Anyone else left to insult?
A woman and her 12-year-old son were riding in a taxi in Detroit.
It was raining and all the prostitutes were standing under awnings.
"Mom," said the boy, "what are all those women doing?"
"They're waiting for their husbands to get off work," she replied.
The taxi driver turns around and says, "Geez lady, why don't you tell
him the truth? They're hookers, boy! They have sex with men for
money."
The little boy's eyes get wide and he says, "Is that true Mom?"
His mother, glaring hard at the driver, answers "Yes."
After a few minutes the kid asks, "Mom, if those women have babies,
what happens to them?"
She said, "Most of them become taxi drivers."
An elderly, but hardy cattleman from Texas once told a young female
neighbor that if she wanted to live a long life, the secret was to
sprinkle a pinch of gunpowder on her oatmeal each morning.
She did this religiously and lived to the age of 103.
She left behind 14 children, 30 grandchildren, 21 great-grandchildren,
five great-great-grandchildren and a 40 foot hole where the
crematorium used to be.
A man and woman were married for many years.
Whenever there was a confrontation, yelling could be heard deep into the night.
The old man would shout, "When I die, I will dig my way up and out of
the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!"
Neighbors feared him.
The old man liked the fact that he was feared.
Then one evening he died when he was 98.
After the burial, her neighbors, concerned for her, asked, "Aren't you
afraid that he may indeed be able to dig his way out of the grave and
haunt you for the rest of your life?"
The wife said, "Let him dig. I had him buried upside down and I know
he won't ask for directions."