Chapter 2
Chapter 2. Johanna. Her way to Golgotha (Special thank's to Mr Madiosi )
Review
In the previous chapter we got acquainted with Johanna of Nazareth, ‘God’s daughter.’
Johanna was sentenced to be crucified on Golgotha. She was whipped and received 20 hard lashes from a Roman flagellum. (Maximum for a slender petite young woman.)
We were told the story of her trial, which resulted in a death sentence, crucifixion, for this innocent sweet woman. Horrible! We also learnt in chapter one that she will hang naked on the tree of shame, and with a cornu attached to her cross.
This chapter starts when Johanna takes her first faltering steps towards Golgotha ‘encouraged’ by Roman soldiers equipped with whips……
She carries her crossbeam naked. Her crossbar is tied over her whipped shoulders. Her thick black pubic hair can be admired by any spectator.
We follow her via Crucis from Johanna’s and others perspective:
Johanna’s perspective – torture and doubts
Me, Johanna of Nazareth, take a few faltering steps forward. I am sentenced to be crucified. Sentenced to die! I have just been burdened with my crossbar. Ironically, it’s a patibulum that has been made by me!
As a teenager I helped my father in his wood working workshop. It’s normal for children to help their parents with their work. In my case it involved making crosses!
I saw the small branding on the crossbar earlier, JON, Johanna Of Nazareth! Destiny’s cruel coincidence! Johanna of Nazareth, me, the carpenter’s daughter, will be crucified on a patibulum made by myself!
My God, it’s heavy, and the wood tears up wounds from my flogging….and the pain that I experience now is nothing compared to what awaits me at Golgotha!
I have lived a very strange life….my early visions of being ‘God’s daughter’, that I was something special. My childhood was difficult, I was often bullied by other children, being the only blonde girl in Nazareth…. daughter of a whore, they called me….
Helping my father as a carpenter, making crosses for the Romans did not exactly increase my popularity either…and my strange visions about being ‘God’s daughter from early age…. I have had a different and difficult childhood, but my communication with God helped me…real or imagined….
Then my last year…. I left Nazareth when my father died, and started preaching God’s message, as I perceived it in my visions…I performed miracles, at least the public regarded them that way….and now, I am going to die! I am only 22! Sentenced to be crucified naked!
I walk slowly through the open fortress gate. The guards at the gate look scornfully at my tortured naked body….my breasts that wobble…. I hear them say: Hail princess, ha, ha!!!! Enjoy your time on the throne provided for you!
AJ! My feet hurts, I am barefoot and gravel and small stones hurt my tender tiny feet. I must try and balance my crossbar that I carry over my shoulders, a few mistakes and I will fall!
Swooooosh!!!! Crack!!!!
I feel another lash from the whip hit my tender feminine back. My back is severely tortured from my earlier flogging. Crisscrossed with red welts and bleeding wounds. I am glad that they did not destroy my front and breasts though. Not that it matters much, before nightfall I will be dead, gone. Wonder what death will be like??? All my dreams about heaven, have they been just dreams? Maybe only darkness exists, or hell! Me believing I was God’s daughter, was it just an illusion?????
I begin to feel despair! My thoughts are interrupted when a guard shouts at me:
‘Come un ugly cow, your cross is waiting for you! MOVE!!’ He pushes me on my wounded shoulder.
I try to walk a bit faster, not so easy when I just have been flogged, and I carry 15 kg of timber over my shoulders…..that’s quite much for me, I am a slender and tiny young woman…..a woman that will die naked on the cross today after hours of agony and pain that will seem like an eternity.
I lift my head and I check out my procession. In the front, I see the young boy that carries a stick with a placard declaring my crime. The placard reads ‘Johanna of Nazareth, God’s daughter, Sedition’. I see people pointing at my titulus and me. They laugh!
I hear a spectator, one of many, heckling me: He sounds familiar, I believe it is someone from my hometown: ‘Johanna, Johanna, I believe you have mixed up your fathers! You are not God’s daughter, you are just the crazy daughter of that dead carpenter in your hometown, Joseph! A suitable end for his daughter, he made crosses, and now you end up crucified!! Ha, ha, that’s justice! ‘Suffer bitch’!
I start to cry, such cruel words! I nearly fall as I stumble a few more steps forward, touched by all harsh accusations! My mind is so confused. Maybe that man is right, maybe I am just the carpenter’s daughter. My visons from God, maybe I hallucinated it all. Nothing divine about me at all, maybe I am just a horny sex obsessed masochistic girl. A girl that will die young. NOOOOOOOO!
SWOSH, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH…
I taste the whip yet another time on my via Crucis! Another lash hits my butt! It’s a little less painful this time, maybe the soldiers start to worry that I will not make it to the execution ground……that means more work for them, so they don’t act out of pity!
I take another look at my procession. In the very front an officer on a horse, followed by the young boy, the placard bearer. After him three soldiers in a row. Then me, the condemned naked woman, flanked on both sides with one soldier. Behind me another three soldiers. These soldiers will not crucify me, their task is the security, to be guards when the carnifex and his assistants nail me to my cross.
In all the distance to Golgotha hill is about 700 meters. Maybe I have walked half of it now, I think I can see the city gate. I hear insults all the time. I thought I heard one man saying that he would buy my corpse and then fuck it! What is wrong with people! God, oh God, change people’s hearts!’
I look up yet another time. Most of the time my gaze is on the ground, because of the weight on my shoulders, and I need to see where I put my feet, in order not to fall.
I am shocked when I realise how many people that follow my crucifixion procession, the streets are crowded! Most of spectators continue to shout hateful comments towards me. I have almost stopped believing that there is a heavenly father, but I try and pray some more to God despite my doubt’s: ‘Father, make them embrace love’. Although I now doubt God’s existence, it’s the only way I can comfort myself….I have no other alternatives……
Just as I finished my prayer, the guards allow a teenager to come forward and pinch one of my tender nipples………..AIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!! Bastards!
I manage to lift my head once more. My heart races, I see some friendly but sad faces. It’s my earthly mother Mary, and my favourite disciples Barbara of Tiberias and Eulalia of Sidon! Oh my God, I love you so much! I make eye contact with this little group.
They must have heard the terrible news, that I have been sentenced to die on the cross today. I know that each day’s executions are advertised on a placard on the outside of the wall to the Roman fortress, I guess that they read about my execution there.
I see that Barbara and Eulalia tries to comfort my poor mother, Mary. She looks totally heartbroken. Not so strange I, my father died one year ago, and now she will lose me, her only child. Killed by the Romans, crucified naked and disgraced. I shiver then I think of death once more. Will I have a proper burial, or will my corpse be left to rot on my cross? Oh God, help me!
Now we change to Mary’s perspective:
I spot the crucifixion procession coming closer to me:
My God, there she is! My sweet daughter, my lovely daughter! What have they done to you!!!! I read the announcement about your crucifixion outside the fortress. I could not believe it. You have only done good deeds! NOOOOOO!
Me, Mary thinks some more about my daughter. My mind can’t comprehend that my beautiful daughter, the sweetest and kindest person in this cruel world, has received a death sentence. Crucifixion! Naked!
She has helped a lot of people, healed them! Preached about love and compassion. Done nothing wrong! Even the protest outside the temple was made with good intentions! Now they are going to kill my sweet and only child! She is only 22!
What have they put on my sweet daughter’s head? My God, it’s a crown of thorns. She is bleeding, her lovely long blonde hair and her forehead gets stained! She is paraded almost naked! Such disgrace!
This is not right! She does not deserve to be crucified! God help her, God save her!
Back to Johanna’s perspective.
I see how my mother Mary fall to her knees, crying, sobbing, and praying to God:
I vaguely hear her prayer ‘Dear God, help my sweet daughter, please!’’ Stop this crucifixion, stop it! She is innocent!!!!’
I state moments later that my mother’s prayers are unanswered. I continue my naked death march towards my crucifixion. I see Barbara helping my mother to get back on her feet again.
I watch as the women tries to come closer to me, hoping to make a better eye contact. They fight their way through the hateful crowd.
I see that my mother Mary needs to be supported by Barbara and Eulalia to be able to stand up, her legs are shaking too much…Mother is also sobbing a lot!
I meet Mary’s gaze as she takes a look at me, her abused, tortured daughter, her only child: I can read my poor mother’s thoughts, how she despairs when she sees her naked daughter walking towards her execution. Her vain hopes that someone will intervene and set me free!' That Pilate will issue a last-minute pardon.
I watch as this all becomes too much for my poor mother. I hear her shout to one of the soldiers that are whipping me: ‘Stop whipping my daughter’!!!
I hear the soldier shouting back: ‘Don’t interfere woman, unless you also want to be crucified!’
I see how Barbara quickly puts her hand over my mother’s mouth, and she says ‘sorry’ to the soldier. I see my mother collapsing on the street. Suddenly I cannot see them anymore, my loved ones are lost in the crowd. I look to the ground and continue slowly forward.
AHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Another lash from the whip hit’s my bleeding back, followed by the command: Move faster cunnus, Jewish bitch! Your cross is eager to make your acquaintance!
Now to Barbara’s perspective:
Me, Barbara, Johanna’s most beloved disciple, watch spellbound as Johanna struggles forward, naked and tortured towards Golgotha. I look at Johanna’s body. I am ashamed about my feelings evolving in my mind., when I look at Johanna, carrying her crosspiece. Her swaying breasts, her unique lovely blonde hair that I caressed yesterday. Her wonderful body that I fucked. Our lovemaking……
I can’t help it, but it is an erotic scene that I watch. It makes me sexually excited! My pussy is so wet, I can even feel some pussy juices dripping on my inner thighs! My clit is stiff as an iron bar! Nipple’s rock hard, feels like they will soon explode!
Such an absurd paradox: The woman that me, Barbara, admires the most in this world, that I love, is walking towards her execution, towards her crucifixion and I feel both horror and extreme lust!
I am very ashamed, lusting when I watch how the love of my life take faltering steps towards her crucifixion, towards her death!
I start praying for forgiveness silently. Johanna has taught me to pray whenever I feel the need, and right now I feel a very urgent need:
‘Forgive me God, forgive me Johanna! I can’t help it Johanna, but I feel lust when I watch your naked whipped body, carrying your heavy cross piece! You are so sexy and beautiful despite the torture that you have endured!’
‘Your nakedness, your marks from your whipping, your crown of thorns, your skimpy dirty loin cloth…..it all enhances your beauty, my beloved Johanna! It’s a sin that I say this, I know, but you will look lovely hanging on your cross my love!’
‘I am sorry, I love you Johanna, please forgive me! I am just a sinner, a horny sex obsessed masochist who is turned on when I watch or think about crucifixion! I can’t help it, I climax when I think about crucified girls! I admit I got horny when I read the announcement about your crucifixion earlier today. Sorry!!! Oh God, forgive me, I am a sinner’
Barbara continues: ‘Johanna, hear my prayer: 'Please forgive me my sinful thoughts, but make me pay for my sins, cleanse me! Cleanse my perverted soul! Make me pay for my perverted thoughts!’
I am now even hornier than just moments ago. I can’t take it no more! I needs to do something about my extreme lustful cravings before I explode sexually. My pussy is on fire!
I leave the crucifixion procession. I find a tree nearby where I can hide for a moment. I lean my back against the tree, pretending it is a cross! My body is almost bursting of sexual desire! I lift my simple greyish tunic. I use no underwear, which is practical. With one hand I start pinching and fondling my nipples and my womanly tender breasts. With my other hand I start rubbing my engorged clit. I put two fingers in my soaking pussy! I increase the speed of my movements, and my masturbation scenario is my own future crucifixion! I am imagining laying naked on a Roman cross!
My breathing become heavier and heavier……contractions in my pussy becoming stronger and stronger… I envision the first nail being driven through my wrist, I can’t take it no more! I stand behind the tree screaming:
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!, Johanna, I am coming!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Nobody notices my orgasm, the people on the streets are busy taunting and shouting to Johanna.
I hear words like ‘kill the blasphemer, kill the slut, crucify the one who dares call herself God’s daughter!’! I think, so unfair, my Johanna is the sweetest woman in the world. I love her!
I arrange my tunic after my intense masturbation. I catch up with Johanna’s crucifixion procession and I re-unite with Mary and Eulalia. We manage to walk past the crucifixion procession. Our trio rushes up to Golgotha hill, we want to find good places near Johanna’s cross to be. I pay an officer, and we are given good places close to Johanna’s cross to be. Maybe we will be able to say a few words to her before she dies on her cross.
Back to Johanna’s perspective:
I suddenly realise that I have almost reached my execution site. I can discern the torture stakes, the upright poles that soon will be completed with crossbars and naked women, one of the crosses will be mine…….
I have started to walk up to Golgotha hill.
‘Oh God it’s so hard! My crossbar is too heavy!’ I feel yet another lash from the whip on my back.
Suddenly I, Johanna of Nazareth hear horrible screams! The screams seem to come from a woman who is being nailed to her patibulum. The screams must come from Golgotha hill, my place of execution. Soon it will be me, Johanna, the carpenter’s daughter that will scream like a slaughtered lamb when I am nailed to my cross!!! I will scream and suffer until I die.
I start murmuring ‘no, no, no, please save me father, not the cross, not the cross, not the cross………it’s a mistake, it’s a mistake.’ I don’t want to drink this cup, father, I never desired to be crucified for real. My crucifixion obsession was just a crazy sexual fantasy of mine! Forgive me father, make a miracle, save your daughter!! Make my mother go to Pilate, tell him that I am willing to be his personal sex slave!
My thoughts continue, I realise that all hope is gone……I notice that I am not the only woman that will die today. I wonder who she is, which crime has she committed, the woman that just got crucified? Will there be other crucifixa’s today or is it just me and the woman they are nailing right now?
From a distance I watch how the woman’s crossbar is lifted and fitted to her stipes.
I can see how the carnifex nails her feet, one foot over the other, and completes her crucifixion. She seems to be the first woman crucified of today's prisoners; I can’t see anybody else hanging on a cross right now. Maybe someone is laying on the ground, awaiting execution. Soon I will know.
The carnifex’s perspective:
‘Good, now me, carnifex Madiosi, and my assistants have nailed this runaway slave woman, Kathy to her cross. I need some more wine, but I need to hurry up and crucify the other slave woman, Emilia. She is babbling a lot, I need to make her shut up. I am tired of her whimpering!
I look at the path leading to Golgotha hill: ‘Now I see the last prisoner, the semi famous prophetess, Johanna of Nazareth. Strange story, I knew her father, Joseph the carpenter. I heard that he is dead, I used to buy crosses from him. Now I will soon crucify his daughter! Indeed a weird world that we live in!
Prophetess or not, my documents says that she has been sentenced by Pilate to die on a cross today. It is my job to see to that that is done.’ She should have married and stayed at home instead of starting this new crazy movement, see where that has taken her now!
To me, to a cross! Naked and disgraced!
My thoughts continue:
‘She is the last prisoner today and she is not that much delayed. Good, then I will make it in time to the brothel! I hope Mary Magdalene is working tonight!
‘My God, this woman looks very pretty! What a lovely body, boobs, and face! I must look in my execution papers again: Her name is Johanna of Nazareth. Yeah, I remember that the carpenter in Nazareth, Joseph who made crosses for us mentioned his daughter’s name. I also remember now that she normally followed him then they delivered crosses.
Hmmm, my papers says that her crime is sedition and blasphemy. Claims to be ‘God’s daughter’???? Crazy girl, I know she is the daughter of Joseph of Nazareth, the diseased carpenter. Well, maybe not his real daughter. Rumours says that her mother was unfaithful with a Roman soldier from the very north! Hard to explain her blonde hair otherwise!
Hmmm, I better be careful when I crucify her, she could be some kind of witch….ha, ha! what else…..my papers also states that a cornu should be mounted on her cross. I know I got a couple of good ones to choose from….will be fun to see her reactions when she rides it…..
‘Now I will nail the other slave girl, Emilia, to her cross, before this Johanna becomes my guest’.
End of chapter 2
XXX