Anklebiter
Magistrate
Thank you for sharing these. This girl is adorable.
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Now This Just Isn't Funny
- Thread starter admihoek
- Start date
Loxuru
Graf von Kreuzigung
A young boy had just gotten his driver's permit and enquired of his father, if they could discuss his use of the car.
His father said, "I'll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, get your hair cut and we'll talk about the car."
Well, the boy thought about that for a moment, and settle for the offer, and they agreed on it.
After about six weeks they went in to the study, where his father said, "Son, I've been real proud. You've brought your grades up, and I've observed that you have been studying your Bible, and participating a lot more in the Bible study groups. But, I'm real disappointed, since you haven't gotten your hair cut."
The young man paused a moment, and then said, "You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair and there's even a strong argument that Jesus had long hair also."
To this his father replied, "Did you also notice they all walked everywhere they went?"
His father said, "I'll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, get your hair cut and we'll talk about the car."
Well, the boy thought about that for a moment, and settle for the offer, and they agreed on it.
After about six weeks they went in to the study, where his father said, "Son, I've been real proud. You've brought your grades up, and I've observed that you have been studying your Bible, and participating a lot more in the Bible study groups. But, I'm real disappointed, since you haven't gotten your hair cut."
The young man paused a moment, and then said, "You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair and there's even a strong argument that Jesus had long hair also."
To this his father replied, "Did you also notice they all walked everywhere they went?"
Migoz2
Senator
M
montycrusto
Guest
And there ended her dreams of being a fireman…This is definitely not funny. Not funny at all............
(gif externally hosted)
Hugin&Munin
Presenter Of Images
And all because of a few tiny mechanical problems. Newton's fault, why did he only write something about falling apples and not about tall, heavy women on not-so-stable bars?And there ended her dreams of being a fireman…
Crux-Emperor Baracus X
Rectidolor
Oh,the Irony !!
Loxuru
Graf von Kreuzigung
Isaac Newton, as Master of the Royal Mint, had counterfeiters executed by hanging. So, he had plenty material to study the effect of gravity on body weight!And all because of a few tiny mechanical problems. Newton's fault, why did he only write something about falling apples and not about tall, heavy women on not-so-stable bars?
Hugin&Munin
Presenter Of Images
The hay harvest.
Naraku
Draconarius
Indian Hills, Colorado.
The sign has become legendary.
Man Comes Up With the Most Punderful Road Signs to Make Passersby Smile
The amount of joy that these signs bring should not be punderestimated.
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A good-looking guy is sitting in a bar, sipping a whiskey.
He notices a gorgeous woman at the end of the bar, talking with a friend.
He calls over a waiter, and sends them both a martini, along with a note asking for the gorgeous woman's phone number.
Ten minutes later, the friend walks over with a note.
It reads:
"Unless you have a Mercedes parked outside, a million bucks in the bank, and eight inches in your pants, you're not getting anything from me."
The man finishes his whiskey, considering his response.
He then writes this down on a piece of paper, hands it to the friend, and walks out:
"Actually, I only have about $300k in the bank; most of my net worth is in the three dozen buildings I own downtown. And today, I'm driving the Porsche; the Benz, Hummer, and Lamborghini are currently at my summer residence.
But If you think I'm cutting off two inches for you, you can f#%k right off."
He notices a gorgeous woman at the end of the bar, talking with a friend.
He calls over a waiter, and sends them both a martini, along with a note asking for the gorgeous woman's phone number.
Ten minutes later, the friend walks over with a note.
It reads:
"Unless you have a Mercedes parked outside, a million bucks in the bank, and eight inches in your pants, you're not getting anything from me."
The man finishes his whiskey, considering his response.
He then writes this down on a piece of paper, hands it to the friend, and walks out:
"Actually, I only have about $300k in the bank; most of my net worth is in the three dozen buildings I own downtown. And today, I'm driving the Porsche; the Benz, Hummer, and Lamborghini are currently at my summer residence.
But If you think I'm cutting off two inches for you, you can f#%k right off."
Hugin&Munin
Presenter Of Images
For all computer problems have simply stated:
The second one means the Mouse arrow.
The second one means the Mouse arrow.
Your gonna need a bigger bullseye !
Hugin&Munin
Presenter Of Images
Last edited:
Althanie J
Magistrate
That.....made me chuckle lol