Name:__________ Nickname: Bubba____ Skeeter____ Other____

Can you sign and spell your name correctly? Sometimes____ Never____

Current Address:_____________ Number of months behind on rent:____

Neck Shade: Light Red___ Medium Red___ Dark Red___ Peeling___

Number of teeth in full grin: 1 ___ 2 ___ 3 ___ More? ___

Approximate size and weight of beer belly:______ Brand of beer:_____

Brand of chewing tobacco:______ Brand of snuff:______


Make of pick-up truck:_______ Size of tires:______ 4 Wheel Drive?___

Number of months behind in payments:_________ Does it have doors?___

Altitude of running boards: 3'___ 6'___ 12'___ 16'___

Number of empty beer cans under the seats:_____ Broken windows?____

Is truck appropiately equipped with the following?

Yes No
-- 8 track Hank Williams tapes: ___ ___
-- Pit Bull ___ ___
-- Air horns ___ ___
-- Roll bar ___ ___
-- Steer horns on hood ___ ___
-- Musical horn that plays "Dixie" ___ ___
-- Red Man chewing tobacco bumper sticker ___ ___
-- I love grits bumper sticker ___ ___
-- "AMERICA, LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT" bumper sticker ___ ___
-- 12 foot CB antenna ___ ___
-- Illegaly altered 1 gigawatt CB transmitter ___ ___
-- Spitoon ___ ___
-- Mud Flaps ___ ___
-- Curb Feelers ___ ___
-- Shot Guns in back window ___ ___


How many of the following items are in your front yard: (working or not)

Yes No
-- Gardens made of old tires ___ ___
-- Trucks or cars ___ ___
-- Chickens or goats ___ ___
-- Household appliances ___ ___
-- Old trailers ___ ___
-- Bath tubs ___ ___
-- TV sets ___ ___

Describe your last Elvis sighting: ______________________________________

Did you think the movie "Deliverance" was a comedy? ___________

Have you ever taken a date to a tractor pull? ____ Hog calling contest? ___


Do you own any of the following? Fertilizer hat?____ Feed Hat?____

Shoes?____ Belt buckles that weigh more than three pounds? _____ If so:

Have you worn them to Funerals___ Weddings___ Church___ Job interviews ___

Fancy restaurants like Denny's____

Do you bathe with: Soap___ Relatives___ Small animals___

How often: Weekly___ Monthly___ Twice a year___ Once a year___

Have you ever been shot at by: Ay-rabs___ Gooks___ Angry husbands___

Wives___ Fathers-in-law___ Mothers-in-law___ The Law___


Does your wife weigh more or less than: Your guitar___ Your truck___

Have you seen her in the past: Two weeks___ Two months___ Two years

Have you ever seen her when she wasn't: Pregnant___ Barefoot___ Mad___

Have you ever stayed sober for a whole weekend?_________

Can you count to 11 with your shoes on?_____ 21 with your pants on?_____

If you have had someone read all the above questions to you and you have
completely understood them then place your "X" on the line below.

>->->->->________________

_________________________
Witness signature

Full reply later!!!

 

[Barbaria1]

Below is the application to live in NW Arkansas, admittedly somewhat dated:



Name:__________ Nickname: Bubba____ Skeeter____ Other____

Can you sign and spell your name correctly? Sometimes____ Never____

Current Address:_____________ Number of months behind on rent:____

Neck Shade: Light Red___ Medium Red___ Dark Red___ Peeling___

Number of teeth in full grin: 1 ___ 2 ___ 3 ___ More? ___

Approximate size and weight of beer belly:______ Brand of beer:_____

Brand of chewing tobacco:______ Brand of snuff:______


Make of pick-up truck:_______ Size of tires:______ 4 Wheel Drive?___

Number of months behind in payments:_________ Does it have doors?___

Altitude of running boards: 3'___ 6'___ 12'___ 16'___

Number of empty beer cans under the seats:_____ Broken windows?____

Is truck appropiately equipped with the following?

Yes No
-- 8 track Hank Williams tapes: ___ ___
-- Pit Bull ___ ___
-- Air horns ___ ___
-- Roll bar ___ ___
-- Steer horns on hood ___ ___
-- Musical horn that plays "Dixie" ___ ___
-- Red Man chewing tobacco bumper sticker ___ ___
-- I love grits bumper sticker ___ ___
-- "AMERICA, LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT" bumper sticker ___ ___
-- 12 foot CB antenna ___ ___
-- Illegaly altered 1 gigawatt CB transmitter ___ ___
-- Spitoon ___ ___
-- Mud Flaps ___ ___
-- Curb Feelers ___ ___
-- Shot Guns in back window ___ ___


How many of the following items are in your front yard: (working or not)

Yes No
-- Gardens made of old tires ___ ___
-- Trucks or cars ___ ___
-- Chickens or goats ___ ___
-- Household appliances ___ ___
-- Old trailers ___ ___
-- Bath tubs ___ ___
-- TV sets ___ ___

Describe your last Elvis sighting: ______________________________________

Did you think the movie "Deliverance" was a comedy? ___________

Have you ever taken a date to a tractor pull? ____ Hog calling contest? ___


Do you own any of the following? Fertilizer hat?____ Feed Hat?____

Shoes?____ Belt buckles that weigh more than three pounds? _____ If so:

Have you worn them to Funerals___ Weddings___ Church___ Job interviews ___

Fancy restaurants like Denny's____

Do you bathe with: Soap___ Relatives___ Small animals___

How often: Weekly___ Monthly___ Twice a year___ Once a year___

Have you ever been shot at by: Ay-rabs___ Gooks___ Angry husbands___

Wives___ Fathers-in-law___ Mothers-in-law___ The Law___


Does your wife weigh more or less than: Your guitar___ Your truck___

Have you seen her in the past: Two weeks___ Two months___ Two years

Have you ever seen her when she wasn't: Pregnant___ Barefoot___ Mad___

Have you ever stayed sober for a whole weekend?_________

Can you count to 11 with your shoes on?_____ 21 with your pants on?_____

If you have had someone read all the above questions to you and you have
completely understood them then place your "X" on the line below.

>->->->->________________

_________________________
Witness signature

Full reply later!!!

I was thinking about filling out the application for Tree ... but he says he will do it ... THIS ought to be good!

 

[Barbaria1]

Name:The Hanging Tree Nickname: Bubba____ Skeeter____ OtherHey You!

Can you sign and spell your name correctly? Sometimes____ Never_X__

Current Address:The TreeHouse Number of months behind on rent:__0__

Neck Shade: Light Red___ Medium Red_X__ Dark Red___ Peeling___

Number of teeth in full grin: 1 ___ 2 ___ 3 ___ More? I never grin

Approximate size and weight of beer belly:______ Brand of beer:Seagram's

Brand of chewing tobacco:______ Brand of snuff: crucifixion


Make of pick-up truck:Ford Size of tires:___?___ 4 Wheel Drive?of course

Number of months behind in payments:ask Ulrika Does it have doors?silly question

Altitude of running boards: 3'___ 6'___ 12'___ 16'_X__

Number of empty beer cans under the seats:_____ Broken windows?All since Barb and Siss borrowed.

Is truck appropriately equipped with the following? I refuse to answer anymore of this shit!

Yes No
-- 8 track Hank Williams tapes: ___ ___
-- Pit Bull ___ ___
-- Air horns ___ ___
-- Roll bar ___ ___
-- Steer horns on hood ___ ___
-- Musical horn that plays "Dixie" ___ ___
-- Red Man chewing tobacco bumper sticker ___ ___
-- I love grits bumper sticker ___ ___
-- "AMERICA, LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT" bumper sticker ___ ___
-- 12 foot CB antenna ___ ___
-- Illegaly altered 1 gigawatt CB transmitter ___ ___
-- Spitoon ___ ___
-- Mud Flaps ___ ___
-- Curb Feelers ___ ___
-- Shot Guns in back window ___ ___


How many of the following items are in your front yard: (working or not)

Yes No
-- Gardens made of old tires ___ ___
-- Trucks or cars ___ ___
-- Chickens or goats ___ ___
-- Household appliances ___ ___
-- Old trailers ___ ___
-- Bath tubs ___ ___
-- TV sets ___ ___

Describe your last Elvis sighting: ______________________________________

Did you think the movie "Deliverance" was a comedy? ___________

Have you ever taken a date to a tractor pull? ____ Hog calling contest? ___


Do you own any of the following? Fertilizer hat?____ Feed Hat?____

Shoes?____ Belt buckles that weigh more than three pounds? _____ If so:

Have you worn them to Funerals___ Weddings___ Church___ Job interviews ___

Fancy restaurants like Denny's____

Do you bathe with: Soap___ Relatives___ Small animals___

How often: Weekly___ Monthly___ Twice a year___ Once a year___

Have you ever been shot at by: Ay-rabs___ Gooks___ Angry husbands___

Wives___ Fathers-in-law___ Mothers-in-law___ The Law___


Does your wife weigh more or less than: Your guitar___ Your truck___

Have you seen her in the past: Two weeks___ Two months___ Two years

Have you ever seen her when she wasn't: Pregnant___ Barefoot___ Mad___

Have you ever stayed sober for a whole weekend?_________

Can you count to 11 with your shoes on?_____ 21 with your pants on?_____

If you have had someone read all the above questions to you and you have
completely understood them then place your "X" on the line below.

>->->->->_______X_________

Barbara Moore

Witness signature

 

[rb1956]

well done except you forgot the X on the line below!!!

 

[Barbaria1]

well done except you forgot the X on the line below!!!

Fixed now

 

[thehangingtree]

Name:____Seagram’s, asshole. Oh mine???______ Nickname: Bubba____ Skeeter____ Other_Tree___

Can you sign and spell your name correctly? Sometimes____ Never____

What is ‘spelling’?

Current Address:_Are you with government?__ Number of months behind on rent:_I don’t rent… I shoot tresspassers…___

Neck Shade: Light Red___ Medium Red___ Dark Red___ Peeling___

I shoot assholes, too

Number of teeth in full grin: 1 ___ 2 ___ 3 ___ More? ___

See above…

Approximate size and weight of beer belly:___smaller than yours___ Brand of beer:_Busch longneck bottles

Brand of chewing tobacco:______ Brand of snuff:______

Don’t do that… Marlboro Lights

Make of pick-up truck:_women_ Size of tires:__including the spare on the left front?_ 4 Wheel Drive?_Do they make any other?__

Number of months behind in payments:_Fuck, I stole the damn thing, how should I know what he owes?_ Does it have doors?_Sort of… Quit picking that rust off, Barb!!!__

Altitude of running boards: 3'___ 6'___ 12'___ 16'___

I don’t know, they rusted off….

Number of empty beer cans under the seats:__Only a few, they pay you to pick up the same cans I toss out the window___ Broken windows?_I didn’t mean to smash Barb’s head against the window. She doesn’t remember a thing… Don’t tell her…___

Is truck appropiately equipped with the following?

Yes No
-- 8 track Hank Williams tapes: ___Fucker… it is a stereo cassette ___
-- Pit Bull ___I don’t talk about my magnificent cock… ___
-- Air horns ___Don’t know… Since the air bag went off nothing works ___
-- Roll bar ___I smoke Madame Wu’s, I don’t need a bar to roll on… ___
-- Steer horns on hood ___I said the air bag went off, the steering wheel still works___
-- Musical horn that plays "Dixie" ___I won’t use ‘that’ picture ___
-- Red Man chewing tobacco bumper sticker ___The bumper rusted off ___
-- I love grits bumper sticker ___see above ___
-- "AMERICA, LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT" bumper sticker ___see above ___
-- 12 foot CB antenna ___No need, see below ___
-- Illegaly altered 1 gigawatt CB transmitter ___Glad Obama is gone, the FCC is silent on this… ___
-- Spitoon ___Recycled it, I have a deck ___
-- Mud Flaps ___Her tits don’t sag that bad!!! ___
-- Curb Feelers ___What is he talking about? Is he from the IRS? ___
-- Shot Guns in back window ___No, I tossed a log through that. I sawed off the shotgun and can keep it on the seat ___


How many of the following items are in your front yard: (working or not)

Yes No
-- Gardens made of old tires ___ ???
-- Trucks or cars ___ Running or not???
-- Chickens or goats ___ Mine or what I stole?
-- Household appliances ___ Keep out of my drawer!!!

-- Old trailers Please define
-- Bath tubs What for?
-- TV sets ___ We don’t cotton to transvestites….

Describe your last Elvis sighting: ___Remember the shotgun I sawed off???_____

Did you think the movie "Deliverance" was a comedy? _See above_

Have you ever taken a date to a tractor pull? ____ Hog calling contest? ___


Do you own any of the following? Fertilizer hat?____ Feed Hat?____

Shoes?____ Belt buckles that weigh more than three pounds? _____ If so:

Have you worn them to Funerals___ Weddings___ Church___ Job interviews ___

Fancy restaurants like Denny's____they just closed the Eurika, Missouri Denny’s… Are you picking on me?

Do you bathe with: Soap___ Relatives___ Small animals___

Yes

How often: Weekly___ Monthly___ Twice a year___ Once a year___

You pervert…

Have you ever been shot at by: Ay-rabs___ Gooks___ Angry husbands___

Wives___ Fathers-in-law___ Mothers-in-law___ The Law___

Most of us are grateful when someone does our wives…


Does your wife weigh more or less than: Your guitar___ Your truck___

Have you seen her in the past: Two weeks___ Two months___ Two years

Have you ever seen her when she wasn't: Pregnant___ Barefoot___ Mad___

Have you ever stayed sober for a whole weekend?___Never for a week… You need to do some homework!!!______

Can you count to 11 with your shoes on?_____ 21 with your pants on?__I would need more than ten fingers to wrap up number… Wait!!! You are trying to get me to post ‘That’ picture!!!___

If you have had someone read all the above questions to you and you have
completely understood them then place your "X" on the line below.

> ->->->->____Leave my ‘ex’ out of this!____________

_____We shoot Jehovah Witnesses, nothing against them… they just are easy targets…__
Witness signature

 

[Barbaria1]

Name:____Seagram’s, asshole. Oh mine???______ Nickname: Bubba____ Skeeter____ Other_Tree___

Can you sign and spell your name correctly? Sometimes____ Never____

What is ‘spelling’?

Current Address:_Are you with government?__ Number of months behind on rent:_I don’t rent… I shoot tresspassers…___

Neck Shade: Light Red___ Medium Red___ Dark Red___ Peeling___

I shoot assholes, too

Number of teeth in full grin: 1 ___ 2 ___ 3 ___ More? ___

See above…

Approximate size and weight of beer belly:___smaller than yours___ Brand of beer:_Busch longneck bottles

Brand of chewing tobacco:______ Brand of snuff:______

Don’t do that… Marlboro Lights

Make of pick-up truck:_women_ Size of tires:__including the spare on the left front?_ 4 Wheel Drive?_Do they make any other?__

Number of months behind in payments:_Fuck, I stole the damn thing, how should I know what he owes?_ Does it have doors?_Sort of… Quit picking that rust off, Barb!!!__

Altitude of running boards: 3'___ 6'___ 12'___ 16'___

I don’t know, they rusted off….

Number of empty beer cans under the seats:__Only a few, they pay you to pick up the same cans I toss out the window___ Broken windows?_I didn’t mean to smash Barb’s head against the window. She doesn’t remember a thing… Don’t tell her…___

Is truck appropiately equipped with the following?

Yes No
-- 8 track Hank Williams tapes: ___Fucker… it is a stereo cassette ___
-- Pit Bull ___I don’t talk about my magnificent cock… ___
-- Air horns ___Don’t know… Since the air bag went off nothing works ___
-- Roll bar ___I smoke Madame Wu’s, I don’t need a bar to roll on… ___
-- Steer horns on hood ___I said the air bag went off, the steering wheel still works___
-- Musical horn that plays "Dixie" ___I won’t use ‘that’ picture ___
-- Red Man chewing tobacco bumper sticker ___The bumper rusted off ___
-- I love grits bumper sticker ___see above ___
-- "AMERICA, LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT" bumper sticker ___see above ___
-- 12 foot CB antenna ___No need, see below ___
-- Illegaly altered 1 gigawatt CB transmitter ___Glad Obama is gone, the FCC is silent on this… ___
-- Spitoon ___Recycled it, I have a deck ___
-- Mud Flaps ___Her tits don’t sag that bad!!! ___
-- Curb Feelers ___What is he talking about? Is he from the IRS? ___
-- Shot Guns in back window ___No, I tossed a log through that. I sawed off the shotgun and can keep it on the seat ___


How many of the following items are in your front yard: (working or not)

Yes No
-- Gardens made of old tires ___ ???
-- Trucks or cars ___ Running or not???
-- Chickens or goats ___ Mine or what I stole?
-- Household appliances ___ Keep out of my drawer!!!

-- Old trailers Please define
-- Bath tubs What for?
-- TV sets ___ We don’t cotton to transvestites….

Describe your last Elvis sighting: ___Remember the shotgun I sawed off???_____

Did you think the movie "Deliverance" was a comedy? _See above_

Have you ever taken a date to a tractor pull? ____ Hog calling contest? ___


Do you own any of the following? Fertilizer hat?____ Feed Hat?____

Shoes?____ Belt buckles that weigh more than three pounds? _____ If so:

Have you worn them to Funerals___ Weddings___ Church___ Job interviews ___

Fancy restaurants like Denny's____they just closed the Eurika, Missouri Denny’s… Are you picking on me?

Do you bathe with: Soap___ Relatives___ Small animals___

Yes

How often: Weekly___ Monthly___ Twice a year___ Once a year___

You pervert…

Have you ever been shot at by: Ay-rabs___ Gooks___ Angry husbands___

Wives___ Fathers-in-law___ Mothers-in-law___ The Law___

Most of us are grateful when someone does our wives…


Does your wife weigh more or less than: Your guitar___ Your truck___

Have you seen her in the past: Two weeks___ Two months___ Two years

Have you ever seen her when she wasn't: Pregnant___ Barefoot___ Mad___

Have you ever stayed sober for a whole weekend?___Never for a week… You need to do some homework!!!______

Can you count to 11 with your shoes on?_____ 21 with your pants on?__I would need more than ten fingers to wrap up number… Wait!!! You are trying to get me to post ‘That’ picture!!!___

If you have had someone read all the above questions to you and you have
completely understood them then place your "X" on the line below.

> ->->->->____Leave my ‘ex’ out of this!____________

_____We shoot Jehovah Witnesses, nothing against them… they just are easy targets…__
Witness signature

Priceless!!!!

 

[thehangingtree]

Priceless!!!!

Thank you and for my next act....