Limericks

[twonines]

Tea, served in finest bone china,
At breakfast there’s just nothing finer.
I can picture our Barb
In some slinky silk garb
Sipping tea while she rubs her..
(Couldn’t think of a rhyme for “China” and “finer”)

Pet Mynah?

 

[montycrusto]

Pet Mynah?

Bloody brilliant! Btw I think you missed a couple at the bottom of page 50

 

[twonines]

Bloody brilliant! Btw I think you missed a couple at the bottom of page 50

Got them now, thanks.

 

[montycrusto]

Got them now, thanks.

No problem

 

[montycrusto]

Revised version. With thanks to @twonines a joint effort.. pass the joint back now please..

Tea, served in finest bone china,
At breakfast there’s just nothing finer.
I can picture our Barb
In some slinky silk garb
Sipping tea while she strokes her pet mynah...

 

[Wragg]

In truth, there's nobody finer
Than Monty, who with a five liner
When thinking of Barb
In her fine silken garb
He doesn't define her 'a whiner'.

(Sorry, @montycrusto, some temptation is impossible to resist... )

 

[twonines]

Wragg, in an unobtrusive way,
Knows exactly just what to say,
His verses are smart,
They come from the heart,
And he usually posts one a day.

 

[Barbaria1]

Wragg certainly knows restraint
Like some others here he ain’t
Refreshing he is
At rhyming a wiz
We ought to make him a saint

 

[montycrusto]

Sorry, @montycrusto, some temptation is impossible to resist... )

Wragg, in an unobtrusive way,
Knows exactly just what to say,
His verses are smart,
They come from the heart,
And he usually posts one a day.

Dear @Wragg , you have my admiration,
For all the astute observation
You bring to this thread;
And as Oscar Wilde said:
“Resist everything, except temptation!”

 

[twonines]

Barb turned that one out in rush,
She doesn`t just sit on her tush.
She got every line
To scan and to rhyme,
Her talent`s been hiding under a bush..

 

[montycrusto]

Wragg certainly knows restraint
Like some others here he ain’t

Well.. I have a collection of restraints.. doesn’t that count?

 

[twonines]

Obviously, something`s not right,
Penning Limericks, at this time of night.
Could there be anything worse,
Than this puerile verse,
And the end is nowhere in sight.

 

[montycrusto]

Wragg certainly knows restraint
Like some others here he ain’t

An absurd picture Barb paints,
As my reputation she taints..
@Wragg she enjoys
For the “restraint” he employs,
But my basement is FULL of restraints!

 

[montycrusto]

Could there be anything worse,
Than this puerile verse,

Not thinking of anyone in particular I hope?

 

[Barbaria1]

Bedtime for Monty is nigh
With relief I now can sigh
No more rhyme
For some time
Sleep well dear Monty, goodbye

 

[montycrusto]

Bedtime for Monty is nigh
With relief I now can sigh
No more rhyme
For some time
Sleep well dear Monty, goodbye

I retire to my bed alone
And silently stifle a moan
Because Barb isn’t there
So I can’t pull her hair
And give her tight-little the bone.

 

[montycrusto]

My bed (you’ll be glad to know) boasts
At its corners, four stout wooden posts.
So when Barb comes to stay
She’ll be bound night and day;
I’m surely the kindest of hosts!

 

[montycrusto]

With her limbs outstretched in an X,
She is tied spread-eagled for sex..
Blindfolded and gagged
‘Cos I don’t wanna be nagged,
I’m a Montyasaurus Rex!

 

[montycrusto]

My hands crush her tumescent breasts,
As my pleasure orgasmically crests.
An “Mmmph!” is heard,
But that’s not the safe word,
So no hindrance to future fuck-fests.

 

[montycrusto]

The gag is a useful addition
To Barb’s bound and helpless condition,
So she never complains
As I fuck out her brains
In every sex position...